Chapter One

For the first time

We had been celebrating my high score all night, and had been served with all kinds of foods and beverages. Effie had been so tipsy that she hadn't noticed that both me and Peeta also enjoyed the bright pink and yellow drinks that contained alcohol. Haymitch had been so drunk that he'd fallen over and decided to sleep on the bar-floor, so he didn't notice that me and Peeta left the bar. We were both drunk, since neither one of us had tasted alcohol before. While wiggling to our rooms, we giggled and laughed to each other, for no particular reason. In my mind I kept thinking that Haymitch should be happier, after all, since that was what alcohol seemed to do.
"This is my room" Peeta said, and I noticed that we already were standing outside the door to his room. I pouted with my lower lip.
"I don't want to sleep." I said. "Can't we go to the roof? Pl-e-ease?"
Peeta laughed and threw me over his shoulder. If I would have been sober, I'd scream and tell him to put me down, but that wasn't the case now. I actually enjoyed him carrying me.
"Let's go my dearest" Peeta said in that high-pitch Capitol tone that we both hated, and I couldn't help but to laugh. I laughed even more when Peeta ran through the stairs and corridors to the roof. He put me down on the hard concrete, and I smiled when I noticed that all the pillows and mattresses from our last visit were still there. The sun had already settled, the only source of light was the moon. It was beautiful, and somehow it reminded me of home. My heart ached.
"Last one there has to wash Haymitch tomorrow!" Peeta laughed and ran past me. I grunted and also started running towards the fort of bedspreads, forgetting the sadness in the situation of us being in Capitol for a game that could cost us our lives. I easily ran past him, and jumped down on a big mattress. I was drunk, drunk, drunk, but it didn't feel wrong, quite the contrary! It was nice to be irresponsible and not the one who always has to take care of things.
I opened my eyes as Peeta fell down next to me. I looked at him and admired his long lashes. They were blond, almost golden, and the moon made them glimmer in a way that I had never seen before. In that moment I wished that I could paint as good as he did. I wanted to capture that image. I could see that he was blushing as I stroked his cheek. His skin was soft.
"Katniss, what are you doing?" he asked in a confused tone. His voice was beautiful even when he was confused. I smiled and pinched his nose.
"Nothing" I answered and turned on my back. The sky was beautiful, filled with thousands of stars, many more than back home. I wondered how it was possible.
There was a moment of silence, and I could sense that Peeta was staring at me. It didn't bother me, and it surprised me to notice that Peeta's presence didn't bother me at all. I wondered if he admired my lashes like I had a moment ago. The thought made me smile.
"Can I ask you something?" Peeta asked. I turned to my side, and grinned.
"You just did" I said. Peeta sighed and shook his head.
"Are you together with Gale?" he asked. "I've tried to figure out, but... I can't read you. You're filled with secrets"
His question surprised me. I had to think really long for an answer. I knew that Gale liked me, but did I like him? I sighed. It was so complicated. I knew that I would have married Gale if the games didn't exist. Not much because of love, more because he was one of the few persons I liked. But the games existed, and I'd met Peeta thanks to them. I liked him, even if I shouldn't. One of us was going to die next week. Probably both of us. I knew that my promise to Prim was a lie. I was going to try to win, but I knew that Cato or Clove or Glimmer would be the death of me. If I loves Gale, he would be on my mind now. I would be grieving the fact that I'd never see him again. I wasn't. Prim was the only one that I would miss.
"I've never been in love. Me and Gale are just friends." I answered after a long moment of silence.
For a second, I thought I saw relieve on Peeta's face. Then he just smiled and poked my collarbone. His touch sent shivers down my spine.
"Your turn" he said. I raised my eyebrow and then understood that he wanted me to ask something. I smiled.
"Are you a virgin?" I asked. Normally, when sober, I would've never, ever asked this kind of a question, but now... Now I was drunk and curious. I wanted to know the boy in front of me. I wanted to understand the boy who saved my life.
Peeta looked embarrassed, and he stared at the mattress. I could see that this was an issue that he wasn't so confident about.
"Yes." he mumbled. He lifted his gaze and stared into my eyes. "Are you?"
I nodded. "Of course I am." I said, and realized that it wasn't such a clarity to Peeta. How would he know what happened in my hunting trips with Gale, or after school with the boys on my class. He didn't know that I only had two friends, and neither one of them was someone I would sleep with. The thought of kissing Madge made me giggle. The mayor would not have been so happy. Same-sex relationships were forbidden in District 12.
"Have you kissed anyone?" I asked, and Peeta smiled.
"That I have." he answered, and I felt a sting of jealousy. I didn't like the thought of Peeta kissing any other girl besides me. I knew what his next question was going to be, so before he opened his mouth I pressed my lips hard against his. His lips tasted sweet, like sugar and vanilla, and I felt like melting into his arms that now were around me. He opened his mouth and I deepened the kiss. His mouth tasted like heaven. Flavours that could only be described as 'Peeta' tickled my tongue, and I moaned. Peeta interrupted the kiss and looked at me with a curious look.
"Katniss-" ha began, but I didn't let him finish. I wanted more. A burning sensation took over and the voice in my head that was telling me to be responsible died away.
Our lips met again, and this time it was clear that just kissing wouldn't satisfy us. I felt my underwear become moist, and a hard poke at my thigh. Peeta leaned over me, and kissed me harder. He then kissed my jawline, and continued down. He sucked lightly at my neck, and then gently kissed my collarbone. He sat up, and so did I, with a wondering look. Didn't he want me? Had I done something wrong? I realized that everything was okay when Peeta grabbed my top and pulled it up. I wasn't wearing a bra, so my breast were there for him to see. I didn't feel shame, only lust. The same kind of lust that was displayed in Peeta's eyes. He took of his shirt before I had the chance to, and then attacked my lips with his own. I pulled him down on the mattress with me, and bit his lip. He moaned, and started to caress my breasts.
My head was spinning, and I could only think about Peeta's hands.
My hands touched his chest, and then continued down to his well-formed abs. I stopped at the edge of his pants. I heard his breath hitch as I started to pull them down. His erection was hard against my hand, and I couldn't help but to admire the size of it. It felt both exiting and scary.
"I want you Katniss" Peeta mumbled. I nodded, and pulled my pants down. I parted my legs, and he positioned himself between them. He touched my lower region with the tip of his erection, and smiled.
"You're so wet..." he whispered.
"Don't be a tease" I begged. "I want you inside me."
That was all it took for Peeta. He pushed himself inside me, and we both let out a loud moan. I had never felt anything so amazing. Peeta was big and filled me up, while I was tight and warm around him.

He rested his forehead on my neck, and began pushing. First it felt a bit painful, but the alcohol did numb me a bit. The funny thing was that alcohol only seemed to numb pain, while it made pleasure feel stronger.
"Peeta" I whispered. Every nerve in my body seemed to be exposed. My toes curled of pleasure, an I let out small gasps. Soon, the feeling was so overwhelming, that all I could feel was my body exploding. Not literally of course.
My eyes were closed, and I could feel Peeta still moving. He started to move faster and faster, until he collapsed on top of me. I felt something pumping inside me, but in that moment, I just didn't care.
We kissed and cuddled until the morning sun tickled our faces. When we left the roof, I knew what I had to do. Only one of us was coming home from the arena, and that person was going to be Peeta.