Disclaimer: I don't own Katekyo Hitman Rebon!
It was an accident. That was all it really was... a mixture of carelessness and bad luck. And if you looked at it logically you would see that, no, even thought both parties would later blame the other for the whole thing, it wasn't really anyone's fault. Right now, it didn't really seem to matter though.
For at the moment, they had to find a solution to the problem in front of them... namely the light pink, soft but so horribly sticky, mass of chewing hell entangled in strands of raven black hair.
Xanxus was snoring softly as he sat comfortably sprawled out on his 'throne', his mouth slightly open, rhythmically breathing in and out. An empty glass that had once contained red wine had been left forgotten on the table next to him and he seemed to be completely at ease. Belphegor and Squalo, on the other hand, were simply standing just a few meters away from him, and they looked anything but comfortable and relaxed... they merely stood there, in complete and utter silence for once, and they exchanged looks.
Yes. There was a piece of chewing gum in Xanxus' hair. A. Fucking. Piece. Of. Gum.
Despite what would later be said, it wasn't really anyone's fault... maybe coming into Xanxus' room in the first place had been the mistake. Then again, they had to, since it was mandatory to report to him after missions... maybe it was that shop owner back in Cosenza that shouldn't have smiled down at Bel, saying something along the lines of "what a cute little brother you have there, son" and shoving a pack of pink bubblegum in the child's hand. Perhaps it would've been a good idea of Bel not to annoy and tease Squalo so much (but who was he kidding, irritating Squalo was simply one of the biggest joys in this new life of his, away from his country and castle)... or maybe, just maybe, if the fourteen-year-old swordsman called Squalo had had somewhat more patience, he might've realized that slapping the back of the kid's head with his newly written report about the mission, especially when said kid was standing right of their sleeping boss, chewing a piece of gum obnoxiously loudly... couldn't have ended well.
And it didn't, the eight-year-old self-proclaimed prince almost choked on the chewing gum, and for a moment he spluttered,coughing and hacking until he finally managed to spit it out... right in his sleeping boss's hair, unfortunately.
Which led them to their current predicament... what the heck were they supposed now?
They sure as hell couldn't just leave it there... and it would be even more dangerous to simply outright tell Xanxus.
"Um... we could try pulling it out...?" The young blonde questioned the older male, licking his lips nervously as he looked up at him with a questioning kind of look written in his hidden eyes. Yes, he was nervous... but who wouldn't? This was Xanxus in whose hair they had just managed to get a piece of bubblegum stuck.
His silver-haired partner in crime scowled.
"That thing has your saliva all over it...!" He made a face that could not be described as anything else other than disgust, "I'm not touching that."
"Then what do you suggest we do? I'm sure Boss would simply love to wake up with a piece of pink gum in his hair, peasant."
"And whose fault do you think that would be, Bel?"
"You were the one that hit the prince!" The child indignantly pointed out. "None of this would've happened if you thought before you acted."
"Oh blame me now, why don't you! You little brat, I should just-"
Both of them suddenly stopped arguing, the room being plunged into complete silence as a grunt came from Xanxus. For a couple a seconds it seemed like the tension hanging in the air could literally be touched, maybe even cut through with one of Bel's peculiar little knives. Both of them almost stopped breathing as their eyes focused on their boss.
The man only shifted thankfully, not seeming to have been awoken from his slumber despite all the noise. The two assassins under his command let out a relieved sigh, then promptly continued to glare at each other, though this time around they made sure not to make any noise.
"Well... there's also something else we can do..." Bel shrugged, a little grin appearing on his lips as he pulled one of his knives out of his pocket.
What the hell possessed Squalo to agree with that god awful, simply horrible, idea... the teenager couldn't tell you. All he knew was that two minutes later he and the 8-year-old prince that had just recently joined their ranks were standing in front of Xanxus, hovering over his dark hair with knives and scissors in their respective hands.
"Voooii- this shit looks easier in movies!"
"Shishishi, look Squalo, the gum sticks to the prince's knives...!"
"We're supposed to be taking that shit out of Xanxus's hair! Why the fuck are you hovering over his eyebrows like a freaking lunatic?!"
"Killjoy."
"Chop chop chop chop chop-"
"Bel, Shut up."
" ' . . ."
"Ooops, ushishi~ that wasn't meant to be cut off..."
"Now it's uneven!"
"That's disgusting, Bel! Don't throw that fucking thing at me!"
"Voooooiii! Fuck this shit! I'm just cutting off the whole area around that stupid chewing gum!"
"..."
"..."
"Now it's even more uneven, peasant. Ushishi!"
"Shut up and help!"
"I was talking about the fringe, brat! The fucking fringe! Do you have some freaky fetish with eyebrows, or what?!"
"If you stick out your tongue at me again I swear I'll-"
"Ushishi~"
"..."
Squalo looked at Bel, who in turn was looking back at him (or his head was tilted in his way at least, if he was actually looking, the swordsman could not tell). They both looked over to Xanxus... his new haircut, and back at each other. Xanxus' haircut. Each other. Xanxus' haircut. Each other. Xanxus' haircut. Each other.
"Uhhh..."
"We should get out of here. Before Boss wakes up."
"Yes."
For some reason, as Xanxus awoke from his short nap about an hour later, his head felt... strangely lighter. He couldn't exactly pinpoint the reason, but he simply shrugged it off in favour of looking at the wine glass on his desk...
Fuck. His mouth felt dry... glaring at the glass on his desk, as if it would be magically filled like that, he took a moment to simply curse every soul in this castle. Not that it was their fault he had no alcohol left... no, but it made him feel better about the whole ordeal.
Taking his glass, the Varia's dark-haired boss left his room in order to get a refill... and he couldn't help but notice... the looks.
He sent a glare in the direction of some of Levi's men who had openly been staring... same for a maid whom he happened to by-pass. The grunts immediately scattered, the maid ran into a door...
And reactions didn't seem to get any better the further he got.
Somewhere along the way, he walked into Lussuria, who let out a dramatic gasp the moment he saw him and quickly scurried off in the direction he came from, looking severely distraught and muttering something about hair and "fashion suicide". He didn't pay it much attention, Lussuria had a tendency to be rather... dramatic, after all...
Levi's eyes widened the moment he saw Xanxus (they happened to meet each other while going down the stairs), and he seemed to go in some sort of epileptic shock, much worse than even Lussuria's reaction. He stuttered out a few sounds... but none of it was coherent. Xanxus ignored him and walked on.
Mammon, who had been sitting in the kitchen, seemed to stop punching in numbers in her calculator for a millisecond as she saw him, her tiny mouth dropping open in what could only be described as shock. It was all gone the next moment though and she merely asked how he was doing, going on with her calculations.
The Varia's boss ignored it and simply grabbed himself a bottle of wine before returning to his own room, glaring at some more people on his way there.
It wasn't until he suddenly happened to pass by a mirror that was for some unfathomable reason hanging in his office room that Xanxus realized just what was so wrong.
His hair.
…
He stared.
…
And stared.
And- what the fuck had happened to it?
It was styled in this hideous military buzz haircut... or that was what it looked most like at least. Even that couldn't exactly describe it. In all honesty it simply looked like someone had taken a couple of gardening tools and decided to have throw a party on his head.
What. The. Fuck.
His eyes fell on the strands of black hair lying all around his armchair, cut off and mutilated in the weirdest ways imaginable... he hadn't noticed them before, much too focused on getting some wine- and was that... a chewing gum?
He felt his eyebrow twitch as his dark red swept the floor once more, only to settle on a strand of hair that stood out... a strand of hair that, unlike all others, wasn't coal black... but silvery white instead.
His eyebrow twitched again.
"TRASH!"
"Voooi, shut up and get out, brat... I don't have the patience to deal with you right now."
Bel simply snickered as he sat in the chair next to Squalo's hospital bed, his legs not quite reaching the ground as he kicked them back and forth. He completely ignored the other's words. He blew a big pink bubble with his gum and though he grinned, Squalo grimaced when it popped.
"Ushishi~ you should've watched out for evidence."
"Just shut up. And spit that thing out. I don't want it- VOOOOIII! NOT ON ME, BEL!"
"Ooops, my bad~" The prince hopped off his chair, his grin making it quite obvious this was no mistake.
"DON'T JUST LEAVE, YOU LITTLE BRAT, GET IT OFF MY HAIR! VOOOOII! BEL, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOU LITTLE-"
The door slammed shut. And Squalo wondered, why the fuck had they ever allowed that little devil in the team?
Sooo... I've got no idea where this came from XD I was just listening to Mr. Mom by Lonestar and it just came to me... while getting back from a visit to the dentist. Yes, I'm a weird person. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it (as random as it was) and please take the time to leave a review, they're very much appreciated!
:)