So, I was up till 1:30 this morning doing this. Every time I tried to stop it would haunt my thoughts until I started writing again...I think it was worth it! Reviews are always awesome!
Disclaimer: *looks left* *looks right* ...still don't own Glee...Damn
Clutching his hands over his chest, Kurt laid in his bed and tried to not shatter into a million pieces. Blaine had just announced his Gap Attack, "More like Kurt's heart-attack" he muttered to himself, cringing at how stupid that sentence had sounded, but not really caring. It got the message across.
He had been laying there, thinking, since the announcement was made, twelve hours ago. Since it was announced on the last meeting of the week, Kurt was free to mope without interruption. Though, he wasn't moping, he was simply trying not to break. In his sadness, he felt so fragile, as if a simple spring breeze could shatter him. At times like this, be reveled in rooming alone. Preferring to not talk in his depressed states, unless Mercedes wanted to comfort him.
Over the last two hours, Kurt had decided that he would not be joining the other warblers on the attack, even if it meant his discharge from the club. No matter how it hurt Blaine, he could not subject himself to that emotional torture, willingly.
Holding his breath as yet another set of feet padded their way down the hall towards his dorm, Kurt couldn't help but hope that it was Blaine coming to see what was wrong. Though, just like every other time, the noise continued uninterrupted past his room, crushing Kurt yet again. He told himself repeatedly that Blaine wouldn't come, because he would be so worried about how his "Big Shot 50% off Marital Bonus Manager" would react to his singing. Kurt could help but sound snarky and venomous, but he felt obliged under the circumstances.
Hearing his phone buzz under his pillows, he sighed, and dug it out. About to blow off whoever it was, Kurt saw it was Mercedes.
Hey babe, whats up? ~M
Nothing. ~K
Kurt put the phone down on his chest to await a reply. He wasn't lying, nothing was going on, so he couldn't feel bad about anything, right?
Somethings wrong, I'm coming to Dalton. Be there in 10 ~M
How she could tell something was wrong by one text is a true testament to their friendship. The ride from Mercedes house to Dalton is thirty minutes but she reserved her "speed demon" tactics for times like this, so she got to Dalton in seven minutes.
Opening the door quietly in a very un-Mercedes like way, she stepped in and just as quietly, shut the door. Walking over and sitting in Kurt's computer chair, Mercedes got a good look at her best friend. He was laying with his eyes trained on some far off scene, his arms ensnaring his body and clutching opposite sides, as if trying to hold himself together.
Taking off her shoes, she climbed into his bed and wrapped her arms around him, "Oh, Kurt. Please tell me whats wrong." A tear escaped to run free down her cheek, she had never seen Kurt so utterly defeated, even after they talked about the Karofsky incident.
"Yes?" he said, his voice devoid of any emotion.
"Honey, whats wrong?" Kurt decided to tell her,
"Blaine, decided to sing to someone for Valentines day." Mercedes eyes lit with realization,
"Oh...I'm really, truly sorry Kurt." Was all she could offer, knowing nothing would make him feel better.
"It's okay, I will be fine in the end, right?" Mercedes nodded her head.
"Alright, so who will be the victim of Santana's hair blades?" Kurt chuckled, a weak, throaty sound,
"The Gap store manager."
"Oh, that damn 50% marital discount?"
"Yeah." Mercedes mulled it over for a second,
"Hey, he is going to sing the manager a song right?" Kurt nodded, "So why don't you sing for Blaine, since talking is out of the question. You must have a song in mind." Kurt nodded yet again, before sitting up against the wall,
"Call Quinn, Rachel, and Tina. Get them to your house as soon as possible. At the meeting after the Attack, I will fill you in on the way, we will serenade mister Blaine Warbler." Kurt had to grab himself tighter as he said Blaine's name.
The room was silent as Wes's gavel collided with the table, "Well, we all know the outcome of this weekend's Attack. Blaine, he wasn't good enough for you, and may I ask, where the hell is Junior Warbler Kurt?" Kurt's name seemed to register with Blaine, he swiveled his head around, just now noticing Kurt's absence. Wes had just stifled a sigh as a voice echoed throughout the room,
"I'm right here." Kurt announced as he walked in, trailed by Mercedes, Quinn, Tina, and Rachel. Wes was furious,
"Kurt I hope you know that bringing them into this meeting is a violation of Warbler conduct, and furthermore, being out of uniform during a Warbler meeting is strictly prohibited. Also, where were you during the Atta-" Kurt cut him off right there,
"Wes, I know all of those things, and I was busy preparing this with help from my Girls from the New Directions. Can we please have the floor?" Wes had a heated internal argument until David punched him on the shoulder.
"Fine." Wes consented, rubbing his shoulder.
"I think everyone here know who this song goes out too. This particular individual had been very oblivious lately, mostly having to do with me, and hopefully this will help wake him up."
Blaine had been paying attention only subconsciously, but focused his full attention on Kurt as Quinn pressed play on a iPod and the song that Kurt had been listening too for the past two weeks, nonstop, poured out. Kurt began singing, with a unnatural amount of pain and heartbreak in his voice.
I never needed you to be strong
I never needed you for pointin' out my wrongs
I never needed pain, I never needed strain
My love for you was strong enough you should've known.
Kurt stared directly at Blaine as he sang, the four girls overlapping in the background.
I never needed you for judgment
I never needed you to question what I spent
I never ask for help, I take care of myself, I don't know why you think you got a hold on me.
Blaine realized he had assumed that Kurt would just go along with whatever he decided to do, he felt the shame coming on.
And it's a little late for conversations
There isn't anything that you can say.
And my eyes hurt, hands shiver, so look at me , listen to me because,
Kurt let his emotions overpower his whole body and his vulnerability show through in his voice. Patronizing Blaine for how he made him feel.
I don't want to
Stay another minute
I don't want you
To say a single word
Hush Hush, Hush Hush
There is no other way
I get the final say
Because
I don't want to
Do this any longer
I don't want you
There's nothing left to say
Hush Hush, Hush Hush
I've already spoken
Our love is broken
Baby Hush Hush
Singing with all his might, Kurt tried to hold back tears. Blaine on the other hand, just didn't care enough anymore to hold his tears back. He was so upset at how he made Kurt feel. Though, he didn't dare try to leave.
No more words
Blaine knew that no words could fix this.
No more lies
Never had he lied to Kurt and he never would.
No more crying
He never wanted to see Kurt cry
No more pain
Kurt had been through pain.
No more hurt
He had hurt so bad inside.
No more tryin'
But he would never stop trying.
Yeah, Oh
Hush Hush, Hush Hush
I've already spoken
Our love is broken
Baby
Kurt finished the song, grabbed his iPod, and ushered the girls out to walk them to their cars, each one of them in their own level of hysterics. Though, none of them could drowned out the heart wrenching sobs coming from the Warbler's room.
The next day, Kurt was laying on his bed, staring up at his ceiling. A slew of Warblers had been to see him, none of them the one he was hoping for. They each had some condolence for him. Kurt just shrugged it off,
"It needed to be said." he told each one of them.
Around two thirty, there was a knock on his door. Kurt could tell Blaine was on the other side of it. Whenever Blaine was a remote distance from him, he could feel it,
"Yes?"
"It...It's me. C-can I come inside?" Kurt scoffed,
"Of coarse! Why couldn't you?"
The door opened ever so slowly, to reveal a red eyed, sniffling, new tears threatening to fall down his face, Blaine. Kurt immediately opened his arms and stood up,
"Come here." He murmured. That was all Blaine needed.
He ran and threw himself into Kurt's waiting arms, sobbing hysterically.
"Kurt, I'm so sorry." Blaine must have repeated this phrase a million times, and each time Kurt told him it was okay.
When the crying on both parts finally stopped. Kurt held Blaine close to him. He reveled in the moment, and pulled away, both his hands on Blaine's shoulders, staring right in his eyes. Once he was sure he had his full attention, Kurt uttered the words that changed their lives forever.
"I love you. Now and forever. Till the ends of time, and nothing could ever change that."
The song is Hush, Hush by The Pussycat Dolls, one of my personal favorites. I also adore the version by 소녀시대 (Girls' Generation). Both are amazing. Check them out!