Max:
I love you. The way I feel about you scares me, honestly, because I know I place too much importance on our interactions, especially because I suspect that I'm just another one of your games- another girl that only holds your interest because you think you can't have me. Or at least because I act like you can't. If you knew how I felt, would you lose interest? At the end of the day, when everything is low, you're what makes me hold on, you're what makes me smile when all I can see is bleakness all around me. I hate you for having this effect on me. I hate you because I love you. And one day, when you disappear from my life, probably without warning, I'll hate you because the spark that's left inside me might die out. So much has had an effect on me that I hate you for being the one bright point in my life. Because a single point is fragile, and can go out at any time. I hate you as much as I love you, and I don't know what I want. I know I can't let myself say what I want, because even if we both felt the same way, it would never work, and then we'd be over anyway. But if I wait around, if I just keep hiding what I'm feeling for you, what the hell am I going to do when you finally find someone? Because I know you. And I know that you are kind and thoughtful as much as you try to hide it, and what girl doesn't want you? So I wonder. What will I do when you do find someone? Because that will probably mean the end to what we have, whatever that is, anyway. I know that years from now, your name will just be a small reminder of some guy that I was in love with once, and I might smile as I think of you and then move on to whatever I was doing before that, but I don't want that. I want everything to freeze in time until I figure out what the hell I want. Because all I know is that I don't want to lose you. And I have to figure out how not to do that. And that will take time. Because in the end, who don't you lose?
-Me
Glad to get that out of her system, she crumpled up the note and tossed it in the garbage. Looking around her office one last time, she turned off the lights and locked the door behind her. That night she would board a plane to Europe and that was the end of that. Her career would go on, and her life would follow. As her high heels clicked down the corridors of N-Tek one last time, she was unaware of a young man turning off stealth mode and reaching into the garbage can.