Annoying

Peter Lattimer sighed. He couldn't believe his partner Myka Berring had left him with the new guy. Ugh. His sense of humor was at zero watts. If Steve Jinks was faced with George Carlin, he'd probably not even know who he was. He probably found Pennywise the Clown funny. That's so creepy…
Pete sighed again, and this time Jinksy looked up at him. "What's the problem, Agent Lattimer?" he said casually.
"Nothing."
"You're lying."
"You know… that's already getting old. I feel all… not… sneaky, or whatever. You know."
"I—what?"
"Never mind," Pete said, exasperated. This kid was boring. He began bouncing the artifact, a never-fail bouncy ball that supposedly had taken out a few eyes or something. But it probably wasn't anything to worry about. Jinksy apparently thought it was. He came right over and neutralized it, looking at Pete like he was a loony.
Whatever, no-fun Newman.
Myka, why…
He got back to work with a grumble.
Maybe they could get some cookies…

Breakneck

"Don't do that!" Jinks yelled at Pete.
Pete rolled his eyes and ignored him. Tesla Skate was his invention after all. And you can't Tesla Skate without the skates and the Tesla. That's just… dumb.
Pete kept up with his target practice, firing the Tesla as he skated back and forth. He needed to perfect his balance before they could make a game out of this.
How fun would that be?
Pete's pocket buzzed. While still skating, he pulled the Farnsworth from his pocket and didn't even have the chance to open it before crashing into a shelf and falling on his ass. He groaned. "My back, butt, legs, head…"
Jinks was by his side in a second, pulling off the skates before offering him a hand up. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah."
He offered Pete a hand up. "You're an idiot, you know that?"
Pete huffed and decided to focus on Artie's call on the Farnsworth.
Jinks rolled his eyes and cleaned up Pete's mess.

^

Clearance

"What?" Jinks asked, looking at Pete incredulously. "Of course I have clearance!"
"Whoa, smokey, don't get offended."
"And why not? You just basically said I don't belong here."
"Well, I was here first!"
"Oh my God, Lattimer, you're a child!"
He stormed off. Claudia watched from where she was sitting on Artie's desk. "Pete, buddy. He's a good guy. I know I called him a poopy pants but truth is, he'll keep on being one unless you make him feel like he belongs here."
Pete giggled a bit. "You like him, don't you?"
"What? No. Pete. Honestly, hombre. You know he's gay."
Pete sighed. "Wow, he's like bleach—sapping all the color out of the room... fine. I'll apologize."
He wandered out into the warehouse and found him. "Jinksy?"
He looked up. "Yeah?"
"You definitely belong here. They don't make mistakes, not usually. I… I'm sorry I was a jerked chicken."
Steve Jinks wasn't sure what he meant, but he smiled a bit. "It's alright." He could read the sincerity on Pete's face.

^

Disarm

Pete, under influence of artifact, had drawn his gun. From his perspective, all his team members looked like velociraptors. "Oh my God!" he shouted, his fear showing a bit. "Myka, Claudia, Artie! Somebody! Help, I can't hold them off for long!"
He was about to shoot Myka, who was stepping forward fearfully to talk to him, when Jinks came up behind him and knocked the gun from his hands. He yanked the pendant from around Pete's neck as Pete swung at him. His fist connected with Jinksy's jaw and he fell, taking the pendant with him to the ground. As soon as it left Pete's neck, Pete's vision returned to normal, and he saw that he'd hit Steve.
"Jinksy, crap!" He slid down in the dirt and checked out his fellow agent.
Jinks hit him across the face.
Pete touched his face, surprised. "I thought Buddhists were supposed to be against violence!"
"For you, I'll make an exception!"
Pete stared, then laughed.
Jinks smiled, then laughed with him.

^

Epidermis

"So yeah, you're gay! I keep forgetting! You know, if you want, I could walk around the warehouse with my shirt off…"
"Oh God, please don't…"
Pete ignored him and began peeling off his college tee shirt. "I've put a lot of work into this chiseling, you know?"
"Please, oh my God, Pete, put the shirt back on." He was covering his eyes.
"What? You don't find this perfectly perfect and in all ways perfection?"
"Not really, no offense…"
"Psh." Pete pulled his shirt back down, looking grumbly. "Too late for 'no offense', Jinksy."
Jinks sighed and looked at him. "I didn't mean to offend you, Pete."
Pete huffed and turned away, but he was smiling.
"Pete, don't be like that. Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I find all guys attractive…"
Pete ho-hummed and didn't turn.
"Fine, Pete, fine. You're hot. Happy? I think you're hot."
Pete turned, a childish glee apparent on his face. "Knew it." He pulled his shirt off again.
Jinks rolled his eyes and groaned.

Filch

"Um… Pete? So I was looking for my Avengers comic and can't seem to find it…"
"What? Why are you asking me where your comic is? I have no idea."
Steve's eyes narrowed a bit. "You're lying. You know where it is. Do you know who took it?"
"No."
"No meaning yes. Is it someone who lives at the Bed and Breakfast?"
"No."
"Pete. That's a yes. Was it you, Pete? Did you take my comic book?"
"Why would I take your comic book?"
"You're diverting from the question."
"And you ask too many."
"Pete, seriously. It's mine. I'm sure you have your own. Do you have my comic book?"
He said nothing.
"Pete."
"No?"
"Give it back, please."
"But it's in better condition than my copy," Pete whined.
"Then buy yourself a new one! It's kind of weird that you stole mine—"

"Borrowed, not stole."
Steve looked him over and sighed. "Fine. Keep it."
As he left, Pete smiled a bit. He'd give it back eventually. Maybe.

Gettysburg

It had been a tough artifact search, finding a single bullet casing in all of Gettysburg. But it had been Pete's intuition that led them to a crooked collector and had eventually got them the shell. On the way back to South Dakota, Agent Jinks and Lattimer had time to talk.
"You've got quite a tuned sense, there, Agent Lattimer."
"I told you, no more Agent Lattimer. I've heard you call me Pete before, and honest-to-Betsy you can do it again." He turned and smiled a bit, though his eyes seemed far away. He then proceeded to tell Steve Jinks about his father, and the time that he'd ignored his instincts. Jinks was quiet for some time before speaking. "I once saw a man lying about his meeting with my grandfather, and didn't warn him. He shot him for a poker dispute."
Pete looked at him. "I guess we both have some mean haunts, huh?"
They were quiet the rest of the way, but felt comfortable in their confidence with one another.

Honey

"Jinks, you are not telling me that you know how to bake!"
"Yeah, actually. I find it relaxing. And I like food, so."
"Oh my God! Jinksy! We soooo have that in common!"
"Do you like cookies?"
Pete nearly fell over. "Like cookies? Like cookies? You are severely understating my true appreciation for those delicious discs of perfection!"
"Well I made honey busters. They're… a personal invention. I hope you like them."
"Honey Busters. That's so badass! They sound cuter than the sneezing panda, gimme!"
Jinks laughed a bit at his, seeing how anxious Pete was. A few weeks ago when he met him, he'd have been annoyed at his grabby hands. But lately, they'd been getting along, and he was, dare he say it, pleased that someone wanted his cookies.
Pete ate one and moaned appreciatively and got another. "You're a madh deniush," he said around the cookie.
"You're a mad genius, too, Petey," he said with a laugh.

Intrusive

"You can't just barge in here whenever you please. I'm meditating. I need silence. And you know I'll never get that around you."
"Ooh, the burn, Jinksy, the burn. Got any aloe for your fiery remarks?" he said with a smirk. "I let you in my room whenever you want." He sat on Jinks' bed with a water gun.
"It's because you want someone to play with. I have more important things to do than play cops and robbers. I put my matchbox cars in the attic. I've grown up."
"Yeah, into a crotchety old man-boy."
Jinksy's mouth dropped open. "Rude!"
Pete's mouth dropped open in mockery. "Crotchety!"
Jinks stood up and took the water gun from Pete and sprayed him in the face.
Pete jumped at him and took it back, spraying him. Jinks got a handful of water from the bathroom and splashed him.
By the end of it, they were both soaked and laughing. Later, Leena shook her head at the mess.

Jittery

Steve Jinks was sitting in the dining room, reading over his case files for the day ahead. He hadn't slept much, because he could hear Pete watching horror movies through the wall and laughing for most of the night. He was on his fourth cup of black coffee.
Pete had slept well for the few hours he'd allotted himself. He saw Jinks at the table and walked up behind him. Still motivated by the movies last night, he shouted 'Boo!'
Jinks jumped, and some coffee spilled on his leg. He yelped and stood, setting down the cup and glaring viciously at Pete. "What. The. Hell."
Before Steve attacked him, he took the cup. "Okay, okay. This is piping hot, yeah?" Steve watched curiously, and then in shock as Pete downed it quickly, the coffee burning his whole mouth.
"Ow, ow, ow. Okay, now, all my food and drink is gonna taste like crap today. We cool?"
"Why would you do that?" Steve was in shock.
"Are we cool?"
"Wow, yeah. Yeah."

Kimono

"What are you wearing?" Pete laughed, pointing.
"One, it's rude to point. Two, it's a kimono. It's traditional, and it's comfortable."
"Right, sure it is."
"Whatever, Pete. You couldn't pull one off."
"And you can?"
"Better than you could."
"Whoa there. Challenge accepted, Jet Li."
Fifteen minutes later, Pete was decked out in a green kimono with a leaf pattern and dark blue belt. "Huh? What'd you think? I'm a stud, right?"
But Jinks was on the ground laughing hysterically. It was too small for Pete's broad chest, and it was open in the front. It was tied wrong, and he looked more like an old millionaire than a traditional anything.
Pete huffed. "Whatever. I've got game no matter what kooky outfit you dress me in."
Jinks was still laughing and nodding. "Okay. If you say so."
"You win this round, Obi-wan. But I'll be back for you!" he said, trying to look menacing, but smiling nonetheless.

Loan

"So, Jinksy my man. We've officially been fellow Agents—some might even say partners—for four months now. That means I now have the complete right to borrow anything I want from you. Those are the rules."
"What? That's a stupid rule."
"Rules are rules for a reason, Jinks the minx. And I want to borrow your name."
Jinks stared at him. "Wait, what?"
"Yep. I want you and I to be fellow wingmen and go into town and pick us up some chicks… sorry. Hotties. Yeah? You get to be Petey Lattimer for an evening, and I get to be the elusive Steve Jinks."
"You're trying to sully my name, aren't you."
"What! No!"
"Yes you are. You want me to be remembered as a party animal."
"Well, you do need some work…"
Jinks smiled a bit. "You're right. Let's go then, Jinks."
"Just like that?"
"Yeah. I'm sure it'll be fun making you pay for "Pete Lattimer's" parking tickets…"
"Wait…"
"Too late!" he ran down the hall, laughing.

Map

"We're lost."
"No. No. Men don't get lost, Jinks. Remember that."
"I don't need help being a man. I'm very much one already."
"I didn't… we're not lost, okay? The map is wrong, we're double rainbow all the way."
"I don't even know why we're out here. You weren't very clear about what we're doing…"
"Um, comic-con? You know you want to go to comic conventions, don't play me, Jinksy!"
Steve laughed a bit. "I read them casually. The stories are interesting, yes. But it doesn't mean I know anything about comics."
"Then it's time you learned!"
He laughed again. "If you say so. But you're paying my entrance fee."
"Deal. You can get us food later or something."
"Fine by me." Jinks sat back and read the map. "Oh! Turn here! This is it, this is it."
Pete smiled and turned down the street, reveling in the crowds. "Awesome."

Nibble

"Whoa, this place is nice," Pete said as he entered the Japanese hibachi place. "Is this the kind of place where they do the flippy-food-thingy right in front of you?"
"If you mean where they cook your meal in front of you, along with added theatrics for entertainment purposes, then yes."
"I like "flippy-food-thingy" better. Yours sounds too up-turny-nosey."
Steve Jinks smiled. "Fair enough."
"Oh man, I've always wanted to come to a place like this! Have you been here before?"
"Yeah, once or twice. I don't really like eating alone though, so not that often."
"Hey, hey, hey, I'll come anytime you want, my man!"
They were seated, and Pete's face lit up as he watched their chef make their meals. The chef tossed a piece of chicken in the air and Pete caught it in his mouth. Jinksy missed his first one, but caught the next.
"We should come again," Pete said, smiling at Jinks as they left.
"Yeah," he replied, smiling back.

Opposites

"Red or blue?"
"Blue."
"No way, red is better."
"Okay, Jinksyminxy. Red is so angry though…"
Pete smirked at the face Jinks made. "Look at your face right now, Jinks, you'll see what I mean. You're red and angry at the very same time."
That made Steve Jinks laugh for some reason, and he sat down across the table from Pete. "Okay, another one. Oranges or apples?"
"Oranges."
"No way. Pete. Come on. Apples. You can make anything with apples. Oranges are so—"

"Delicious?" Pete interrupted, laughing.
"Well, yeah, okay, they're delicious, but you can't make an orange pie. Or an orange turnover. Without taking ten thousand other steps that you could avoid by using delicious apples instead."
"Let me ask you one, then."
"Okay?"
"Pete or Myka?"
"What? I like you both, you know I can't pick—"

"For sweet, sweet macking, I mean. Me? Or Myka?"
"Trick question?"
"Nah."
"Then you. Because you're a dude."
"Is that all?"
"…yeah." He thought so, anyway.
"Alright," Pete said, smiling a bit.

Princess

"If you could be any Disney prince, who would you be?"
"Belle," Pete answered, not even wavering.
"Okay… that's. Okay, Belle's not a prince…"
"Oh! You said prince? Um… Prince… Charming?"
"Too late to cover your tracks, Petey. You wish you were Belle," he said with a smirk.
"No, no, no, you're reading into that wayyy too far, pretty boy. I wanted to be like Belle. But like, instead of all those regular Myka-like books, shelves and shelves of autographed editions of comic books. Also I bet it's totally awesome having talking dishes. Though I'd feel bad if I broke one…"
Jinks was laughing, but nodding. "That would be kind of cool. And I thought that footstool dog was adorable."
"Oh my God I know right?" Pete gushed a bit. "I'd love to have him. I'd call him Ikea."
Jinks laughed. "Now that I think of it, I'd rather be Belle than Prince Charming."

Quarantine

"Five days? I don't even have a TV in here, I'll go crazy!" Pete called through the Plexiglas encasement around him.
"Pete, you've been through worse. And you have Jinks to keep you company so stop complaining." Artie sauntered off. Claudia followed after sticking her tongue out. Myka looked worried, but followed as well.
Pete sighed and smacked the box that had encased he and Jinks when he accidentally knocked over a vase that lowered inhibitions. If allowed into the populace, it would cause mayhem. So they trapped Pete and Jinks in here to keep them from contaminating the world.
Pete turned and sat next to Jinks on the floor. "Five days, huh?"
Steve nodded. "Yeah. You lied about going crazy."
"What?"
"Does it bug you being trapped in here?"
"Yes."
"Lie."
Pete looked at him curiously. "No."
"Why?"
"Because I'm with you."
Jinks looked at him, then leaned over and kissed Pete softly. Pete's eyes went wide, but he kissed back after a moment, touching Jinks' cheek and closing his eyes.

Regret?

"We should talk about what happened—"

"Or, what would be better, is if we pretend it didn't happen. It didn't happen."
"Pete, it's just me, okay? It's Jinksy. I'm not calling you out. I just feel like we should discuss—"

"No, Jinksy, we shouldn't!"
Jinks grabbed Pete's arms and looked him in the eye. "Then tell me you didn't enjoy it. Tell me you hated it, tell me you hate me, tell me you don't want it to happen again."
"I didn't enjoy it. I hated it. I hate you. I don't want it to happen again."
Jinks watched him. He smiled. He leaned in and kissed him warmly, pulling him close, biting at his lip. Pete whimpered a bit and his eyes closed, wrapping his arms around him and returning the kiss hungrily. At last Jinks pulled back. "You lie a lot, you know."
"Yeah. I used to get away with it, too," he said with a smile, kissing him again.

Spying

Pete and Jinks were in the dining room, and Leena was watching them casually from the kitchen. They were talking and laughing together, and she smiled. Pete's aura was glowing brighter than usual, and she hummed knowingly.
"Hey Leena, what's shaking?" Claudia asked, and Leena shushed her. She pointed at the men in the other room. Claudia looked, then looked back at Leena. "So? It's Pete and Jinks—oh! Oh!" she looked again, covering her mouth and watching them with wide eyes. "Pete and Jinks? Really?"
Leena nodded and smiled. "I've been watching them for the last fifteen minutes. They both seem really happy with one another."
"Leena, you dog. I never knew you were a voyeur," Claudia said with a smirk, glancing back at her.
"We're all unusual in our own special ways, Claudia."
Claudia laughed and went and got some orange juice.

Pete and Jinks didn't notice a thing.

Truth

"Truth or Dare."
"No way. It's no fun playing Truth with you, Jinksy."
"Alright." Steve Jinks sat down next to Pete on the couch in the living room and tossed his legs over Pete's lap. "Dare or Dare."
Pete smirked a bit and ran his hand along Steve's legs. "Dare seems to be the choice for me."
"I dare you to kiss me."
"You don't have to dare me. I'm glad to." He leaned in and cupped Steve's cheek, kissing him softly before pulling back with a smile. "Dare or Dare, Jinksy-poo."
"Don't call me that," he said with a smile. "Dare."
"Kiss me."
Jinks smiled and sat up, straddling Pete's lap and putting his arms around him, kissing him hard. Pete moaned softly and stroked his back and sides, kissing back deeply.
Jinks finally broke away and kissed Pete's nose, smiling at him. "You're amazing, Petey."
"Don't call me that," he said, smiling. "And so are you."

Ursa Major

Pete sat on a blanket out in the empty land that surrounded the Warehouse. Jinks sat between his knees, leaning back on him. Pete pointed up. "Orion."
"I know that one," Jinks smiled.
"North Star."
"I know that one too."
"Aren't you just a genius, Minxy." He smiled and kissed below Jinks' ear. "How about Ursa Major?"
"Nope, I don't know that one."
Pete pointed it out with a smile. "The bigger bear. Rowr."
Jinks laughed and turned a bit, catching Pete's lips in his own. "You know a lot about astronomy."
"I used to go stargazing with my father."
Jinks frowned slightly at the mention of his father, but kissed Pete's cheek. "It's really special that you brought me out here then."
"There's no one else I'd take with me. I'm, I'm crazy about you, Jinksy."
He smiled brightly. "I'm crazy about you, Petey."
"Funny how that works," he said with a smile.

Venture

"You're a child sometimes, you know that?"
"So you've mentioned. But you're snooty sometimes."
"True," Jinks agreed. "But I'm so terribly good at it."
Pete smiled and cuddled with him as they watched TV. "So, Jinks…"
He looked at him. "Yeah?"
"Well, we've, we've been doing this, whatever this is, for five months now. Five months of holding hands and kissing and whatnot. I feel, that after that amount of time, that I'm comfortable now. Being with you, you know, publicly."
Jinks' eyes opened wide. He'd brought it up once or twice, and it usually led to an argument, so he'd let it slide for a while. And here Pete was, suggesting they be official. Was this for real? But a quick read of Pete's face showed the truth of his words. Jinks' heart did flip-flops, and he smiled. "Yes. God, yes."
Pete smiled, still nervous. "You're more than worth it."
"I believe you."

Worry

"You said you wanted to meet my family!"
"Steve, it's not that I don't, but I just came out to my friends last week, I'm still scared, okay? I mean you've had years to figure out who you are. This is all new to me!"
"You promised, though!"
"God, yes, I know! And I promise I will! But does it have to be now?"
"Listen to me, Pete," Jinks said calmly. "I'm not trying to make it hard on you, but you're braver than you think. You've come out to Myka and Leena and Artie and Claudia already. They know, and they love you no less for it. And these are my hippie parents I'm introducing you to. They are completely okay with love in any form it takes. I'm not asking you to stand in Times Square and tell the world. I'm asking you to trust that I… I love you, Pete."
He'd never said that before. "I love you, too," Pete replied softly. "Let's meet the family then. I can do this."

Xmas

The team was celebrating Christmas together at the bed and breakfast. They'd all gotten one another gifts. Pete opened his gift from Jinks. "This… this is the first Creeper comic! Mint, oh wow…" his eyes were wide as he took it in. "This is so great, Jinksy!" He leaned over and pecked him on the cheek, which made Claudia giggle into her hand, Leena smile sweetly, Myka stare and Artie poke at his gifts curiously, as he wasn't paying attention.
Pete handed Jinks a small box with a little green bow on top. "Here's yours," he said. "I have gift giving anxiety. I hope this is good enough."
"I'm sure it's perfect." Jinks smiled and opened it. It was a key on green ribbon. "What is it?"
"The key to our apartment in town."
Jinks' eyes lit up. "Our… you got us… Pete, oh my God…" he hopped over and hugged him tightly, kissing him, which made Claudia and Leena smile, and Myka stare, and Artie poke his gifts. As he wasn't paying attention.

Youth

Agents Lattimer and Jinks had been together for seven years. They'd slipped over the border and exchanged vows two months ago, and though they might not be entirely legal, they were real enough for them, at least for now. The work at the Warehouse had made them look and feel older than they were, but in their hearts, they were still as spritely and happy and in love as they had ever been.
Pete sat with Jinks on the balcony overlooking the expansive Warehouse. "I'm never gonna get sick of this place. I mean, there have been definite times when I doubted my place here. How dangerous it is. How many times I've almost lost Myka and Artie and Claudia… the far too many times I've almost lost you."
"Don't focus on that, Pete," he said, taking the other man's hand. "It's been rough, yeah. But life is like that. It's about the present, and the unpredictable future."
"I hope the future is just as good as the present."
"It'll be better, love. Promise."

Zenith

Pete felt the tears spill down his cheeks as he smiled brighter than he'd smiled in years. Could it be true? After twenty years of being together, after twenty years of hoping and praying for the world to not be so cruel. South Dakota had passed a bill allowing same-sex marriage.
Jinks was sobbing and had buried his face in Pete's shirt, clinging to him. "I love you, Pete, I love you. We've made it, we've made it, God."
Pete nodded, still unable to speak. He stroked Jinks' back and cried openly. When he could finally speak, he kissed Jinks' forehead. "Yeah, buddy. We did it."
In no time at all, their wedding bands were recognized as official, and they let the world know that they were each other's. After all this time, after all the things they'd seen in the Warehouse. This was their biggest feat. And they'd made it.