Fenris watched as Hawke talked with the others in the Hanged Man. He knew that he should't watch her, she wasn't his since he left her, but even now he just wished to be in her arms. He wanted to claim those tantalizing lips, pursed ever so slightly as she talked with that abomination.
Fenris could tell that the abomination cared for her, and he tried to convince himself that that was the reason he kept staring at her, to watch over her so she didn't make a mistake.
He saw how it's corrupted hand every so slightly tried to linger on her skin. Those small touches, the way that Hawke let them pass, made Fenris's mouth twitch in anger. He kept his cup of alcohol tightly in his grip, taking a sip whenever he noticed those touches.
As if that wasn't enough, Isabella kept coming over and wouldn't stop flirting with Hawke. Fenris saw how Isabella's demeanor changed, into a more serious type, as she shamelessly made moves on Hawke, not that Isabella had any shame in the first place.
One on each side, Fenris gripped his cup so hard that it shattered. The shards cut into his skin and the liquid splattered across the floor. He watched as his blood slowly seeped out of the cuts and dripped to the floor. He could see someone approaching, but he didn't want to look up to see who it was. Fenris didn't want to admit that Hawke wasn't his anymore, but after watching everyone else flirt with her all he felt was anger.
Her voice registered just as her hands encased his, and he felt the electric spark. Fenris looked up into her worried face, and into her brilliant eyes which showed nothing but her concern for him. His heart sped up at her closeness and he felt that warming sensation of her healing magic. He felt a tug at the corner of his lips and thanked her for her concern. Her hands tightened around his for a second before she let go, and he felt his heart drop as she walked away.
Fenris resisted the urge to pull her back and and hold her in his arms and claim those plump lips of hers, to trail his fingers across her back and cup her butt, to have his tongue swirling inside hers. Now, more than ever, he wished he had never left her that night all those years ago. That touch of hers was as addictive as lyrium is to templars, and he craved her so much. He dreamed of nothing but her every night, feeling all those emotions again only to find it a dream. Fenris could still feel a phantom of her touch across his skin even after he woke up, haunting him as he wished for the real thing.
Hawke sat down at her spot again, looking at Fenris one last time before she chatted with their companions again. Her laugh echoed in his head, and he wished for nothing more than to hear her laugh with him, not with those others.
She acted as if nothing ever happened, not even that night when they were together. She never questioned him, and he never left her side but the damage was done. She kept some distance from him, and every time she moved away, he felt anger take over again. That one choice he made kept them farther apart. He saw the toll it took on her, from the bags under her eyes and how she wouldn't smile wholeheartedly. Every time he saw that, Fenris's heart felt like it was being wretched out with a spoon, one scoop at a time.
He saw her shift to Isabella for comfort. Nothing seemed to help until he heard that she slept with Isabella. That rage he felt then, nothing would have survived if Hawke didn't show up at the mansion to check on him. He felt more than saw his lyrium markings glow and by the time he could actually see past his anger, the walls were cut and crumbling in a couple rooms. He didn't see any of that, because what caught his attention was Hawke with cuts along her arms and her robe had slight rips as well. He froze in terror, realizing that it was he who had harmed her. He watched as she healed her wounds and silently left. He had watched her leave.
It was then that he went to the Hanged Man to find that wench. His anger, instead of on Hawke and Isabella was to himself. He knew his anger was what caused all of her pain, but finding out that she slept with Isabella scarred him much more than he ever thought scars could reach. Fenris could imagine his hands wrapped tightly across her tanned skin and watching as he saw the light leave her eyes. When he had finally found Isabella, she was talking with Hawke. Her stare held his for a moment before she turned back to Isabella. His heart was ripping to pieces every time he saw her, and he thought of how it was only her that could hurt him this much. Forgetting Isabella, he ordered a drink, keeping his eyes on Hawke the whole time and thought of ways to express how sorry he was for hurting her. Every excuse died as he watched her though. She ignored his piercing stares and left with that abomination carrying her, with it's hands hugging her close. He wouldn't stand for that, and he felt his anger reappearing and aimed at it's hands holding her close so she wouldn't stumble.
He didn't know how he found himself beside them, but Fenris found himself taking her away, saying that he would take her home. Shifting his weight as he felt hers, all the anger washed away. She fit just perfectly and he tried to focus on taking her home, but he found himself at the door of his mansion. Looking at the sky, he knew it would not be smart to head back, and he was lucky that he had a bed for her. He knew it was just an excuse in his head to keep her close, but he wanted to make it up to her. Opening the door and through to his bedroom, he placed her gently and tenderly down. She was unconscious, from all of the drinks she had. Her head fell limply into his pillow, and he smelled her unique scent, of fresh fruit peeled and ready to eat. He loved her scent, and just having her lying on his sheets, her essence seeping into what little he owned, made his heart beat wildly.
A tear fell down from her closed eyes and he hesitated to wipe it away. Removing his gauntlets, he gingerly wiped her tear away. His name escaped from her lips, and he felt crushed when he heard her pleading tone. He knew he should have left her alone, but against what his mind said he stayed by her side and fell asleep at the foot of the bed.
He woke up to feel a light touch, her touch, stroking his hair. She was talking to herself, and he acted as if he was still asleep. It was then that he heard her say that she still loved him. His heart skipped a beat and he tensed slightly, which she felt and immediately stopped what she was doing. Reluctantly, he lifted his head and met her stare.
Hawke stared at him, unsure what to do and of how much her heard. Fenris stared at her as well, knowing that it was he who hurt her so deeply, yet she still loved him. He felt his face loosen, loose the stoic facade, and saw as she tensed.
"I believe I love you too, Hawke." She looked stunned, but it changed into a smile and she cried while she hugged him. Fenris felt whole with her at his side, and he pulled her back, capturing her lips just as he did those years ago. He felt her surprise before she enthusiastically kissed him back.
"Please don't leave me again, I don't think I can take it a second time." Her voice was filled with pain as she pulled away to tell him this. He lifted his hand to caress her cheek.
"I am forever yours."
