OK I was looking at my old stories, and I noticed how insanely crappily written this was. so I re-wrote it. it is from Bella's pov, and set after graduation, just before they are going off to collage.
enjoy.
Edward parked the car in front of the Seattle book store. I'd asked him to come up here with me because I had run out of books to read. we got out of the car and walked in to the store. they seemed to have a huge display up about some series called 'Twilight' I decided to try and find the book, to see what all the fuss was about. i looked all over the store but they wasn't even one copy. this thing must be pretty popular, i thought. just then, the shop assistant came up to me
"can I help you with anything?" she asked politely
"um yes thanks, I'm looking for Twilight?" I responded
"well we don't have any of for sale left at the moment, but you can put your name on the wait list" she told me
"oh, that's OK. I didn't want to buy it, I just wanted to look at the blurb" I said
"well then you can have a look at the store's copy" she said
she brought the book out from the back and I thanked her. it had a black cover with a pair a pale white hands holding a bright red apple. I sat on one of the chairs and started reading the blurb
~when Isabella swan moves to the gloomy town of forks and meets the mysterious alluring Edward Cullen' wait what? 'her life takes a thrilling and terrifying turn. with his porcelain skin, golden eyes, memorising voice and supernatural gift...~
but i didn't get to finish reading it, because I was too busy chucking 'Twilight' it to the air and running away screaming. I turned around and noticed that everyone was looking at me as if I was a complicate psycho. Bad, bad, stupid move. Me being me, i managed to trip over my own feet and started to fall. Before i hit the ground, however, before i could hit the bitumen, a pair of strong, cold hands grabbed me.
"what's wrong, Love?" he asked, concerned.
"Th-th-th-the book" I stammered
"What book"
"a book about a Bella Swan moving to Forks and meeting a Vampire called Edward Cullen" i said in a small voice
he gave me a funny look and bundled me in to the car, then speeding away. when we arrived back at his house, he talked to Carlisle. even HE had no idea what was going on. he told us that they would have to move far, far away and might even end up having to hide away from society, until this "Twilight" thing blew over.
"But what about Bella?" asked Esme
"I hadn't thought of that. we might have to turn her now after all" Carlisle replied.
three days later
I woke up on the bed, the pain finally gone. looking around, I saw Edward and broke in to a huge smile. I was like him now, I could be with him forever.
so that's it! I think that it's a lot better than it was (though i DID have a hard time remembering how to spell 'Carlisle', since I haven't read or written anything Twilight in about two years)