A.N.

trigger warning this chapter is about suicide and if you have depression don't read this. just go to the next chapter you get all the information there.

Chapter 0: prologue

"Josh, I'm sorry I can't talk to you after what you said, I think that we should stop talking for a while. I still love you and care about you. I'm sorry" *beep* if you would like to repeat the message please press. *beep*.

"Well, I really have hit rock bottom. Dead end job, a new one starting soon, 20 years old and still live with my family, and now the only person who knows about my depression is gone." "why am I such a FUCKING IDIOT!," I said throwing the empty bottle of whiskey at the wall and crying ass it broke. "Thank god my parents aren't home," I said with my face still in my hands. "My family…. Isn't….. Home." I said in my drunken stupor.

I walked out of my room in the basement and upstairs to the kitchen. when I got up the stairs I walked over to the fridge and grabbed a beer and started walking back to the stairs and when I took the first step I looked back and the first thing that I saw was the knife on the counter from when I made dinner. I walked slowly back to the kitchen and carefully grabbed the knife acting as if the thing would jump out and stab me on its own. holding the knife in my hands I carefully walked downstairs and into my living room and sat on the couch.

" God... damn it." I said taking another swig the crying " GOD DAMMIT ALL." I could hear something in my head. it sounded distant but I cloud hear it clearly " you should just die," it said almost in a mocking tone " no one will miss you". i started to cry harder "no one loves you "I could feel myself-lifting the knife to my throat " your wrong" I said holding the knife on my neck. "do it" it hissed at me " shut up" I said angrily back " do it " it said again " I said SHUT UP YOUR WRONG." I said standing my ground. "THEN PROVE IT.," it said almost sounding impatient.

The voices had suddenly gotten a lot deeper almost guttural sounding, these voices always visited me when I was depressed but they have never been impatient with me." just leave me alone," I said crying with the knife firmly pressed against my neck " DO. IT." it said edging me on " no," I said begging for it to stop "" it repeated louder "no," I said getting scared it was repeating louder and louder to the point that I couldn't even hear my own voice.

then there was nothing, no voices, no tv in the next room just the sounds of silence. then I realized I was choking, I put my hand to my neck and then my face paled when I realized what I had done. as I looked at my blood soaked hand I knew that there was no help for me anymore. I fell off the couch spilling my beer as I desperately clawed for air that I was not receiving I crawled over to the stairs and fell flat on the carpet as my vision started to fade and blood pooled around me.

then as my vision was getting to its darkest point I could see a light that was pulling not my soul but my body I could feel myself getting engulfed by the light then darkness.

=AN=

Hey, guys, it's me thegallbroz I just wanted to let you know that this is the first story that I have written in a very long time. Well… I guess the first time on this page so please let me know if you like it I will be reading all of the comments and personal messages daily so if you like it let me know and I will keep writing more chapters. so see you whenever