My Feelings for You!

Syaoran Li

When I first saw you

I was afraid to meet you

When I 1st met you

I was afraid to know you

When I knew you

I was afraid to kiss you

When I 1st kissed you

I was afraid to love you

Now that I love you

I'm afraid to lose you!

I love you and I don't know why because you're always hurting me and you take life as a joke. You don't know about my feelings and I know you will never love me back! I don't understand my feelings of love for you and you're completely clueless about my feelings but every time I'm with you I feel happy, every time I talk to you and you answer it makes me smile, every time we touch or hug I get a tingly feeling around me. Every moment I'm not with you I want to talk to you but when I'm with you I have nothing to say. When you were with another girl I would always stay quiet no matter what because I want you to be happy. My feelings are strong but not strong enough to make me tell.

You are my best friend. We share our secrets we play jokes although most end up hurting me. We laugh and talk about anything and all things. We may keep our secrets but they eventually come out whether intended or not. Sometimes for the best but sometimes for the worse. We fight but make up, I can never be mad at you for too long but you never say sorry until we talk. I'm the always the 1 who makes up a conversation and you just stay there and reply. We're really close but you don't seem comfortable and sometimes don't even want to stay long enough to talk. You're completely clueless about some things especially when it comes to girl talk or girls as a whole. You want to know all my secrets when I don't even know all of yours!

I want to make myself not like you to make sure my heart stays whole and doesn't get broken. But how much I try and try the feelings come back. I love you then I don't, but how ever much I try to keep it like that, the feelings I have for you always come back. You are nice to me and that makes me love you. You understand me and that makes me love you. However every time you make a mean comment even as a joke my heart cracks but doesn't break and I don't love you. But then you say sorry and you understand why. You always care for me and give me look which I can't not forgive because I can't help but melt into your hands under that gaze that makes me love you so. I try to keep my heart from breaking but every time it just makes a bigger crack. I know eventually my heart will break but for now I will let it heal and make repairs while I wait for another day to pass. I will wait for the day when I get over you or we're together but either way I will get my heart broken and not be able to repair it on my own. Sometimes I just need to pretend everything is ok, walk away and hold back the tears ;(

I could never in my life hate you but I have considered of breaking the friendship we have together and go our separate ways but seeing your face makes me stay and hold onto what I have until I'm ready to let it go. If I ever did hate you then something terrible must have happened between us that would make me want to kill you. If that day ever came and I didn't talk to you ever again I would wish you all the happiness now before I turn to have hatred towards you. This day might never come but anything could happen in this life of mine and bad things usually do happen.

I say these feelings because these feelings might leave me and I don't want to forget them. I will be moving away sometime in my life and I don't want to forget these feelings I've had or have for you. The feeling I have for you is not something simple like a crush that goes away but I think it is or will be more than that. I think I love you or I have loved you if these feelings have passed. You'll always be in my heart if not in my mind and I want you to know that you are and will always be my first love.

When you get this message it will be when I want to tell you or when I'm ready to tell you the feelings I have or had for you.(Also you're the 1st boy I've cried for)

Love you always,

Sakura Kinomoto

Hey guys I hope you liked it! I wrote this from personal experience because there are some things that make you sad and cry, this is one of them. Please Review.