Hungry Bird, Lost Wolf
Summary: She would stare silently after his retreating back day after day. Neither could leave Grimmauld Place for very different reasons. The Ministry was looking for him for crimes he never commited. She had to stay because it wasn't safe to go back to Hogwarts this year, her parents had put her in his care to keep her safe. Ginny wasn't entirely sure that she was the one that had to be kept safe in this situation.
Entry in the Ravishing Romance Compeition, level Hard Hat Hefties. (literally first fic of mine entered into a competition) Hope everyone enjoys it! And yes, it's set in seventh year so Sirius has mysteriously survived!
The room was lit by a single candle, the flame flickering back and forth making the shadows dance back and forth in a dizzying waltz. Her eyes never left the burned out mark on the wall. Ginny had situated herself in the family tree room ever since she woke up that night. She couldn't make herself turn away from the blackened face and name of Sirius Black.
He had gone up to his room this evening. Last evening? She wasn't sure if it was late into the night or just early into the morning now. His eyes were empty whenever he turned away from her, showing his real feelings. He just put up a front that he was happy being here for her benefit. She knew he wanted to go out again, roam the world. But he couldn't, and neither could she.
That lonely aura that seeped from him seemed to call to her. Ever since she first saw him. First came to Grindlewald because the Order of the Pheonix had needed to hold their meetings in a secure location. He had offered up his home to them but that was it. He still looked sad, even if he didn't look so quite drained of life like Harry had described when him and his friends saw his god father for the first time. He wasn't as skinny either, but his skin was pale from being indoors. His eyes distant as if reliving his memories any second he could.
He seemed so lost when he looked out the window with the curtains closed. They always stayed closed-for safety reasons. Not even able to look out on the world from the confines of his own home.
She sighed softly. The candle she held infront of her trembled with the breath, threatening to sputter out. So she wouldn't even be able to see the place where he used to be accepted by his family. Up until he left for the Potter's house. Then his mother had burned him from the family, quite literally.
A wave of sadness came over her. It was hardly what one could call a nice past. Having been tricked into a traitor friend's place in Azkaban. She was glad she had never personally met a Dementor, so she didn't know the pain he had gone through with having anything happy sucked from him for years. It was no wonder he was the way he was now.
An impentrable wall.
Even so, she would raise her head to watch him leave a room each time. It was the only time she could stare at him so blatantly and not draw attenssion to herself. To see him being miserable in here was tearing her apart. She'd seen a smile before, when Harry arrived back in fourth year. She wished she could make him smile like that by just being there.
Take away any pain he had, make his eyes brighten with a newfound sparkle, see that smile, for his face to light up whenever she was near. She wanted him. She wanted for him to want her.
Ginny Weasely wanted Sirius Black to love her. Unconditionally.
To just feel the same way about her as she did him. He probably wouldn't draw most girls gaze to him, but there was something about him that drew her in. His raggey dog like appreance, the way he spoke.
Oh, how she loved his voice. It was just so damn sexy. Every word, syllable that slipped from his lips. It drove her crazy when he just sat there, reading a book or staring off into space. She wanted to hear him speak every minute of the day but he was silent more often than not.
She had become attuned to his body language as well after having to be in the same house with him for months. Only half the school semester had gone by. No one came to visit on Christmas. To busy dealing with Voldemort. While the Ministry looked for any Azkaban escapees. That's why he had to stay here. She liked it though. That he was stuck here with her. All because her parents were being overprotective after what happened to one of her brothers. That and Ron had disapeared with Harry and Hermione the next day. They were probably terrified that they would lose another child.
A place all to herself, with just her and Sirius. She should make a move.
It's not like he would. She wasn't even sure if he had noticed that she was becoming a woman, much less if he was interested in her. Having never seen him interested in someone before she couldn't tell, and his behavior was the same from the first day she got here.
It was maddening.
It made her want to raise her hands and pull at her ginger hair until even the roots were gone. Not knowing if he felt the same for her. If he even noticed her that way. If he... if he...
A groan of frustration slipped past her lips. She wanted to shout or scream but then she might wake him up. Her tongue flitted out to lick at her dry lips. When he woke up his hair must be super messy, oh, to run her fingers through the curls. That would be heaven.
She imagined his lips would be soft unlike his rough appearance. Like velvet.
The room had darkened when she came back from her thoughts and she glanced at the flame infront of her. It was almost gone. So tiny that only a few inches past it were viewable. She lowered the flame from infront of her face as she stood back up not wanting it to die out before she got to her room.
Ginny slipped through the crack between the door and wall moving a hand behind her to grab the knob and pull the door closed. It made a soft thud and she froze for a moment at the sound glancing around blindly before moving forward into the murky black waters. She felt like one of those boats searching for a safe place to land on shore. A hand was raised infront of her so she wouldn't run into a wall or something. She felt it land on a drawer infront of her and slowly moved around the furniture that was situated against the wall of the hall.
The candle burned out barely a second after she had gotten around it. She cursed silently. Damn candle. It was completely dark now. She reached behind her slowly till her fingers met with the drawer and she set the candle down ontop of it with her other hand. Sliding her hands to the back until they met the wall she started forward again trying to remember the layout of the house. She knew her room was a floor above her but she still needed to find the staircase. Her fingers brushed against a heavy fabric just as her foot landed on something small and circular.
Ginny fell forward with a yelp, tripping over the object. She dug her fingers into the fabric as she fell hoping it would stop her fall but it just kept coming down with her. With a thump she hit the floor and released a pained moan. Her sound was drowned out by the screaming above her though,
"Blood traitor! Dishonorable child scum! Filth! Get out of my house!"
"Ah," Ginny slapped her hands over her ears as if it could help dull the sound of Walburga Black's screeching portrait. She could hear a battering above her, feet, rushing down the stairs. There was a light coming from just ahead, bobbing down the stairs just at one point. A lumos spell. She immedietly regretted leaving her own wand on her nightstand.
"Shut up you wretched woman!" Sirius countered the portraits words grabbing the curtain that had fallen ontop of Ginny. He blinked down at her seeming surpised to see her there but turned back to Walburga Black to throw the curtain back over the painting. It quited back down after a few seconds. She was sure that curtain was enchanted to keep the sounds away or to force portrait to sleep. "Here." She looked up to see Sirius standing infront of her extending a hand down to her. Her skin prickled at just the idea of fitting her own into his and she raised her own to have his fingers slip past her hand and wrap around her wrist to pull her up. There was a stinge of disapointment in her palm. Once she was back up he asked, "What are you doing up at this hour?"
She fought the urge to bite down on her lip. It's not like she could tell him that she had been in his family tree room thinking about him. "I couldn't sleep so I was heading for the kitchen." At his slightly non convinced look she added quickly, "I forgot my wand on my nightstand."
He nodded his head while letting go of her wrist. "Come on then." Sirius walked forward down the hall, his own wand still alight as he headed for the kitchen. Ginny just wanted to curl up into a ball. She felt like she might die from embaressement. It had been stupid to forget the wand, then she wouldn't have interupted his sleep or whatever he may have been doing.
She walked after him, staying behind so her gaze could run down his clothed back. A frown appeared on her face though when she noticed he was wearing a robe and therefore hiding most of his features, nevermind his body type. Black robes that rolled like waves around his feet with every movement. To dark for her to see the body beneath in the slightest way. He had developed a layer of muscle since his time in Azkaban. That, and he actually at now adays so didn't look like the skin-and-bone man Harry first described him as.
Exercising was one of the few things he could do in the house to pass the time. She had watched him before. When he turned into the kitchen she quickly sprinted ahead to catch up, following him into the room. She liked to watch him when he did that. Mostly because he was shirtless and it was one of the few times she could see more of him-"Gin, you hungry for anything?"
She was propelled from her thoughts back to the present by his words, his voice. His lovely hypnotic voice. "Yes, yo-gurt please." She had almost said you having barely stopped herself in time. Her shoulders relaxed when he didn't seem to have noticed the pause within the word. Though she longed to tell him that she loved him, she wasn't entirely sure how.
He came back from the fridge with a cup of yogurt with a spoon sticking out and handed it to her. Her breath gave a small hitch when his fingers brushed hers and she quickly glanced down to hide the blush that she could feel starting to show through her pale skin. "Thank you." she blurted then spun around and walked from the kitchen forcing herself not to run.
Had she given it away by doing that? She wondered as she hurried up the stairs. Did he feel the same tugging she felt whenever he was near at her heart strings? Her feet hit the steps, quick and soft as she hurried up them to turn onto the second landing and make her way to her room. Once inside the closed the door firmly behind her and went to sit on her bed, holding the cup of yogurt in her trembling hands. She swallowed down air, staring at it. A very simple reason for her to touch him in the slightest way.
In the number of months she had been here it was the only time their skin had touched in passing. She had worked hard at the beginning so that it didn't happen. Having felt a pull toward him even before she got stuck here. It was the main reason she had asked her parents to let her go back to Hogwarts. Atleast that way he would be safe from her. She had thought she could deal with the close quarters but now...
Ginny set the still full cup down on her dresser. What was she suppose to do now? She wanted to go back out there and do more than just brush fingers. She wanted to be able to sit down and talk to him without having to worry if a blush rose to her face. To not have to hide her feelings for him. She wriggled on the edge of the bed, fighting with herself to stay sitting or get up and open the door.
She sat there for barely a minute before she pushed herself up and approached the door. Her hand hesitated over the door knob though and she turned to walk over to the nightstand and grab her wand before moving back towards the door. "Lumos." she whispered and a soft light appeared at the end of her wand, not to bright, just enough for her to see clearly where she was going. Twisting the knob she opened the door to slip back out into the hall. She froze when she saw Sirius standing across from the door against the wall.
"Um," she glanced around as she started to panic. What was he doing here? "I was just going to the bathroom." Making up a quick excuse seemed to be the best way to get out of-no! She wanted to... tell him. The fact that he was standing there was convienent though. When he just blinked at her Ginny didn't move, just watched him. "What are you doing here?" she asked.
"You left this downstairs." As he said the words her heart sank. She had been silently wishing he was there for her, but then he was handing her the candle holder her source of light from before that had died out on her.
Still, she reached out and took it from him being sure to have her fingers touch his slightly in the exchange as if by pure accident like in the kitchen. "I'll put it back where I got it." she heard herself saying as her fingers wrapped around it. Her pinky went forward tentatively to brush along his wrist, lingering as she tried to sate the growing thirst in herself. She withdrew her hand and turned back into the room to put the object down, coming back to the door to find he was gone again, though she could hear his soft footsteps.
After biting at her lip for a good minute she decided to follow. "Nox." she whispered so the light was out and she treaded in his footsteps over to the library. It wasn't the biggest out there and certainly wasn't very decorative, or rather it probably was. If you got rid of the layers of dust that is. If her mother was here she would have forced her to clean the room at some point without magic. As it happened she was not, and Ginny was rather grateful for that. The fireplace had been lit and she stopped short to listen for voices wondering if he was communicating with someone. Hearing none she continued forward, stopping once more when she caught sight of him sitting in a chair with a book, the area lit only by the fireplace. She breathed in and out slowly as she gathered up the courage to walk further. Sensing herself starting to back out again she stepped forward into the light and muttered out a, "Sirius?"
His head turned toward her, obviously surprised to see her standing between the shelves of old books. "Still not able to sleep?" he asked, the fire reflecting in his eyes as he looked at her.
"N-no." She swallowed nervously when she stuttered then shook her head at his assumption of why she was there. "I wanted to... talk to you about something."
"Oh, what is it?' Sirius asked, he set the book aside, lounging back into the chair as he watched her. His hands settled on either arm of the chair. The way he looked then was breathtaking in itself.
Having his full attention now practically sent thrills down her body and she had to fight a blush from creeping up to the surface. "It's..." she began to only trail off. Do it already! She told herself. Taking in a small breath hoping he wouldn't notice she walked forward toward him as she started speaking again. "I guess it would be more accurate to say I want to dicusss something with you. It's just that I've been wondering a lot about this one little issue. Actually every night." she mumbled that last part before clearing her voice, "The thing is, I kind of, maybe, definetly, like you. I just wondered if you might feel the uh same?" She had come to stand infront of him at that last word and forced herself to look into his eyes.
For a second she thought she saw a hint of satisfaction in his eyes but then it was gone. "That's a bit more of a declaration Ginny." A slight pause and then, "Don't you like Harry? You two did start going out the summer before sixth year. He never said anything about the two of you breaking up."
She could feel a frown slowly settling over her face. He hadn't said anything back to her and was talking about Harry of all things. Sure, they had gone out, but it really hadn't lasted longer than a few months. "It was just for a little while, we didn't really see the need to announce that we weren't anymore during school. It just makes people talk and gossip fly about. Besides, I liked you before I liked Harry." She confessed. Without so much as waiting for a proper response she walked further forward-probably invading his personal bubble-so that her feet were touching the front of his shoes, and consequenetly his feet. "You never answered my question." Leaning forward she reached out to place her hands ontop of his before crawling up onto his lap, legs dangling off the front of the cushion and spread so his own were between hers. "Do you like me Sirius?" Her hands trailed up his arms to rest on his shoulders as she balanced herself there.
His eyes had widened the moment she started moving closer to him and ended up straddling his lap. "Ginny, don't you think this is a bit-" She leaned forward in that moment to press the length of her body against his in just her nightgown. "If your parents decided to check on you right now you realize you would have to leave right?" She blinked at his words, knowing that was true. In this compromising situation they would assume it was him rather than her that was being so forward. She almost surprised herself with it. They did come in unannounced more often than not as well. The time of day had never mattered to them.
"Sor-" she began to have the words silenced when his lips brushed against hers. For a second she was to stunned to speak, his arms had moved from the chair to wrap around her and she practically jumped when she noticed this. But another part of her was quickly growing happy. "So you do like me?" she asked hopefully.
He gave a nod of his head and an answer, "Yes, Gin. I love you. Just wished you had let me know about this sooner. I thought you were interested in my god son or other boys your age. If I had known, I would have said something." There was a slight pause and then, "Your parents will probably be upset by this."
Ginny bit her lip. That was true as well. "I don't care. I want to be with you. Even if mom and dad don't like it. I want you. I love you Sirius." Her hands moved to the back of his neck as she drew him in for a proper kiss, their first kiss.