A/U: This is imagionationtrain's friend. I'm obsessed with Invader Zim, and I don't have an account, so here we are. This one is really short and focusses on Zim and Dib, but it's not a ZADR.
Disclaimer: If I owned Invader Zim, this wouldn't be a fan fiction. This would be a freaking episode (that means I don't own it or any of the characters).
Horse Cheese
The rain drummed the metal above him as he cursed silently. He, the mighty and superior Zim, had let Dib get the better of him once again.
"This inferior excuse for a cage cannot hold ZIM for long, filthy pig smelly, and when I escape, you will regret ever bring your big head to my base. I guarantee it." He spat out, eyes narrowing into slits. Dib laughed outside the metal bars, running his finger along one of the dripping rods.
"I hate to break it to you, Zim, but your outside. In the rain." He smirked, flicking some of the rainwater from his finger onto Zim, who hissed when it burned his skin. "Besides, this inferior cage is made of Equus Caseus. That's Latin for alien-repellent. You're stuck in there. And now I can show the whole world you're an alien. Just admit it. I won." Dib's ego was shaken when a soft giggle was heard. It soon broke into a full-blown laughter. He glared at Zim.
"You are far more insolent than I thought," he said, wiping a non-existent tear from his eye when he was done, not noticing the compliment in his insult. "Tell me, where did you get this cage from?" Dib peered at him through the bars, debating on whether or not he should reply. Zim just stood there, grinning in a demeaning manner. Finally, his curiosity got the better of him.
"I bought it on the Internet, but what does that have to do with-"
"SILENCE!" The imprisoned alien shouted, antennae flat against his head in rage. "Do you speak Latin?" he asked, tone changed to one more intuitive and probing.
"No, but-"
"I SAID SILENCE!" Zim screamed.
"But you asked me a question!"
"Zim needs no answers, Dib-filth, I already know. Because if you could speak Latin, you would know that Equus Caseus means 'horse cheese'. And horse cheese," he said, two metal claws coming from his Pak and burning a hole easily through the bars. "Melts," Zim smirked, and then put a finger to his chin. "Well, it melts easier than metal. But no matter! I have escaped. Prepare for a doom far more doomy than any other doom you have faced in all of your doomed life!" he yelled, jumping through he bars, landing in front of the boy, both Pak legs still extended.
"Wait, you know Latin?" Dib asked. Zim smiled devilishly at him, ignoring the question, waiting for him to make the first move. As realization dawned on him, a slow smile formed on the big-headed boy's face.
"Zim?" He said in a singsong voice.
"What?" The alien spat impatiently, fisted hands on his hips.
"It's still raining." Zim looked up and held out his hands.
"Oh yeah." He screamed and flung himself onto the ground, rolling in agony, while Dib laughed at his pain. "I will get my revenge!" he managed to yell, skin burning.
"Sure you will. I got to go." Dib turned and walked away, hands in his pockets, proud of the discomfort he was causing his arch-nemesis. Zim picked up a rock and threw it at him, making the boy fall face first in a puddle.
"REVENGE!"
A/N: Everyone wins in the end! Not really, but whatever. Hope you enjoy, please R/R.