Blood runs red
I slowly walk down the halls ignoring everyone. I walk down through the courtyard and over the cliff that hangs over the lake. I sit down with my feet dangling over the edge, realizing that all my friends are gone... I would have been with them too, If i never insisted on going up to the library to finish the essay assignment we had been given. Even though it wasn't due for another three days.
I stare out into the lake, Harry was gone, Ron, Luna ,Ginny... A lump forms in my throat and I close my eyes to prevent myself from crying. Try hard not to remember what had happened that day.
It was just like any other tuesday. We had just finished Charms class and we were about to head down to the great for lunch. I told Harry and Ron I would meet them in a while, because I wanted to finish up the essay we had been given. About ten minutes later, I could hear screaming coming from outside, I turned to look out the window. Students were rushing outside, fighting Death Eaters.
Voldemort had somehow found a way to break into hogwarts.
My heart pounded, I panicked, not sure what to think or do. I slowly made my way to the enterance of the library. The halls were empty so I slowly began to walk down, forgetting about my bookbag which was still in the library. I turned the corner to see bodies, either hurt terribly or dead. I looked all around for my friends but I couldn't see any of them. I didn't want to scream either. It would draw attention to myself, and certainly I did not want to end up dead.
My thoughts were inturpted by somebody. "Granger?"
I spin around to see who had called me. "Malfoy? What are you doing here."
"I could ask you the same, Granger."
I sigh. "Thinking."
He sits down beside me. "About what?" He asks
"My friends are all dead, and I could have been too, right now maybe that would have been the better option." my voice becomes softer with each word.
He looks at me almost shocked. "You're not the only one who lost relatives in the battle, I lost my parents, Blaise, Pansy."
I don't bother to look at him. "You could have prevented that! You are one of them, you would have known, now leave me alone."
"Get away from that Cliff Granger, you could fall."
"Would that really be such a bad thing? I'm surprised you aren't tempted to push me over. after all you've been waiting for a chance to get rid of me."
"Please, Granger I know we don't get along very well..."
I Cut him off mid-sentence. "We don't get along at all." I snap.
"It's not like I wanted anyone to die." He calls after me.
would it be such a tragedy if I had
I slowly get up and walk towards the castle. Wondering what to do next, the battle had ended. I was finishing up my last year of school and soon I would be working at the Ministry for the rest of my life. Without anyone I love there to help me, guide me support me. I would have no one. I didn't even dare speak to Ron's parents, wondering what they would think of me. Why weren't you with them, couldn't you have finished your school work later? Why didn't you conivince them to work on thier essays as well.
I walk with my head low and return up to my room. I sit on the bed and sob... Less than a week ago. Not only had I lost my friends, but I lost the only person I truly loved. I lost so many others that I had known... Cho, Lavender, a few of the other girls who had been in Gryffindor, almost the entire Dumbledore's army had passed on. All of them except for Hermione Granger, I was told that I was very lucky to be alive. That out of all the people who had died that day Hermione Granger had survived the battle. The only member of the trio to do so. How lucky is Hermione Granger.
I didn't feel lucky, not once. Not even for a second, because life isn't worth it if the ones you love are all gone. Im not old enough to have kids, I don't have any family outside my Mother and Father, the only friends I had are gone. The ones I had made in school before I came to hogwarts don't even remember me. No kids ever lived in my neighbourhood and I didn't want to face Ron's parents, after what I had been through, what I could have done. I could have prevented thier deaths. I could have, but I didn't
The next day, I didn't go to class. I did not want to go to class, I wanted to lie in bed all day. Forget about all the horrors I've seen. The horrors I had been through, The only thing I ever wanted was to be with the ones I loved, for the rest of my life. No matter where I was, or lived, regardless of how much money I had. But what most people had, was something I'd never get. My friends and Family were dead, and sometime I would have to move on and accept it.
I hear the door open and look towards it. McGonagall stand in the doorway.
" , you were not in my class this morning, so I check the hospital wing and the library, you weren't there either, Is everything okay?"
"I thank you for your concern Professor, but I think I will be fine." I choke on my tears. She comes over to me and sits down beside me.
"I know you miss them, dear" Is all she says.
I nod. "More than anything." I respond slowly. "I would give anything for them to be here."
I turn to face her sobbing. "I can't take it anymore, I miss them too much. I want-to-be-with-them." I choke sobbing on tears. I-can't-be-alone-anymore."
Mcgongall gives me a worried look and takes me hand. "lets go to the hospital wing." She speaks softly. "Alright?"
I don't refuse and slowly follow alongside her. When we arrive at the Hospital wing I take a seat on one of the beds While she talks to Madame Pomfrey.
" , How are you doing?"
"I-want-to-be-with-my-friends." I say, trying to speak through tears. "I... i'm.. d..done." I reply sobbing.
After my reply she looks stunned. She returns after a moment with a small bottle of potion. "This is a calming draught, , you may feel sleepy afterwards. Thats normal, just sleep for a while and take a few days to rest and calm down."
I nod slowly taking the bottle from her hands. I lie down, my eyelids become heavy and I slip away into the darkness.
I'm walking down the hallway, everything is in grey. I see people lying on the floor, people fighting all around me. I look over to my right and watch as Luna falls to the ground. I scream in horror yet nobody seems to hear it. Up ahead I see Ron and Ginny, I run to them and try and prevent the curses from hitting them, but they fly right through me and they both fall to the ground. I kneel down beside them and sob..
I open my eyes slowly.
"You were screaming in your sleep dear, I thought I should wake you."
Tears run down my face. "All... my frie...freinds.. d...died." I stammer. "I... I.. saw ...saw it all.."
I swing my feet over the bed and stand up.
" , you cannot leave this hospital wing in the condition you are in."
I start to walk. "You can't make me stay!" I scream. "You have no say in what I do!"
" , you must stay here. I'm sorry to be the one to say this to you, but as of now you are not stable. You could hurt yourself."
I turn around. "Good, maybe then I'll die and I can join my friends!" I breathe heavily and start to sob. She comes over to me and walks me back to the bed.
"Shhh, don't you cry now, everything will be alright."
I sit back down and Madam Pomfrey hands me a dreamless sleep potion. "Get some sleep dear, it'll make you feel better."
I take the potion without question and drift off into a deep sleep once more. When I wake, although I feel rested. I still do not feel better, a tray of breakfast sits on the table in front of me. I look at it, slowly I eye the knife and pick it up. I drag the flat end of the blade across my wrist. Thinking about it, after five minutes I take a deep breath and drag the blade across my wirst three times. Scarlett blood flows out of the cuts.
I guess madam Pomfrey must have seen me, because the knife soons flies out of my hands. She sighs. "Oh, Miss Granger..." She starts to work on cleaning up my wrist only moments later. she sighs, " , I promise that we will get you some help alright?"
I nod, the only thing I really want is to see my friends and family again. I want to hear somebody call me by name, instead of all the time. I want people to accept me and be there for me. I know my proffesors will help me. But they will never be as good as my real family and friends. Something I wish I had more than anything.
Everyone I love Is gone. I have no reason to live, so why should I?
Madam Pomfrey continuously checks on me. I am no longer allowed to eat anything unsupervised. Even though they don't give me knives anymore. Nobody comes to visit me, it's incredibly lonely. I have nobody to talk to, most of the time I just sleep, I haven't touched any of the school work my teachers have brought me.
I continue to miss my friends every minute, I wish they were here with me more than anything. At moments I want to break-down completely and cry my eyes out. Thinking it might help me get over things. But inside I know that will make everything worse.
I curl up in the little bed and pull the blankets over my body. I scratch the cuts on my wirst open and watch as beads of blood drip out onto the light blue sheets.
My heart breaks as I remember all the people who died that day, some much younger than us. Who had their entire lives ahead of them.
I think of them and thier parents. Who were hoping to see there children come off the hogwarts express. Joining them on summer holidays, swimming and playing out in the yard. I think of the days I spent with my paretns when I was much younger. We would go for walks in the nearby park. Mom would take me swimming to the community pool in the summers. In the fall I would help Dad rake the leaves and then we would jump in them together. I think to the begining of that year.
I erased every part of the memories they had of me. Now it's hard to think that they are gone, and they never even knew that they had a daughter.
I scratch even harder at my cuts opening them wider and wider. Tears fall from my eyes as I the cuts on my wrist grow, soon blood is constantly flowing from my wrist. Soon the bedsheets become scarlett red. My breathing slows, I feel the covers being ripped off me. Several people are at my side, fidling with things. Blood runs down my arms, covering almost my entire side. I feel my hear start to pump faster trying to make up for all the blood im losing.
Somebody tries to force me to drink something, I refuse it. Just as I feel like I'm about to lose consciousness. I can tell oxygen being forced into me, I look to the side and somebody forces something into my arm, causing me to fall asleep. When I wake it seems to be many hours later. I don't have a clue where I am, I slowly force myself to sit. The pain has left my body.
Once again, I am able to see my friends.
