Disclaimer: We do not own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, but the other random characters belong to US!!!!!!!!

Warning, this fan fic has been written by a Kingdom Hearts lover and a Kingdom Hearts hater. Enjoy!

PLEASE REVIEW!!!!

Seating Chart

FRONT

Mr. Ansem (Mr. A)

Sally-Ben-Jan-Some Kid

Jim-Ken-Riku-Shy Kid..

Beth-Larry-Sora-Cathy

Ann-Becca-Cloud-Cindy

If you can make sense of our seating chart, good for you.

All seems peaceful in Destiny High, until a certain teacher blows into town…..

P.S, Only the characters in the first two rows on the right side of class room will be mentioned in this story, except for Cindy, no one likes her.

Jan: I wonder who our new teacher will be this year.

Cathy: You mean our Health teacher?

All of a sudden, a dark miasma fills the entire classroom, and in walks Mr. Ansem in his black coat…

Cathy: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!(Picks up a random desk, breaks the nearest window and jumps out screaming "Zelda Rules!")

Jan: My name's Jan!

Cathy is heavily sedated and returned to class moments later by the hall patrol.

Ansem: Hello children (He says in a deep, creepy child molesting way) I am your new Health teacher for the semester.

Sora: Is your hair naturally white?

Ansem:…In this class we shall cover the miracle of life...

Class is in total silence, until Cloud walks in with a six pack of beer under his arm.

Cloud: Whoa, hey guys…(Takes a quiet seat behind Sora)

Cathy :( After waking up from her drug induced stupor) Sweet Jeebies! Who gave that man a teaching license?

Ansem: …In other words, sex education.

Jan: Hee Hee! Mr. A said sex!

Ansem: And every time you answer something wrong, Jan, you will die, I mean, uh, Riku will beat you over the head with a bat.

Riku is polishing a baseball bat and lets a maniacal grin slip across his face.

Cathy: Eww, I think I can hear you getting tanner.

The class hears a slight sizzle.

Ansem: Moving on, who can tell me about the male reproductive system?

Some where in the class a beer can opens.

Sora: A repro-whatty?

Ansem: Oh, you will find out.

Cathy: Do you like, use turtle wax your chest or something?

Ansem: ….Maybe….

Jan: I thought you could only use turtle wax for cars.( A baseball bat whacks her in the head from behind.)

Riku: Wrong.

Jan: Why do you hate me?

Cathy throws a random knife at the teacher, who only flicks his head to one side, missing him by inches.

Cathy: Son of a…..

Ansem: Anyway, let's begin class with a small exercise. Pair up. (Hands out papers)

Cloud: I got my partner. (Grabs Sora by the back of the hood, who only squeals.)

As the students are working hard, the teacher's cell phone goes off.

"Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me! Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me! Don't cha….."

Riku: Oh my God….

Cathy: WTF!?

Jan: I like this song! (Another hit from behind, but this time with a hand made club.)

Riku: That's for singing along.

Ansem reaches down below his desk and the class hears a beep noise.

Cathy: Where did he just put his hand at?

Sora: Why did it beep?

Jan: I just got a full view of that….

All of a sudden, the bell rings and the students are safe for now. Well, at least the female students are….

In the next chapter the whole health room embarks on a magical field trip! To where? Nobody really knows. But who cares! Read it anyway! And review….