i dont own anything, everything belongs to DC
As Damian walked through the halls of the manor, he was lost in his thoughts. He had been benched from patrol since the night before for not following Batman's orders and putting their lives in danger for doing so. His father had yelled at him after they had gotten home, and his words had been repeating inside his head.
flashback*
Batman got out if the batmobile and slammed the door in anger, making Robin flinch. Batman took off his cowl rather roughly and turned to face his son, walking towards him. "I told you to stay put and not engage in a fight until you were told to! Why do you have to be so difficult, Damian? Why can't you just be obedient? Sometimes I wonder if you are worthy of the Robin mantle. Yes, you have skill, but you don't know how to follow orders or work as a team!"
Damian wanted to hide as his father yelled at him. Each word his father said made his heart hurt. He had tears welling up in his eyes that wanted to spill.
"What is wrong with you, Damian? I have never had so much trouble with a protogé as I have with you! You never obey, you always do what you want and expect me to be happy with the way you do things! If you won't do as I say, then maybe you shouldn't be Robin! No patrol for 2 weeks! Go take a shower and go to bed!" Bruce finished yelling at Damian and he turned around and walked towards the batcomputer.
The little boy wanted to cry. If his father didn't need Robin, then does that mean that his father didn't want him?
end of flashback*
The words had struck Damian like a lightning bolt, making his little heart ache. He thought his father wanted him, but he guessed wrong. Robin was the only thing that allowed him to stay at Father's home. Mother had left him here because she no longer needed him, and if Father didn't need him either, then where was he supposed to go?
Damian walked back to his bedroom to take a shower and go to bed. It was almost midnight and his father had left for patrol a few hours ago.
He entered hisroom, grabbed his pajamas, and entered the bathroom connected to his bedroom. He stripped and got in the shower, turning on the warm water to help him relax. After a while of just standing in the warm water, he started to wash hinself. Once he was done, he hopped out, dried and dressed himself.
Damian then started to brush his teeth and when he was done, he washed his face and looked in the mirror, and what he saw was disgusting. He saw himself, a dissapointment, someone who can never do anything right. Someone unloved and so worthless that even his own mother abandoned him. An unworthy, selfish, unloved assassin is what he saw in the mirror.
The boy looked away from the mirror and got out of the bathroom. Titus looked up from where he was laying on the ground as Damian exited the bathroom. He turned off the lights and got in his bed before calling Titus over.
"Titus, come here boy!" Titus hopped up on the bed and layed down next to his owner and put his head on the boy's stomach. The boy then started to pet the dog and started talking to the dog.
"I wish I could be worthy of being my father's son. But how can I if my own mother thinks i'm not good enough? I am nothing but a foolish dissapointment getting in the way. A burden that disturbs everyone. A selfish human being that can't do anything corectly."
Saying what he thought of himself to the dog made him want to cry. But he can't cry because what it's a weakness, and he might get punished if he was heard doing so. At least that is how his mother raised him to think.
Bruce was barely about to check on the boy, ready to knock on the door when he heard his son start talking to his dog.
He stood outside the door and heard everything his son thought of himself. Every single word he said made Bruce's heart burn. Did Damian really think that he was a burden? That he was getting in everyone's way? Bruce felt terrible before, but now he feels like a monster for yelling at his son when he was only trying to proove that he was worthy of the Robin mantle.
The man stood there thinking of how horrible he had been to his boy, but his thoughts were interrupted. He heard sniffling and then after a little while he heard sobs. He heard the boy crying, his sobs escaped even though it was clear that he slwas trying to hold them back.
Bruce felt his heart stop at that moment. His baby boy was crying. His baby was crying and it was his fault. It was heartbreaking hearing the little boy cry. Not being able to handle it, Bruce entered the room without knocking.
Damian tried to stop his sobs as soon as his father entered, but failed to. He had kept his emotions bottled up for so long that it was hard to stop now. He thought his father would punish him for showing weakness, why would he not? His mother used to beat him if he dared to show weakness.
To the boy's surprise, he was not met with a hit. Instead, his father sat down on his bed, and pulled him into his lap, craddling him like one would do so with a baby. It felt strange, yet warm and comforting. It only made Damian cry harder because someone was showing him that he was loved and cared for.
Bruce just craddled his baby because that was what his son was to him, his baby. He held him tighter as the boy cried harder than before. "It's okay, baby, it's okay. Just let it all out, i'm right here," Bruce said, hoping to get the boy calm. He stood up with his boy in his arms, and started rocking him. Damian wrapped his arms around Bruce's neck and his legs around his torso. Bruce had an arm under his son and the other on his back, rubbing it soothingly to comfort him.
Damian layed his head on his father's shoulder, feeling safe, warm and loved. It was amazing how he felt so safe in his father's arms.
After about ten minutes, Damian had calmed down and was just sniffling. "I'm sorry for disobeying your orders. It was stupid and reckless. I'm sorry for everything I have done wrong. I am sorry for crying like a baby. I'm sorry." Damian had started to apologize rapidly and running out of breath, and he wanted to cry more. Bruce cringed. His son was trying apologizing to him even though he didn't need to.
"No, Damian. It's me who should be apologizing. I am sorry for yelling at you, i'm sorry for making you feel like you don't fit in. But let me tell you something, son. I love you just the way you are, and i want you. You are wanted and loved and you belong here with me. Nowhere else but with me. You are my son, my baby. Don't ever think or let someone tell you any different." Damian started to cry again. No one besides Dick had ever said that they loved him.
"I love you too, Daddy." Bruce was surprised his son called him 'Daddy' instead of 'father'. He held his son tighter. He started to walk out of his son's room with him in his arms. Damian was confused at first, but then realized his father was taking him to his room.
Bruce was glad he had taken a quick shower and gotten into pajamas before he went to go check on Damian because now he wouldn't have to let go of his son. He took off the covers of the bed with one arm and slid into bed, placing his son next to him. The lamp on the nightstand was on so he turned it off, turning away from his son a little. He faced his son again and smiled. Bruce slipped an arm under Damian and brought him closer to himself. Damian burried his head in his father's chest, cuddling for warmth.
"Damian, I hope you can forgive me for yelling at you and making you feel that way. I was juat frustrated and i didn't mean any of it. I'm still learning how to be a parent, even though i've been one for years, and everything I do is to protect you." Bruce apologized. "It's alright, Daddy. I forgive you. I'll try to listen to you more," Damian said, looking up at his daddy. Bruce looked into his son's eyes. Big, beautiful emerald green eyes looking up at him. He ran his fingers through Damian's hair and kissed his son's face. Such an adorable little human being with small lips, a tiny little nose, cheeks that still have baby fat, big and bright eyes, and the boy was tiny for his age.
Damian's mother had never kissed him before. He didn't even know that parents kissed their kids as a form of affection.
Bruce kissed Damian's cheeks, nose and forehead. Damian loved the affection and attention he was recieving and he smiled. Damian sat up, surprising Bruce, ans kissed his cheek. He then laid back down into the way he was a few seconds ago. He closed his eyes and started to relax his body, and falling asleep a few minutes later.
'Crying must have tired him out' thought Bruce.He stayed awake for a while longer, hearing his son breath evenly. He relaxed knowing that his son was in his arms, safe and sound. He can't believe how much he loved this little boy, but then again, how could he not? Damian was his son, not only by blood but by heart too. With these thoughts in his head and his baby asleep in his arms, Bruce fell into a restful sleep.