Written for the August Picture Prompts from the lj community Time and Chips. The picture was of a sign that said "Warning: Anti-Climb paint on Gates and Fencing"

Disclaimer: The all-powerful BBC owns Doctor Who. I just took them out to my doll house for the day.

From experience, the Doctor knew that screaming was not good. It generally came right before a murder, car crash, or finding someone's mother's skeleton in their closet.

So when he heard a distinctly Rose-like scream coming from the depths of the TARDIS, he was on his feet and running to her room in just under five seconds.

When he got to her room, he could hear Rose in the bathroom gasping "No, no, no, no!" over the running water.

"What is it?" he asked, out of breath. "What's happened?"

Rose turned around and thrust her hands towards his face. "This is what happened!"

He examined her hands; they appeared to be covered in writing, bold, black words that spelled the words "THIEF" over and over again.

"When did this happen?" The Doctor was very careful not to touch her hands, instead putting on his glasses so that he could take a closer look.

"I was washing my hands and the words showed up once I touched the water!"

"Did you touch anything odd while we were in Sydney?"

"No," Rose said. "I mean, there was this fence around the compound that said something about 'anti-climb' paint, but when I started to climb nothing happened, so I thought the sign was just an empty threat." The Doctor's face lit up with realization and he grinned at her. Rose, unable to share his enthusiasm, just snapped "What?"

"Oh, that's brilliant! It was the paint. But it's not really anti-theft; it just identifies the thief afterwards. I'm sure the plan is to round up everyone on the compound after a robbery and pour water on their hands. They'd have found their culprit tout de suite!" He paused for a moment. "I rather like that, tout de suite. It's like allons-y. The French language is highly undervalued in your culture, Rose. It's so much fun to speak. So…bouncy."

"Oh, did they teach you to appreciate French while you were having tea with the benevolent dictator of New South Wales? I must have missed that lesson when I was trying to save you as I was under the impression you'd been kidnapped!"

"No need to be so snappy," the Doctor told her, "I wanted to tell you that I hadn't been kidnapped like we thought, but you didn't have your mobile with you-"

"Because it fell out of my pocket when I was climbing the fence! And this," she looked at her blackened hands, "is what I get in return! I'll probably never be allowed in any shop again. They'll all think that some weird clerk tattooed me after I tried to knick some gum."

"Nah," the Doctor shrugged, "I bet I can get it off. Have you tried soap?" Rose just glared at him. "Okay, so I take it the soap didn't work. Have you tried yelling 'Out, damned spot!' a lot?"

"What?" Rose asked, her voice low and dangerous.

"You know, Lady Macbeth, Act 5, scene 1, from-"

"I've read Macbeth!" she shrieked, "but as I haven't murdered anyone that's not really relevant right now. And if you don't find some way to get rid of this I'm making you fly the TARDIS home so Mum can give you a good slap!"

Rose ended her outburst by collapsing dramatically against the counter. She put her face into her hands and let out a defeated sigh.

"Er, Rose," the Doctor said cautiously, "I wouldn't do that."

"Why?"

"Well," he dipped his hand into the water pooled in the sink and then ran one finger over her cheek. Rose looked over at the mirror.

The Doctor ran out of the bathroom as Rose screamed again, this time at having the word "Thief" inked on her right cheek.