Disclaimers: I do not own Devil May Cry nor Saiyuki.
Alright, so some setting issues before we begin:
Devil May Cry: Takes place after a fictional ending of DMC3 where Dante manages to force Vergil to return to the human world with him. They still don't get along, despite living together, fighting over trivial matters like food and jobs.
Saiyuki: Takes place after Sanzo and company manage to help Kougaiji return to normal. They are on their way west again, and have not met Hazel.
Notes: It helps if you know both of the series relatively well, since I will be making a ridiculous amount of references. Rated for the foul language of both series.
Chapter One: "Ahhh! Hakkai, killed someone!"
It had been a slow-crawling afternoon with rain pouring down by the bucketfuls, the outside world completely void of humans and demons alike. The phone never rang. The walls creaked more than usual, the silence soon having adverse effects on the house's only two occupants. Dante and Vergil had already played so many rounds of pool with that the latter put down his stick in frustration and headed for the shower. Dante merely scoffed; taunting his elder brother wasn't worth it when he had won half as many games as he lost.
Dante stared at the phone as if expecting it to relieve his boredom. When it didn't, he decided to order pizza.
He knew his elder brother hated the stuff, no matter what the topping or time of day it was. The older devil would usually shoot him a look when he walked into the room, contaminated with the scent of tomato sauce and cheese, but remained silent. Dante would smile, push the box towards him and the usual sigh would be dealt before Vergil became silent again, himself biting into a slice of the fattening food. A small click and a flooding of steam later, Vergil was out of the bathroom, clothed in his usual black tank top, golden amulet, with towel over his head (a habit that seemed to be the proper way to leave the shower to both brothers).
Dante eyed Vergil, unconsciously preparing for his usual "guilty as charged but you know you want some" smile. The cold look was shot, but what followed wasn't the usual silent persuasion but a sharp ringing noise that accompanied a fearful downward blow, slicing the pizza box and its contents in half as clean as the desk. He would have been cut neatly in two if Dante didn't possess the reflexes that he did.
"I know you hate it when I order pizza, but did you have to take it out on the desk? Furniture isn't cheap you know. And what the hell, did you bring your sword with you into the shower?" Dante joked, unfazed.
"I was aiming for you," Vergil replied, ignoring the last question.
"What did I do now?"
The silent reply was thrown into his face: grey shirts. Dante stared at, examined, the pile in his hands. No rips, no pizza stains, and they weren't his clothes so accidently leaving his dirty laundry in Vergil's room wasn't the issue.
"What the fuck does this mean?"
"Those were white."
Another look at the clothes. "Oh. Ooohh," Dante realizes, now remembering his late-night clothes washing expedition which fatally included a few of Vergil's delicate pure whites.
"Now you can die in peace can't you?"
"Come on, bro, you can't be seri---"
Dante's words leapt back into his throat as he dodged a quick slash dealt by the Yamato. Vergil's towel barely had the time to flop to the floor before Dante claimed his revolvers from the ruined desk and fired a few rounds. He knew bullets were mere child's play to his brother, but a few moments to retrieve his sword from the wall was too much to ask, especially when Vergil also had the uncanny knack of deflecting the shots wherever he pleased.
One such grazed his ear and the air that followed afterwards was almost as metallic smelling as his blood. The evening had suddenly become more exciting; the ringing in his right ear synchronized with his rush of adrenaline. Vergil was grinning. The bastard; if he wanted to play he should have just said so.
"The stakes?"
"Accompanying Lady on her shopping trips. For a year."
Dante whistled. "I hope your arms don't grow too sore."
"Getting a little ahead of yourself, aren't you?"
"Hey, it never hurts to have a bit of confidence, right?" Dante replies before tossing his guns behind the destroyed property and cracking his knuckles.
"Indeed," Vergil smirks, locking his blade back in its rightful sheathe. It clatters loudly as it collides with the floor behind him.
"Hee hee, perfect!"
Books had seemed to be the perfect solution: she couldn't eat them, nor do any damage or mischief with them. But little did Kougaiji know, when it came to his younger sister, anything and everything was a disaster waiting to happen. After a mouthful of whining and Yaone's failed attempts at convincing the feisty demon, as smoothly as he had rescued her from the chemical-filled test-tube, Kougaiji confined her to the bed.
"Do this for me, will you?" and her brother's softened expression was all it took as she succumbed to her fate for the next week, peeling through pages of old books, eyes barely gracing the words before she was distracted by a yawn, interruptions of food, or some colorful attraction on the wall that she never noticed before.
The fourth day had barely ended before Lirin yelled and threw the book in her hand up in the air in frustration. She frowned and stared at her mortal enemy as it fell open near her feet. Her interest in the old piece of literature, however, was re-sparked with the magical symbol exposed on the page before her. Snatching the book again, her eyes sparkled and mischievous grin—an expression that had been absent for days---danced its way back on her face.
A few days later, Lirin was well enough to venture outdoors, and Yaone found herself in the middle of a nearby forest, nervously watching the young princess trace an obscure looking pattern on the ground with chalk. She dared not question what the pile of what seemed to be furs and fruits on the side was or the identity of the red looking liquid her mistress pours into the earth in the circle's center.
"Are you sure this is safe to do, Lirin-sama?"
"Heh heh, you worry too much! If we send stronger demons to fight Sanzo ikkou, they'll be slowed down, right? Then we'll have more chances to kick their butts!"
"Yes, but…"
"Alright! Now all I have to say this chant and---"
"L-Lirin-sama, the circle!"
"EH? W-why is it glowing already? I didn't even say anything yet!" Lirin yelled as she was snatched from the center of the light. Both of the witnesses braced themselves, staring eye-wide at the now illuminated spectacle. Yaone readies her bombs, just in case. If anything, good things never came out of glowing circles.
He sees stars and swirls, like a child's ice cream sundae, for an instant before his vision focuses. "Lay off the face, will you? Babes won't be impressed with a crooked jaw," Dante spits, running a fast wipe over his mouth. Opposite him, Vergil licks his lips. The taste of dried blood tickles his tongue: sweet, tangy from the iron.
"Cut the bullshit, Dante. You already kicked me in the face. Twice."
"Why don't you do something about it then?" the demon hunter taunts, right palm upward, fingers waving towards his face, the common hand gesture for "bring it on."
Vergil wasn't one to neglect an invitation, but with the sudden lack of friction between his feet and the ground, it was hard to give an answer. Having demonic powers was one thing, transforming into his devil form was another, but floating in mid-air, as both of them were doing now, was seriously some scary, strange magic.
"Whoa! I don't know where the hell you learned this but---"
"Does it look like I'm doing this?!"
A flash of light and the brothers are swallowed whole. The floor is free from the Yamato and Ebony and Ivory. The walls continue to creak and the phone rings, but nobody is there to answer the call.
Their last stay at the previous town's inn was more discomforting than relaxing. With the lack of vacancies and futons, the four travelers were forced to share beds with one another.
SMACK! and Hakkai awoke that morning with circles under his eyes, caused from the regular night assaults to his stomach and face from his long-legged companion. THUD! Goku had lifted a leg and Sanzo found himself getting to know the cold morning floor better than he wished too. SMACK! went the paper fan as it collided with the monkey's head; they had no choice but to skip breakfast.
"I'm so hungry!"
"Can it, man. We all are, thanks to a certain bitchy monk."
"You're more than welcome to eat the dirt off the road."
"Don't worry, Goku, the next village…" a yawn, "should be coming up shortly."
"Oi, Hakkai, are you sure you can drive?" Goyjo asks, skeptical.
A small, dry chuckle, "I'll be fine. Besides, this area is pretty clear. There shouldn't be any obsta---"
BAM! Holy shit! Hakkai slammed on the breaks. It was too large to be a bird and too clothed to be a youkai. What the hell?! Was that a human being? Do human beings normally just fall from the sky? Hell if I knew! At least the windshield isn't broken...
It was a pretty traffic accident without the (badly) damaged car and blood and whiplash. The body rolled off the hood of the car and thudded into the sandy ground below.
"Ahhh! Hakkai, killed someone! W-What do we do?! Sanzo--"
A quick smack to the head, "Calm down, you stupid ape!"
Hakkai swiftly jumps out of the car and attends to the man, "Sir! Sir, are you alright?" Hakuryu transforms and Sanzo and company form a circle around the victim, beginning their examination process.
"It seems like he's still breathing," Hakkai informs them in relief.
"Kyuuu…" Hakuryu comments before landing on his owner's shoulder.
"Check out this guy… silver hair."
"Is he human?" Goku asks as he pokes at the specimen with a stick.
"I don't care what he is… hmm?" Sanzo walks over to a gleaming spot on the ground, "Guns?" he mutters to himself as he examines them.
The group is snapped out of their trance when the weapons are tossed onto the ground next to the unconscious man. "Those are…?"
"I assume they are his. So, what do you want to do, Hakkai?"
"I suppose taking him to the next village would be our best option. We don't know when he's going to wake up after all."
Sanzo mutters something about "another annoyance" and back towards the west they went, the extra 'luggage' stored in the back. The backseat occupants fight over who has to give up his space to their new passenger and the usual gun fires. Sanzo threatens to kill them both and throw their carcasses over-board.
At least the unconscious man didn't talk, he notes. Hakkai laughs.
A/N:I've always thought that Saiyuki and Devil May Cry would mix really well, considering I see a whole bunch of parallels between the characters of both series. Plus, Sanzo Ikkou kicks ass, the Sparda brothers kick ass, demons here, demons there, it all works out rather nicely, aha. I'm really exicited to write this story. So... I'm starting off slow, but I hope to get into a more intricate plot later. Coicendentally, I'm also trying a new style of writing with this story, aka less huge paragraphs and being even more precise and to the point yet meaningful. I have this really bad habit of only focusing/developing on one series at a time in chapters, so hopefully I can get rid of that as well. Constructive critisism is more than welcome! R&R!