Coming Home To You
Notes: Sequel to: Never Let you Go.
Written for Heather Peters in the Lunchbox group's hiatus gift exchange. This is the first chapter, I hope you enjoy!
Summary: Dealing with emotions at Christmas time would always be hard for Red, but this year he had something new to help him deal with the pain, his Lizzie.
The only sounds piercing though the silence of the night were the crunch of Red's shoes on the snow, the icy whisper of the wind, and his own breathing. He loathed this weather with a passion. Turning up his collar, he sank deeper into his coat in an unsuccessful attempt to hide from the cold and the unwelcomed images which threatened to crush down on him unasked. Would this ever fade? Would there ever come a time when he wasn't reminded? When he didn't remember?
He crossed the parking lot and nodded to the night porter when he entered the entrance hall of the apartment complex right at Quantico Creek. The building was heavily secured with surveillance and manpower, most of them Red's own associates. Red owned the entire building but he let Liz believe it was just the apartment on the fourth floor. It was the apartment Red had bought for them a couple of weeks ago, after they had come together.
Liz had started her new assignment at the FBI, teaching at Quantico, and the apartment was right in the neighborhood. She had been welcomed back with a lot more warmth than she had imagined and it had helped a great deal in acclimating faster. Her relationship with Red was still very raw and new, though, as he'd been away on "business trips" most of the time, but the sooner he could unwind his affairs the sooner he could stay with her entirely.
He exited the elevator and opened the door to their apartment. He was home early and he intended to surprise Liz, who wouldn't be expecting him for another few days. It was late, after midnight, and Liz was probably already asleep. As quietly as possible, he hung up his coat in the wardrobe without turning on the lights, and then he suddenly felt something rubbing against his legs and purring.
"Meow."
Surprised, he looked down. The street lights illuminated the corridor and he could make out a small shadow that pressed itself against his legs all over again.
"Spoone! What are you doing here?"
He bent down to scratch the cat behind its ears and the purring grew louder. Giving a soft, satisfied purr-grunt before flopping onto its back and curling its paws around his hands, Spoone tried to play with him. It was being nice and keeping its claws in, and Red laughed in a low voice and felt an odd sense of contentment.
"I've missed you too, you little rascal."
Spoone then got up, turned, and ran ahead to the living room, but stopped at the door to look back at Red as if beckoning him to follow.
Red followed him slowly and switched on the lights in the living room. Spoone jumped up the new scratching post, curled up in the carpeted bed on top, and watched him closely.
Stunned, Red looked around. Apparently Liz had raided his Bethesda apartment and had not only brought Spoone over to this new apartment, but also a shelf holding his favorite books, the old floor lamp, and the record player. His photographs decorated the mantelpiece and his paintings the walls. It looked like Donald had also kept his promise to release Liz's belongings from evidence since the Sorrento music box was placed on a side table and the white stuffed bunny resided on the couch.
What startled him the most though, was the fact that Liz had finished decorating the living room for Christmas already. It was still another week till Christmas, but she had bought a tree, decorated it with bright, beautiful, and colorful ornaments and lights. At the top of the tree sat a glowing angel and piled under the tree were many presents, all wrapped with care. Stockings were hung by the chimney, candles arranged everywhere. The smell of the fir needles, apples, cinnamon, and cookies filled the room.
Triggered by the mere thoughts of Christmas, Red readied himself for fresh surges of horror; for the flashes of blood and destruction. He braced himself for the nausea that came with the memory of loss and pain, but then he was more than a little taken aback by how these emotions failed to appear in their usual force and fierceness this time.
After collecting himself, he looked at Spoone, who immediately rolled onto its back and drew up its paws, purring like a sewing machine. Red scratched Spoone's belly and fought the lump in his throat. She'd clearly done all this for him. Her thoughtfulness and the sentiment of making this a home for him by bringing over his belongings touched him deeply and settled over him like a healing blanket. The pure thought of her kept his inner demons at bay and chased away the images of the dreadful Christmas twenty-seven years ago. Tears welled up in his eyes when he looked around once more, overwhelmed by his love and need for this woman.
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Red found Liz sleeping on his side of the bed, curled up around his pillow. She sighed and pressed herself deeper into it unconsciously; probably, hopefully, dreaming of holding him against her. His heart swelled and ached at the sight of her, and he longed to hold and to feel her too.
He silently dressed down to his boxer shorts and carefully moved into the bed, spooning behind her, pressing himself gently against her warm back. When he wrapped his arm protectively over her hip and belly and buried his nose into the soft valley of her neck to breathe her in, she woke up.
She immediately sensed his presence behind her, his smell and his touch so unique and recognizable.
"Red."
"Mmm."
He placed feather-light kisses along her throat, lingering there just to feel her. She closed her eyes at the sensation of his hot breath on her bare skin, but reluctantly pulled away from him and turned around to face him when his body wouldn't stop its trembling.
"Red, are you alright?"
Worried, she turned again to switch on the bedside lamp to be able to see him clearly. Pulling the covers off him, she inspected his torso.
"Are you sick? Injured? Hurt?"
Her troubled face made his heart clench for her again. He couldn't remember when last someone had cared about him this way: so much.
"I'm fine, sweetheart. I'm perfectly fine. Just a little overwhelmed to have you in my arms again."
She sighed in relief and snuggled back against him straightaway, holding him tight. It was true, their newly formed intimacy and closeness was still breathtaking and felt as thrilling as the first time.
"Did you found the man in Johannesburg? The one who put the bounty on your head?"
"Yes, and that threat is gone, Lizzie. That's why I'm back early."
"How long can you stay?"
"A little longer this time."
She looked at him, her expression still concerned, but then it softened all at once.
"I'm glad… I've missed you, Red. I've missed you so much…"
She closed her eyes in despair, actually fighting tears.
"I know I shouldn't worry so much about you when you're gone, but I love you and I don't want to lose you. I'm just always so afraid now that I finally have you. I'm sorry…"
He sighed and kissed her forehead.
"Lizzie, look at me… please…"
The intense look she was presented with when she finally looked up nearly melted her insides. He brought his face closer to hers as her breath hitched.
"I've missed you too; you wouldn't believe how much, sweetheart. I promise I'll always come back to you. Always. I'm just so sorry you have to put your life on hold for me like that. That you have to wait for me to end and seal my criminal path. You deserve so much more and so much better."
"Oh, stop this same old story, Reddington! I thought we were past this."
She playfully slapped him and sniffled.
"When will you accept–"
Red didn't give her time to finish her sentence; to let her scold him. He pulled her face in for a kiss and their lips finally met, greeting each other with the warmth and affection only lovers shared. They kissed each other for a long time. His hands captured her waist while her fingers were busy playing with his chest hair.
He rolled onto his back then, tugging her along and settled her on top of him. He needed her closer; needed to feel more of her. They clung to each other for dear life, no one ready to lose hold of the other any time soon.
"Thank you for bringing Spoone to this place and some of my belongings. It means a lot."
"I want you to feel safe, connected, and comfortable here, and not only because of me."
"It makes me very happy, Lizzie."
He squeezed his arms around her even more closely, if that was at all possible.
"And how's your teaching going?"
"It's fun. My students listen to me closely on everything we have on William Bradford Bishop, Jr., Jason Derek Brown, and even Semion Mogilevich. But when it comes to Raymond Reddington, they say I'm terribly biased. Now, why would they say that?"
Liz laughed wholeheartedly and Red chuckled with her.
"Because you're in love with him"
"Mmm, am I?"
Liz searched his mouth for another kiss and started a seductive exploration, testing and searching for just the right angle to fit more fully against him. He moved his lips against hers in return, matching the gentle suction and caress of her mouth with his own. Sparks shot through their veins when the kiss grew more heated and hungry, building a greater need in both of them.
When she withdrew, he met her gaze. Her eyes smoky with desire and dark with passion.
She wanted all of him.
He wanted all of her.
Right now.
TBC