Chapter 01

JON

The sun was ready to set behind Jon when he finished tending the gardens. The cold air blew harshly on his sweaty head, bringing shivers to the back of his neck.

The cold and exhaustion was least of his concerns. He was hungry. The night was approaching but he had not eaten anything for the day.

He washed his hands with the cold water from the barrel and ignored the other workers who were also cleaning up for the day. He sometimes heard them chatter about him. But after years of tolerance, they too ignored him and the fact that he was the Stark bastard.

"Let me help you with that, Luna." Jon took the bucket filled with water from Luna, the Stark's most trusted kitchen ward.

"Oh, thank you, Jon. I have not seen you all day. Where were you?" the slim woman asked.

"I was busy." Jon simply answered walking beside her.

"You better put snow on that cheek of yours. Your father will be wondering about it." Luna told.

"I would just say I slipped if he asks." Jon tried to sound like it was a joke but Luna never really found him funny.

"Ha, you say it as if you can lie to the Lord Stark." She exclaimed.

Jon touched his right cheek. It felt warmer than the rest of his face but it doesn't sting as much as this morning. "Well I'm lucky my hair has grown fast enough."

Vanity was never part of his routine. Nobody would be looking at him, the girls especially gave him no mind.

"Where do you need this, Luna?" he asked about the bucket of water when they arrived at the castle back door.

"Oh, just put it there. I can manage." Luna answered, she was supposed to say something but her attention was grabbed by the servant girl rushing to her.

"Luna, Lady Catelyn is asking for the new candlesticks." Asked one of the girl servants. "Have you seen them?"

"Seriously, I cook the food in this castle and you people are expecting me to know all the Stark possessions! Unbelievable!" Luna exclaimed as she marched, the girl followed.

Jon faintly smiled at the servant girl but perhaps she was too frantic to even look at him.

He let himself into the kitchen. He wished he had stopped Luna and bothered her for a bread and milk. But she was already out of sight.

"Your father will arrive in a few hours, Arya. Now go fix yourself."

He heard Lady Stark's voice. He thought of asking her for food. But quickly he changed his mind.

"I'm all dirty, mother but I am not broken." His little sister, Arya pointlessly protested.

"Just go." Lady Catelyn sternly said to Arya who in the end followed.

"Mother, may I wear the gold necklace you bought for me on my last nameday? I'd like to wear something special for father." Sansa asked.

Jon had always admired his sister's beauty. She looked exactly like the Lady. He just wished she was close to him like Arya.

"Yes, of course. It is in my dress closet, wooden box with a fish engraving. Have you seen Robb and Bran?" Catelyn asked.

"No, I have not, mother. But there's one of them." Sansa said pointing at her eldest brother Robb entering the kitchen door.

"Saw Brandon in the south wing. You're fretting for nothing, mother." said Robb.

"Oh, I'm not fretting, for you hid the fact that Bran is on the roof of one of the towers in the South wing."

"Well, he was sitting on a beam the last time I saw." Robb kissed his mother's cheek.

Jon was silent all the while. He was feeling awkward having to stand alone in a corner of the kitchen trying to assemble his sentence.

"What are you staring at, bastard?" he did not notice Theon entering the room.

"I-i was not." He quickly opposed.

"Yes, you were. Are you saying that I am a liar?" Theon approached Jon.

"I did not mean that. I won't even dare." Jon knew defending himself was a weak attempt.

"Stop it, Greyjoy." Robb sternly said.

"He was watching us like we were entertainment!" Theon protested.

"No, I wasn't. I swear." Jon added. He soon realized that Lady Catelyn's attention was towards them.

"Then what are you standing around the kitchen for?" she questioned, eyes scrutinizing.

"I-i just came in to tell you, my lady that I was done with the stables and the gardens." Jon swallowed as he assessed if he could ask the lady, "And perhaps ask for a meal? I have missed lunch." Jon did not bother mentioning about his missed breakfast, that will not help he thought. He asked for food as least demanding as he could, for he knew how thin Lady Stark's patience was with him.

"If you were quicker with your chores then you would have eaten on time." The lady said.

"I'm sorry if I was delayed. It was difficult for me to move, my back still hurts-"

It was too late for Jon to stop his mouth. The lady raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

"So are you accusing that it was my fault that you did not eat?" she interrupted Jon's statement.

"No. No, my lady." Jon shook his head, frantically searched for right words to say.

"Lord Stark will be home in a couple of hours. You were aware of it, yes?" Catelyn continued.

"Yes, my lady." Jon answered nervously.

"Did you do it on purpose? Did you unhurriedly do your chores so that my husband will see you all dirty and drenched in sweat?" she asked marching slowly towards him.

Jon could not look elsewhere but the floor. He felt the servants grew quieter sensing the tension. "No, my lady." He answered simply.

"He'll be here soon yet you chose to lurk around the castle covered in horse filth. Then you plea for food as if I was starving you. Were you trying to embarrass me in front of my workers, bastard?" Lady Stark had a way of speaking that she did not need to raise her voice to show authority. Or that had always was the way she talked to him.

"No, of course not. I'm sorry, Lady Stark." Jon apologized. He just wanted to disappear.

"Why?" Lady Stark asked Jon, taking him by surprise.

"Mother." Robb moved towards his mother and whispered to her to stop the provocation.

"Why are you sorry?" she insisted.

What would he answer? He just wanted a piece of bread in exchange of a whole day's work.

"I-I'm sorry for offending you, Lady Stark. I will try harder to be in my best behavior." It was all he could muster. Jon did not want any more trouble especially now that Lord Stark was to arrive.

"Go to your chamber and clean up. Stay out of sight until Lord Stark arrives, can you do that?"

Jon nodded. He did not move until Lady Stark turned her back on him and ordered the servants to return to their tasks. He took a glimpse of the array of food spread on the kitchen table waiting for Lord Stark's arrival.

He silently blamed himself. In a few hours there will be a feast and he was too impatient to wait. He could have saved himself the trouble of being at the lady's vision.

But he still fought hard just to turn around and drink water from the tap instead.

Jon did not notice his older brother Robb was standing beside him as he washed the drinking glass he used.

"I will have Luna bring you soup and bread in your chamber if I find her. Just follow mother for now. She's in distress. It's not everyday father comes home." Robb said, sounding remorseful about his mother's words.

"Please, don't bother, Robb. Luna already has a lot on her hands. I will be fine. I have gone longer without a morsel. But thank you for your kindness." Jon smiled faintly at him, trying so hard to convince Robb that he was fine.

"Jon,-"

Jon interjected "I need to go to my chambers. Your mother will be mad at me if she sees me here." Jon wiped his hands with his dirty clothes. "See you at the gates, my lord." Jon said, barely looking at Robb.

He made sure that he leaves the kitchen as fast as he can. He was certain that Robb will insist in bringing him food and they both get into trouble for it.

Jon dragged himself upstairs to the top floor, every step getting heavier and heavier.

He pushed his room's lockless door and let himself in.

The cold air blew hard reminding him to mend the window covers if and ever he had time.

He put down his fur coat on the bed and then stood in front of his faded mirror as he removed the sweaty shirt he was wearing. He looked at himself in the mirror and lightly touched the old scars painted over his pale chest. He tried to recall what he did to deserve them but could not remember.

He did not need to look at his back for the smock he wore underneath still tainted of red marks. It had already been a week but still it pained him to move or even lie down.

Jon recalled what he did that got Lady Stark furious enough to lash him. He fell asleep. He was ordered that he wait for Robb and Theon to return home from a feast. He waited, kept himself busy but his eyes ultimately gave up on him.

Ten lashes for being too tired.

Lady Stark was always keen about hitting him on parts discreet from people, particularly to her husband, his father. Jon did not make any promise of not letting Lord Stark know of the lady's treatment towards him, but the Lady Stark need not to make him promise.

They fought about him, Lady Catelyn and Lord Eddard. He had heard arguments between the two and he had seen the Lady cry. His guilt pained him more than the wounds on his back, convincing him that perhaps he deserved the wounds.

He went to the corner of his chamber where he built a makeshift bathroom. There was water in the bucket and the bucket he helped Luna carry was there, too. He smiled at the thought of Luna being kind to him.

He touched the water. Winter was definitely coming. He removed what was left of his clothes and scooped the tin dipper and bravely poured the cold water over his head.

The water was relieving and painful at the same time on his body. He grimaced as it ran down his back. But his father was coming home. He would endure pain of any sort just to look presentable to him.

His father was coming home after being away for almost five full moons. And he heard from the servants that he might be staying home for good.

He dried himself quickly and put on the clothes Lady Stark gave him yesterday. He combed his hair with his fingers and still was unsatisfied. He looked at his right cheek where Lady Stark slapped him to wake him up this morning. The mark was almost gone, he sighed.

Jon looked out the window as the sun was ready to set. He reminded himself to ask for new candle as he lit the only one standing on his bedside table.

He then knelt at his bedside to pray. He prayed for the old Gods to protect his father at all times, that Lady Stark would have a change of heart towards him, and to keep his mother safe, wherever she would be, whatever she was doing, whoever she was.

He prayed often. When all his work is done for the day, he prayed. Each time he felt wronged and hurt, he prayed.

Lord Stark taught him how when he was young, and was told that not all prayers were supposed to be answered.

He sat on his bed and looked out his window, hoping that Lord Stark would arrive soon, hoping that the rumors were true.

"They are coming, Jon! I saw them on the south wing! Come on!"

Jon's heart stopped a beat when he was startled by Bran balancing over his window bay. He immediately went to his window worryingly.

"Bran! Seven hells! What are you doing? This is very dangerous! Your mother will be furious if she learns that you are climbing up this high!" Jon exclaimed.

"And I take you're the one who is going tell on me?" Bran playfully moved backwards, away from Jon's reach without looking where he was stepping.

"I promise I won't tell your mother, just go down from there this instant!" Jon let out his hand reaching out to Bran.

"You promise?! You can't even talk to mother in giving you hot water for drinking tea!" Little Bran joked.

Jon knew that Bran did not mean to offend him, but that truth can not be hidden even to Bran. And children tend to tell the truth.

"If you fall and something bad happens to you and I'm the last person to see you before you plummet to your death, Lady Catelyn will have my head off and feed it to the goats! Please, Bran. Just take my hand!"

"You're no fun anymore, Jon." Bran said as he took his brother's hand and went in through the window.

"Seeing you brushing elbows with death is not fun at all, little brother."

"Where is your window door?" Bran asked after landing his two feet on the floor.

"It has been gone for two months already, you never noticed it?"

"I have never went to your side of the castle before, Jon. What about the cold? The snow? Winter is coming." Bran asked concerned of him.

"I already had a couple of months worth of practice to endure the frost. Besides I'm not a Snow for nothing." He smiled at his brother's innocent curiosity and genuine concern.

Suddenly the castle bell tolled to signal everyone that the Lord Eddard Stark has finally come home.

"You must go down at the front yard with your family, Bran." Jon said to Bran kneeling before him and trying to arrange the boy's clothes.

"What about you?" Bran asked.

"I'll follow along. I have to take a minute to thank the Gods for father's safe ride home."

"Thank the Gods for my climbing too, brother! That is the highest I've ever reached!" Bran said proudly.

"I'll thank the Gods for Lady Stark not seeing you up that high, little Lord. And I got to keep my head for another day." he smiled lovingly at his brother.