Me and Sullivan Down by the Snark Yard

By: The General

Pairing(s): mentions of Nate/Elena, Nate/Chloe
Disclaimer: I do not own the Uncharted series. All characters belong to Naughty Dog, though, is it wrong to wish that Nathan Fillion could play Drake and Bruce Campbell could play Sully? These are good things to ponder, Naughty Dog.
Description: In true Chloe and Sully fashion, snarky banter is traded, jabs are made, and Nate and Elena's newfound relationship is dissected. Takes place at the end of Uncharted 2.
Rating: PG just to cover my bases.
TG/N: I don't know how this keeps happening, where I plan on writing for my OTP in a fandom (Nate/Elena) and end up with tertiary characters being sassy instead (Chloe/Sully). In all fairness to both characters, though, I love them both as much as I love Nate and Elena. To tide me over until November 1, I figured I'd contribute my first piece to the Uncharted fandom. Thanks for reading, and enjoy!

Chloe glanced over at Nate and Elena, huffing in an exasperated sort of way. Her bangs fluttered from the spout of air. "Look at those two," she demanded of Sullivan, who had approached her from Tenzin's cottage. "They're so bloody adorable, I don't know whether I should flail my arms about and have cartoon stars in my eyes or if I should feel irrepressibly ill."

Sully laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "I know the feeling." He crossed his arms over his chest, chancing a look at the embarrassingly happy couple. "Back in the day, it used to be just me and him. We lived the exciting, dangerous and carefree lives of self-declared bachelors. Things were great until the kid had to go and fall in love with the girl. I didn't even want Elena on our boat in the first place, but I'll be damned if she hasn't . . . grown on me."

Chloe turned around, leaning against the stone fence she had been draped over, and used her elbows for support. Her facial expression was one part annoyance and two parts amusement. "I know!" she admitted. Despite herself, she might have smiled. "I can't bring myself to dislike her, even if I wanted to. She's just got so much . . . spunk." She cast a glance over her shoulder briefly. "She's a hell of a scrappy fighter, too, for someone with such small arms. Overall, I'm impressed."

"Ah," Sully commented, an annoying grin on his face. The biting breeze ruffled his hair. "So there's some dislike?"

"No. I believe I said even if—'if' being the operative word here—I wanted to dislike her," she repeated, a hint of annoyance clearly evident in her tone.

"Which means," Sully continued, as he fumbled for his cigars in his inside jacket pocket, "that at one point you contemplated the possibility of disliking her."

Now it was Chloe's turn to laugh. "You know me so well, Sullivan," she drawled sarcastically. "Except . . . hold on! You really don't. None of that is actually true, is it? You had better add lunacy to that ever growing list of diseases plaguing you in your old age. Right next to senility and syphilis."

He sneered at her. "Cute, but when you stop lying through your teeth, sweetheart, get back to me. We have a word for people like you, but I'm too much of a gentleman to use it in present company."

"Please," Chloe deadpanned. She brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes and behind her ear. "I'm in stitches."

"So, in this hypothetical scenario, what is it?" He continued to push, approaching closer to where she was standing. He cut the tip of his cigar off. "Does jealousy get in the way, so you and Elena get into a cat fight and rip each other's clothes off? Because that I would pay to see."

It took all Chloe had in her not to shudder. Instead, she rolled her eyes. "Ugh, Nate was right about you, you know."

Sully flashed a grin at her, his cigar clenched between his teeth. "How so?"

She dug in her back pocket for her lighter and flipped it open; the small flame convulsed in the wind. Sully leaned in for the light. "You're a dirty, old man," she answered.

He puffed on the cigar, a plume of smoke exiting his mouth and nostrils. A heavy scent of spice and tobacco filled the air. In response to her statement, he gave a mock bow and admitted, "I do my best."

They remained silent for a few moments, save for the squelching from Sully puffing on his cigar and the faintest hint of murmuring coming from both Nate and Elena's direction. It really was almost unbelievable how quickly she had come to like—more importantly, respect Elena. At best, she had expected a chilled indifference. Nothing like the snarky introduction she had made about being last year's model. And even though there were a few moments she had been absolutely exasperated with Elena, she couldn't help but admire her tenacious (albeit, slightly naïve) willingness to stick with her convictions. Had the roles been reversed, she would have just left Jeff behind. Maybe it wasn't the best solution, but it had pragmatic value. Chloe had never been one to shy away from making the tough calls. Elena was too idealistic for that; she was too soft.

Still . . . she took exploding shrapnel like a pro. Chloe had to respect her for that one, if nothing else.

Sully interrupted her train of thought by clearing his throat and asking, "So no regrets about—" Chloe stared at him, and he gestured over to both Nate and Elena. "—you know?"

Chloe peered over at the two. Nate had his arm around Elena's shoulders, and both of them were laughing and smiling. Chloe rolled her eyes, though she had a difficult time hiding the grin on her face. "In all actuality," she admitted hesitantly, then firmly, "nah. I mean, Nate and I had a good run, but those types of things don't last forever. Plus, he's so clearly in love with Elena to the point where I've had the strong urge to puke at least four or five times since watching them. How could I possibly deny him his . . . oh, God, I can barely say it without cringing. His . . . 'heart's one, true desire?'" She shuddered involuntarily. "Nate's a good guy; he deserves to be happy. Although, apparently, that means . . . Oi! Get a room, you two! Some of us are particularly disgusted by your very public snogging display! It will most likely result in mental scars."

Nate and Elena proceeded to ignore her. In fact, they increased their amount of physical contact, almost as if to irritate Chloe even more. She had been joking, of course, but still. She wasn't that great of a friend.

Sully seemed to find her response particularly amusing, if his laughter was any indication. He said between clenched teeth and cigar dangling, "I guess you're the hero of this story after all, Frazer." He chuckled. "Never pegged you as the match making type, to be honest."

Chloe pushed off of the stone fence and brushed her jacket off. "Oh, please," she said, sounding mildly outraged. "Clearly, I am the villain in all of this. Traditionally, I would remain embittered and alone, but I would also have access to an insane amount of power. Really, villainy is the way to go. After all: how can heroes be made great if adversity never rises up against them?"

"Hmm," Sully shrugged, falling into step beside her. Their steps alternately crunched grass and pieces of gravel. "You make an interesting point, but I think I can come up with a great use of all that alone time you have. If we just sleep together –"

"Ugh! You are absolutely revolting, Sullivan," Chloe spat, stomping off toward the cottage in indignation.

Sully laughed, his cigar trembling. He continued on after her. "I do my best."