A/N: If you're a regular reader, you're probably wondering why I would be writing something that even mentions the word "het". And yet, here I am, writing something special and cracky for Mahou, one of my best friends on this site. I told her I would write a Larxora, that is, a Larxene/Sora fic, and I think that at times you should actually stay true to your word. I know it's a first for me, but here goes. I hope this is good enough, but I'm not really good at het crack.
Disclaimer: If I owned anything, you would all be seeing some disturbing changes in the KH universe. Sadly, I own nothing.
Half past noon was when hell officially started for me.
I know, sounds like I'm making a big deal out of nothing, right? You have no idea how wrong you are. Axel and Zexion had both warned me not to try and get in to Hollow Bastion High, that there would be more people like me at Twilight. But no, I wanted a good education, so I took the exams and got into a private school. Very nice, Larxene Cassidy. Now that I've officially entered the prep breeding grounds, why don't I sell out entirely and take down my Iron Maiden and Sex Pistols posters? You know, replace them with the Jonas Brothers and David Archuleta? And to think Zexion would be right about something for a change.
But I digress. The real point here isn't how much I suffered; it's who helped me get through that place, and why he wasn't just another face.
Like I said, this all started at half pat noon, aka lunch. You would not believe how hard it is for people to take a hint. Of course, by "hint" I mean shouting "Why the hell do you think I would care?!" Some people just don't get it. In hindsight, though, I'm sort of glad that Paine stopped me from attacking Setzer. Clawing someone's eyes out doesn't exactly make for the greatest parent-teacher conference. But anyway, I was desperate to get out. I didn't even know the school had a door to the roof, but apparently one day I ran right through it. And I do mean that literally, as in wood was suddenly connecting with my forehead. It came out of nowhere. But the roof was probably the greatest thing about the school. For one thing, it was the perfect place to hurl your lunch at people as they were walking underneath. For the ones I really hated, I would spit on them.
This would have gone on throughout the year if someone else hadn't found my roof. I had just come up after kicking Mr. Vexen where it hurt when he started lecturing me. He probably deserved it for something else, but that wasn't the biggest priority. As I ran out to my roof, ready to take out my rage on whomever so happened to be underneath, I instead got a pretty rude shock.
"Hi there! Do you like the roof too?"
I think he must've been related to Cloud or Roxas. How else could his hair defy gravity? And what was with that stupid smile, or those huge shoes?
He was, in short, one of the biggest dorks I had ever seen.
Furthermore, he was on MY ROOF.
"What do you think you're doing on my roof, kid?"
He looked confused. "Your…roof?"
"Yeah, as in this is my place. My roof. I want to know what you're doing here."
"But…" he stuttered, "The roof's a big place. Why can't we just share?"
I sighed deeply. I was not in the mood for explanations right now. "Listen, kid, there's something you've got to understand. I was here first. Ergo, this whole place belongs to me. Now, is there anything I need to repeat?"
"Okay…I-I guess…" he mumbled, and then slowly walked off. I felt kind of bad for being the one to break his spirit, but hey, somebody had to do it. Now then…as I surveyed my potential victims, it would seem I should've paid more attention to my back.
"Whatcha doin'?"
Trying not to scream, I spun around. "Kid!" I hissed, "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"
"I got bored," he said as if it were normal to stealthily creep up and try to murder someone when you got bored. "So, Whatcha doin'?"
"I," I began, "am looking for targets."
"Targets?"
"Well, I figured we should at least use the lunches for something." It was then that I spotted Rinoa. "All right, Heartlily," I breathed, "prepare yourself. This will hurt you a lot more than it hurts me."
I tuck careful aim, at first debating over whether to go for her face or the bleached-white blouse, before finally deciding it didn't really matter. With that, I took the entirely-fake Sloppy Joe from the lunch and fired.
It was the loudest shriek I had ever heard. Considering I had been doing this daily for a couple of months that was really saying something. "Quick, get down!" I pulled the kid below the lip of the roof.
He looked at me, seeming confused. "Why'd you do that?"
I snorted. "She deserved it didn't she?"
"I don't know…no one really deserves that, do they? At least, nobody here has done anything that bad…"
"Umm," it was almost impossible for anyone to be this naïve. "How about they deserve it because they go here? You know, private school, land of the preps?"
"Is it that bad? I still don't think anyone actually means to be…"
"An ass?"
"I just don't think anyone wants to be mean. It's no fun at all."
This kid had probably been sheltered from the world…and had never watched TV or gone on the internet. That was probably why he had no idea just what people were like. Yep, a totally reasonable explanation. I would have told him that to his face, but the bell decided to ring right then. After a few muttered curses I had yanked the door open and was already halfway towards Mr. Highwind's woodshop class when I thought about something that seemed important on this slow, dreary day.
I didn't even know what the kid's name was.
Ah, well, he would probably be up there tomorrow. I hope, said a little voice in my head.
A/N: I know, it's extremely crappy, but that's because I'm even worse at het than I am at slash. But hey, Mahou, here you go.
TBC