Disclaimer:I own nothing!
At least nothing remotely related to the awesome show "The Vampire Diaries"... it's sad, but it's true.
It's all Julie and Kevin! I love these guys for creating such an incredible show!
Oh... and I do not own the books either... haven't even read them!
Enjoy...!
Special thanks go to my awesome beta BeautifulDreamer.x who helped turn my "sucky" english in a beautiful story! I love and appreciate everything you did! 3 A/N:
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Elena looked out onto the deck, her gaze drifting towards Damon who was sat on the railing. She smiled at him and waved him to come in. He however, simply returned the smile before looking away quickly. Elena grabbed a strand of mistletoe she had found in a box full of old Christmas decoration and walked out to him instead.
"With all of the drama, you're missing the actual fun part." She held the mistletoe over her head, a flirty smile settling on her face as Damon looked up.
"Elena, we can't. I can't."
"Damon, you can't keep telling me that this isn't real. I know how I feel and that you feel it too, so stop fighting it." Damon didn't respond. He looked into the house at Bonnie and Jeremy who were still going through boxes of decorations, smiling over old memories.
"It's good to see you like that. All normal with your brother. I want that again for you. Christmas was always mine and Stefan's favorite holiday when we were kids. Not that I've celebrated it since. I kind of miss that." The reason why Damon has been so reserved the whole day suddenly dawned on Elena.
"You're thinking about how upset he'll be when he finds out that you and I are together."
"I've been lying to him all day."
"No, you were helping me with Jeremy."
„The point is not what I was doing. The point is that I'm here with you. I was supposed to invoke the sire bond, Elena, send you away. I was supposed to do the right thing by you and the right thing by my brother. Which is what I'm gonna do right now. You're gonna go home."
„What? No, Damon."
„I'm gonna stay here with Jeremy. I'm gonna help him complete the mark. I'll teach him how to hunt, I'll protect him, and we'll kill vampires without you."
„Damon, please."
„I'm setting you free, Elena. This is what I want. This is what will make me happy."
Elena looked at him with tears in her eyes.
"Please Damon, this won't change how I feel. It never was right but it is right now... that's what you said two days ago, remember?" Elena tried to reason with him, but he didn't listen to her. He turned and entered the house, leaving her to stand alone.
Elena made a grab for the railing Damon was sitting on just moments ago to steady herself. In a matter of seconds, her whole world, which was finally complete now that she had admitted her feelings for Damon, seemed to crumble. She felt like someone had ripped her apart from the inside. Her stomach was jolting, making her feel nauseous. If she still had a beating heart, it would be hammering right now. She started to hyperventilate and her forehead was covered in cold sweat.
Damon had to use all of his strength to keep his promise. As if the 'freedom' part wasn't hard enough, his heart broke completely when he looked into her doe-like eyes. Tears already welling up, her expression scared, almost horrified of what was to come. He shook his head, attempting to banish the thoughts from his mind. He had to do it; he had to do it for Stefan and most of all he had to do it for her. He knew how important it was for Elena to make her own decisions; to have her own opinion on things and how she loved to reason and argue with everyone. He couldn't take that away from her. He had no choice; he had to set her free.
On autopilot, Damon rushed through the living room, snatching up a bottle of bourbon as he walked and headed to the front door. He could hear Jeremy and Bonnie's laughter echo throughout the house. Opening the door had taken him as much effort, as if the damn thing was made of steel and covered in vervain. Everything he'd done – from walking to breathing or even using any of his senses – was suddenly harder than anything he remembered.
He sat down on the front porch and gulped down some bourbon straight from the bottle. How was he supposed to live like that? What if it was true and Elena's feelings have been caused by the sire bond? What if she'd go back to loving Stefan again? Before all of this had happened, he could only fantasize about being with Elena. She's been his brother's girl and it has been pure torture to watch her with him, but now? Now, that he's had an actual taste of the real thing? Now that he'd enjoyed 12 blissful hours with her? He couldn't do that again. He couldn't watch them being all lovey-dovey and just stand on the sidelines. Those 12 hours – as short an amount of time it was – had been the best hours of his entire existence. He couldn't just wipe the memory away. Setting her free might fix Elena, but it sure as hell would destroy him.
Elena was still trying to regain her composure when she heard someone behind her. She didn't have the strength to turn around and really... it didn't matter. As long as it wasn't Damon – and of that she was absolutely sure – nothing else mattered anymore.
"Elena? Hey, what the hell happened out here?" A femine voice asked her as a hand stroked down her back. Bonnie. She let out a strangled sob, making Bonnie jump in shock. "Hey... calm down, what happened? Damon just walked through the house like a zombie! Talk to me, Elena..." With a little help from Bonnie, Elena managed to turn around before sinking to the floor. Bonnie sighed and sat down on the deck beside her, still stroking her back, attempting to soothe her.
"Talk to me..." she repeated softly. Elena took a few deep breaths and eventually, the tears stopped. "He set me free. I don't want to be free if that means I'm losing him, Bonnie! I can't lose him... I don't know what to do!" She managed to tell her best friend before she started sobbing again.
"What do you mean he set you free?"
"Apparently I'm sired to him."
Bonnie looked shocked. "You're what?"
"I couldn't keep animal blood and bloodbags down because he had told me I could only drink human blood straight from the vein. When he'd asked me to try a bloodbag agin yesterday, I didn't throw it back up. I'd told you about that last night. I was turned with Damon's blood which created a sirebond."
"And is there a way to break it?" Bonnie asked.
"The only way to break it is for Damon to set me free. He did that about five minutes ago..." Elena told her, a hint of bitterness showing in her still weak voice as she wiped her wet eyes. "He told me that it would make him happy if I'd live my life without him. I can't, Bonnie, how am I supposed to do that?"
"Elena... I'm sure he didn't mean it like it seems. He won't be happy without you. He did that for you. I know this doesn't make you feel any better right now, but he loves you, Elena. Everyone knows that."
"I know he loves me... And I really like him, too, Bonnie! My feelings aren't a product of that stupid bond! I spoke to Tyler about it and he said the bond only affects how you act, not how you feel. You know I've had feelings for him way before my transition!"
"Yeah, I know." Bonnie had never been too pleased with Elena's affection for Damon but seeing her best friend like this, it broke her heart. She knew Elena loved him and after everything she had been through, she deserved to finally be happy; even if that meant Bonnie had to come to terms with Damon.
"And Damon doesn't believe you that your feelings are real?"
"Apparently not. I told him I didn't want him to break the bond because it has nothing to do with my feelings for him but he 'set me free' anyway."
Bonnie looked concerned, clearly thinking hard about something. "I get that Elena, but not breaking the sire bond doesn't seem like an option... I mean you would never be able to make your own decisions. Haven't you always loved that about Stefan? That he respects your decisions no matter what?"
"Damon would never take advantage of that!"
„Maybe not intentionally... but think about our trip to Whitmore College. You couldn't drink from that blonde girl because you'd seen the picture of her little sister. He said it was in your nature to feed from people. He hadn't told you to feed from another person specifically. But yet you still did it. You had fed from almost everyone at that party and you'd enjoyed it. So if the sire bond doesn't only influence you directly like when Damon gives you an order to do something, but also passively like when he doesn't like something, you try to make it right so he's no longer disappointed... you could end up with a problem."
Elena thought about that for a second. Maybe Bonnie had a point. Elena was sure Damon would never use the sire bond on purpose, but if it really worked that way – and it seemed like it – then they really had to break it. She knew one thing for sure, she wasn't ready to give up on Damon! Not now, not yet! She was finally ready to commit to her feelings for him and now, after merely two days, she was supposed to let him go again? No way! She would break that damn bond and proof to Damon – and to everyone else – how she was truly feeling.
"You could be right. If it works like that, we have to break it! Can you look in your grimoires? There has to be a spell for something like that. Please, I can't do this without you..." Elena pleaded and Bonnie didn't have to think twice about it. She wanted her best friend to be happy.
"Of course I'll help you! But it'll take some time to figure something out. Give me three days, alright?" Bonnie smiled a heartfelt smile which Elena returned, happily.
"Thank you, Bonnie!" Elena pulled her best friend into a tight hug without using too much vampire-strength. She knew Bonnie would find a spell. Elena let Bonnie go and stood up, helping Bonnie to her feet. Stepping back into the house, they gathered their things and both said their goodbyes to Jeremy and Shane. Elena glanced around but with no sign of Damon, she simply picked up her bags and headed for the door with Bonnie at her heels.
Damon didn't know if he had sat there for minutes, hours or days when he slowly awoke from his numbed-out state. He heard Bonnie and Elena talking inside the lake house and knew they would be out there in a few seconds. Quickly glancing back, he ran off, his vampire speed powering him through the trees. Another look in Elena's eyes and he wouldn't need the sun to get burned to ashes; He felt like he was in hell anyways.
Elena stepped out of the lake house door and looked back at her best friend. "Bonnie, could you stop at the boarding house first?"
"Elena, I don't think that's a very good..."
"All of my things are still there Bonnie. Please... I won't be long. You told me you would do anything to figure out how to break the bond and I trust you. Damon had had to wait for me for so long, I guess I can wait for him for three days." Elena gave Bonnie a weak smile. When they stopped in the driveway to the boarding house, Elena took a deep breath.
"You don't have to do this, you know? You can crash at my place." Bonnie suggested.
Elena's expression changed from insecure and afraid to determined in a split second. "No! I can do this! I'm no longer a weak human being, I am strong now. I'm a fighter!"
Elena had told Bonnie she wouldn't be long and that she trusted her with finding a way to break the bond. And that was absolutely true. She had spent so much time crying and mourning when she had been human, she just didn't want that anymore. It had broken her heart when Damon had 'set her free', but she couldn't quite imagine the agony he must be in right now. At least she knew with dead certainty that her feelings were real; He didn't. Damon had been waiting for two years; forced to watch her being happy with Stefan, his own brother and always standing on the sidelines. He could only guess that her feelings for him grew over time but he could never act upon them.. because of Stefan.
Elena could understand why he was dubious to accept her feelings. After all, she had finally confessed her feelings and after a few hours, he learns that she's sired to him. Of course his natural reaction would be to think that nothing they've shared has been real in the first place. So he had to do the one thing that would break both their hearts as well as the sire bond and set her free. She had to be strong and confident for both of them now.
"Wait in the car, I'll be back soon!" Bonnie just nodded and Elena walked towards the front door. She knocked and when no one answered the door, she let herself in.