Disclaimer: I don't own any of the beautiful people on this show.
Author's Note: The pliers thing really works. :)
The Baby Project – melia
When Lorelai came home from work on Friday, she nearly killed herself tripping over a diaper bag that was in the middle of the entryway.
"Rory? Is there something I should know?" she called out as she made her way into the house. As she entered the kitchen, Rory looked up from her book.
"Mom, hi! Um, this is a school thing. The administration has recently discovered a hole in our education. Apparently, we are all in danger of being spontaneously impregnated, so each student at Chilton has to take home a "Baby Think it Over". She pointed at a doll, dressed in blue, sitting in a baby carrier on the table. "I have him this weekend. I'm supposed to feed him, change his diaper, name him, take him everywhere I go, and when he cries, I'm supposed to stick this key," she added, holding up her right wrist where the key dangled from a hospital bracelet, "into his back. I can't take the key off, and everything I do is monitored by a computer chip somewhere inside him. So, if I neglect or abuse him, I get a bad mark."
"Whoa, hang on. You're being marked on your parenting abilities? You're sixteen! You aren't supposed to have parenting abilities, because you aren't supposed to be a parent yet! How is this fair?"
"I don't know! Oh, I have to keep a diary, too, and what I say will affect my mark. I'm supposed to ponder the mysteries of parenthood, or something. I can't even think of a name for the thing, how am I supposed to ponder?!"
"Well, let's think of a name for him, and then you'll have a headstart on the pondering thing. How about… it's a boy, right?"
"Yes. Anatomically correct and everything."
Lorelai pulled a face, then brightened. "How about Willy?"
"Eww, mom!"
But Lorelai was on a roll. "Free Willy! Little Willy! Willy Wonka!"
"Mom, stoppit! I'm not naming him Willy. I'll name him… Dean!"
"Oh, naming him after his father? How very traditional."
"Ok, never mind. That would be confusing wouldn't it? Alright, then, I'll name him-"
"Willy." Lorelai whispered. Rory just glared at her. "Hey, Ror, I have an idea. Lemme call Babette."
"No! Don't tell anyone. I don't want anyone to laugh at me. Just my luck to get stuck with this doll."
"Hey, don't talk like that in front of the baby. You'll give him an inferiority complex."
"Mom, it's a doll. It has no feelings."
"I know; you could call him Timmy! 'Cuz, everyone except Tabitha thought that Timmy was just a doll."
"Timmy Gilmore? Blech."
"Timmy, or I call Babette."
Rory thought about this decision for much longer than was absolutely necessary.
"Rory, it's a small town. People will hear about this. Not that it's such a big deal, I mean, woohoo, a doll. I can just see Taylor arranging a town meeting about it."
"Well, could you at least put off calling Babette for a while? I don't want to have to deal with the town cooing at me until tomorrow."
"Alright." Lorelai's brow crinkled as she tried to come up with a different name. Suddenly, her eyes widened and she grinned maniacally. "How about Happy?"
"Happy Gilmore? Mom, you want me to name my child after an Adam Sandler film?!" As if to back her up, the baby started crying. In a flurry of motion, Rory pulled him out of the carrier he had been "sleeping" in, pulled the back of his little blue sweatshirt up, and put the key which was dangling from her wrist into the keyhole in the baby's back. When she turned the key, the crying stopped. Lorelai looked amazed.
"Rory, why didn't you come with a key?"
"That would have been too easy. You know that I live to make your life difficult. Besides, having a key isn't so great. I'm getting a hand cramp."
Lorelai looked carefully at the key that Rory was holding. It was attached to a circle of black elastic cord, which was looped through the red wristband fastened snugly above Rory's right hand. Seeing the discomfort grow on Rory's face, Lorelai had an idea.
"Rory, I'm going to go look for something. Be right back." She exited the kitchen and headed into the living room. Luke's toolbox was sitting on the floor.
"Ok, Burt. Help me out here." Opening the box, Lorelai shuffled through assorted wrenches and screwdrivers before yelling "Aha!" and holding up a pair of needle-nose pliers in triumph. Returning to the kitchen, she showed them to Rory and explained her idea.
"I think that you could hold the key in with the pliers. That way you have something bigger to hold on to, and your hand won't cramp as badly."
Rory took the pliers with her left hand, fitted the grabbers onto the sides of the key, and slowly moved her right hand to hold the grippers. It worked! The baby wasn't crying, and her hand cramp was going away. Rory sighed in relief.
"Thanks, Mom! This is great! He still needs a name, though."
"Casey!"
Rory thought about it for a second, but rejected it because it didn't suit him.
"Oh, you could name him Ricky Martin Gilmore!"
"Mom! That's worse than Happy! I refuse to let you name this child!"
"Well, fine then. I'm going to Babette's, and when I come back, we will find the perfect name for this child."
Before Rory could protest, her mom was out the door. Rory pouted. While she was waiting for her mom to come back, the baby cooed, signaling that it was done crying, and Rory took the key out and put the baby back in his seat. Then Lorelai walked in the door, nose in a book.
"See, I bought this baby name book when I was expecting you, and Babette borrowed it when she had to name the new kitten." Lorelai flipped through the pages quickly, and stopped at the L section. "Hey, call him Lee! Like, I named you after me, and you can take your middle name and make it male, and voila! Problem solved. Hello, Lee!"
"Nah. He doesn't look like a Lee."
For the next hour, Lorelai suggested names, and Rory shot each one down. Finally, they called it quits. When they went to bed, the baby still didn't have a name.
-----
At 6:30 in the morning, the baby started crying. Lorelai woke up immediately, flashing back to 16 years previous when Rory had woken in the night. Blinking twice, Lorelai snapped back to the present. Fully awake, she flipped back her covers and got out of bed. She padded down the hall to Rory's room, where the baby was crying, and surprisingly, Rory was sleeping through the racket.
"Rory. Wake up. The baby is crying." Lorelai shook her daughter, who opened one bleary eye and groaned. "Rory. Key."
Rory sat up and fumbled for the pliers while Lorelai got the baby out of his seat. Within a minute, the baby was silent. Rory still looked a bit crusty, but Lorelai was all perked up. She went out to the kitchen and prepared a cup of coffee for herself and her daughter. When she returned, Rory had dozed off, still holding the pliers in her hand. "Rory. Wake up. I have coffee." That was the magic word. Rory's eyes popped open, and she reached for the cup. The first gulp brought her completely into the world of the awake and aware.
"Thanks, Mom."
"Not a problem. You're lucky; at least he waited until a relatively normal, sane hour to cry. You had a penchant for bawling at 2 AM."
"You'd call 6:30 on Saturday a normal, sane hour? 10 is a normal hour. 6:30 is nuts."
"Aah, quit whining. When Bobo here is done crying, you can go back to sleep."
Rory looked at her cup of coffee, then at her mom. "You gave me coffee. You know I can't sleep after I drink coffee."
Lorelai grinned. "I know. Your other option is to get ready for a long, fun Saturday. One in which, hopefully, we will name this baby."
The baby cooed.
-----
When they walked into Luke's Diner, Rory became the centre of attention. Miss Patty wanted to hold him, and Kirk wanted to know what his name was. As Rory handed the baby to the dance instructor, she answered that as of yet, he didn't have a name. Kirk suggested that the name Daniel was nice. Lorelai agreed, and Rory did too, but Daniel just wasn't quite right. It was half an hour later before they got to sit down. Luke came over, coffee pot in hand.
"Coffee?" He asked as he began pouring a cup for Lorelai.
"Do I have a choice?"
Luke looked surprised. "You mean it? You don't want coffee?"
"Are you kidding? Of course we want coffee. I just wanted to see how you'd react."
Luke rolled his eyes and moved to pour Rory's cup, which is when he saw the baby in its carrier. Miss Patty had completely blocked his view earlier, and he didn't know what she had been talking about.
"Nice doll Rory. Aren't you a bit old to be carrying it around?"
Rory explained (again) the purpose of the school project. Luke nodded. "So, what's its name?"
Rory looked at the doll, and then at the man in flannel standing before her.
"His name is Lucas Daniel Gilmore." Lorelai looked stunned.
"Rory? You're naming it after Luke?!"
Rory nodded. "If that's alright with you, Luke." The man looked slightly shocked but recovered quickly. "Yeah, that's fine." He sounded amazed that anyone would want to name anything after him. Rory explained herself. "Well, Luke makes the best coffee in the world, and he's a good guy, and besides," she added, pointing to the doll, "doesn't he look like a Lucas Daniel?" The two adults looked at it, then at each other, then at Rory. She sat, smiling at their identical looks of amazement. "Lucas Daniel it is. Could I have waffles for breakfast?"
-----
When Rory handed the doll in on Monday morning, this report was tucked in the carrier:
"This weekend has been one of learning for me. It started out shakily, because I couldn't figure out what to name him. Once he had a name, I started to feel more connected to him. I felt responsible, motherly. It made it slightly easier to forgive him when he woke me up three times early on Sunday morning.
This whole weekend has been a real eye-opener for me. In Stars Hollow, everyone knew about me having a baby within two hours. They all dismissed the thought that he could be real, because Rory Gilmore wouldn't do something as regrettable as getting pregnant when she was 16. It really made me think about what my mom went through when I was a baby. No one knew her, so they couldn't just dismiss me as a doll. I was real. I had to be fed and changed, and I was a full-time baby. I only had Lucas for a weekend, and I'm sort of glad that I don't have to take care of him for any longer. I'm glad for the experience, but I wouldn't want to repeat it for a large portion of my life."
Rory handed the baby carrier and diaper bag to the teacher in charge of the Baby Project, who cut the wristband and took the key. Knowing that she was done being a teenage mother forever, Rory sighed happily, adjusted her backpack, and joined the bodies walking through Chilton's halls.