Author's Note: Yep, this one is short. And so chock full of Angst that it surprised even me. I cannot say much without giving away the characters, although by the end you should know who is who. I will say that it was not my intent to harm Joxer's feelings, but I can see this happening so easily. I had to write it down.
Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to 'Xena: Warrior Princess' or any of the characters. Although, I do have all 6 seasons.
She twitches her shoulders as he rests his hands on them, trying to convince him it is a genuine shiver at his touch. It has been a long day of coveting, like all the others. She lets him move in front of her, not resisting as he removes the armor from her wrists. In a moment of longing, she pulls him to her, feeling him against her and wishing he had done something to deserve this. But as his arms encircle her, she knows that he could leave if he wanted. And maybe it is unfair, and maybe she should just stop it, but he is there, and she is wet and its much harder to pretend when she is by herself. So she stays.
A snapping twig alerts them to their company, and from the moment she looks up, she is caught. She licks her lips from the sheer intensity of that blazing blue gaze, and she's sure that the Warrior knows. She has to know. But she blinks, and the connection is gone. As is her Warrior.
And so she turns back to him, letting his hands glide over her back, around to her bare stomach. She nuzzles her face into his neck, but will not look him in the eye. Nor will she let him kiss her. That is how it has always been. She gives him what he wants on the condition that he leaves when it is over, and doesn't speak of it after. She takes from him what she cannot get where she wants it. And she is not fine with it, and she knows it is wrong, on so many levels, but as he lowers her to the ground, their clothes the only thing between her and the ground, nothing between them, she tells herself that it feels right, even if her body knows that it isn't right at all.
What she wants is not what he has, but right now, she'll take what she can get. And even though it does not feel how her body knows it should, she responds to him. His hands slide around on her chest, his knees forcing her legs apart, and as he presses himself against her, the shiver is less forced.
As he moves within her, she closes her eyes, letting her body feel while her mind sees blue eyes beneath a fringe of black hair. She convinces herself that she is in a different place, a strong arm and probing fingers between her thighs, her legs wrapped around a different pair of hips. She forgets where and what and who she really is doing.
He is gentle with her. More gentle than she deserves, for what she is doing to him. But those blue eyes are gazing at her from behind her eyelids, and she just doesn't have time to worry about him right now. His thrusts become more pronounced, and her back arches, pushing him further into her. Her hands grip his shoulders as they reach their release.
Which brings them to the unspoken rule of this.
He pretends not to hear another's name escape her lips, and she pretends not to see him turn away, trying to hide the pain in his eyes.
A/N: So, there you have it. And, you should really review. Because, I fought with the stupid document manager mess that FanFiction has become on my computer, just so you could read this. :)