AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh wow. This is a random idea I got one day, watching Iron Chef. It's weird, quirky, and AMAZING!

Note: Pre-Alabasta, Post-Drum. Just so you know. :-D

ALLEZ-CUISINE!!!!

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

"Naa, Sanji I'm hungry..."

It was a fairly average day on the Going Merry.

"Shut up and wait like everyone else!"

Luffy was hungry, Sanji was cooking, Zoro was taking a nap, Usopp was telling an enthralled Chopper about the time he took on a Sea King and narrowly escaped alive, and Vivi and Nami were both sunbathing.

"Sanjii Are you sure it isn't done yet? It smells so good"

Sanji poked his head angrily out of the kitchen. "What are you talking about, Luffy?! I'm just chopping up the ingredients!"

"But, the ingredients smell so good! It's making me hungry"

Sanji glared at him. "Go sit at the bow! I'll never finish with lunch if you keep on complaining!"

With a pout, Luffy walked to the front of the ship. His stomach was growling, and he smelled food… he smelled meat… Luffy was hungry.

"Oi! Sanji!"

Sanji felt a vein pop in his head.

"Is lunch almost ready?"

"WHAT DID I JUST FINISH TELLING LUFFY, DUMBASS?! NO! And if you don't leave me alone, it will NEVER be ready!!"

"But Sanji, what's that great smell then?"

"Damned if I know! Go bother somebody else, Usopp!"

Jeez, what was the problem with everybody today? He'd be done when he was done. Was it that hard to understand?

"He-hey! Look! Land!" Luffy cried out excitedly.

Nami sat up. "What? I don't remember…"

"Look! Look! It's so coooool! Let's go there! Naa! Naa!"

Nami was already on her way to the bow. "Usopp. Look at that island over there. What does it look like?"

Usopp turned his head. "Huh? Uh…" He adjusted his goggles, squinting ahead. "Well, it's an island, all right. But it's a small one. Only a few houses, it looks like. And… is that a Coliseum?!"

Nami twitched. Gods of Money save her, there was no way they'd be able to steer around now.

"A COLISEUM?!?! COOOOOOL!!!" Luffy was so excited, he'd forgotten all about being hungry. "They probably use it for battles between the best chefs in the world; whoever makes the most meat wins!"

"LIKE THAT WOULD EVER HAPPEN!" Nami and Usopp cried, smacking Luffy in the head.

"Less'gothearr…" Luffy said, swaying and clutching at his head.

Nami sighed. "It'd be a good opportunity to rest, Nami-san." Vivi added.

Nami knew there was no avoiding it; Luffy had made up his mind, Usopp was eager for a change in scenery, and Chopper probably wanted to see if they had any medical books. Besides that, they were running low on supplies, so it was a good opportunity.

"Just don't get lost." She warned. It would be just like them to have to stay for a week because Luffy had gotten himself into trouble. "And Luffy and Zoro can't enter the coliseum without myself or Sanji." In fact, they were the only two who could contain the unlucky streaks of their captain and first mate. Chopper and Vivi were too weak, and nobody listened to Usopp.

"Yosha!!" cried both Luffy and Usopp. "SANJI! Come with me to the Coliseum, okay?!" Luffy called.

"I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP….wait. Coliseum?" Sanji cast a confused glance to Nami. "What is he talking about, Nami-swan?"

Nami merely threw her thumb over her shoulder. She was already regretting the decision to dock here.

Sanji advanced confusedly towards the bow. "Wait… is that an island?"

"Looks like it; there's not supposed to be a military base here."

Nami could see Sanji's eyebrow crease in concentration. "Yeah, Luffy, I'll go with you to the Stadium."

"ALL RIGHT!!!!" Luffy shouted, jumping into the air with a fist.

"Oh… hey, Sanji, I'm coming along too!" Usopp interjected, not wanting to be left out. "I wanna see this coliseum."

"Yeah, me too, me too!" Chopper added excitedly.

"Okay, sure… just don't get in my way."

"Sanji-kun," Nami said slowly, "Why do you want to go to this Stadium?"

"Just curious," He said nonchalantly, but Nami was suspicious. He was the one who called it a Stadium. Almost as if he'd heard of it…

Nami shook this idea off as Luffy, Usopp and Chopper were all dancing excitedly about seeing the 'cool coliseum'. "HEY! No slacking! We need to get ready to dock! Luffy, bring in the sails, Usopp, help him; Chopper, get ready to drop the anchor! We're going to land!"

"Hai!" the crew intoned, quickly setting to work. Sanji turned around to head back into the kitchen. He had to prepare.

"Sanji-kun," Nami interrupted. The cook turned back around, his eyes filled with hearts.

"Yes, Namiswaan?"

"Who said that structure was a stadium?" She asked suspiciously. Sanji seemed a bit too familiar with the island.