Disclaimer: I don't own Monk. In case you can't figure this out this is a drabble
Someone once asked me why I talk with so much confidence yet I doubt myself sometimes. I suppose that's not abnormal. Most people doubt themselves at times. For most people though it's easier. I feel sometimes like I've come in, in the middle of a TV show or a movie and have no way of knowing what is going on. It will be a long time before I fully understand but acting as if I understand makes me feel smarter. Sometimes someone will look at me approvingly with a smile. Most of the time they'll look at me and say "yes I know that" and give me a look like don't talk when you don't know what you're talking about or why are you telling me what I already know. I know I'm not dumb. I know I'm pretty smart. I wish I could convince other people of that. My friends love me I know that but they're all better than me. Sometimes it feels like there is this secret club that I don't belong to. I know it's nobody's fault but I just wish I belonged. It sort of sucks not to belong but at least I can pretend I do.