This fic is dedicated to my friend Jbcjazz. go check out her stuff. she's an amazing writer
Maura sipped her wine as she settled down to relax. The team had a rough case involving a transgendered woman who was killed like a dog by a transphobic preacher. Maura couldn't understand how someone could do that. She sighed and pet her newly acquired Pitbull, Jax.
An hour later Jax was whining and pointing to the stairs. Believing he was hurt she walked to the stairs. She looked at Jax who was just focused on something.
"What's wrong boy?"
Jax ran up the stairs and stopped in front of a closed bedroom. She leaned in and heard crying. Slowly and hesitantly she opened the door and saw Cailin crying. She called out but got no response. She walked closer and grabbed Cailin's wrist. Realizing that there was nothing immediately wrong she reached for a lamp and turned it on. Cailin groaned and sat up.
"Hey sweetie, what's wrong? Jax and I heard you crying."
Cailin turned away from her. Jax came over and sat next to the bed. Maura decided to use her training and access her sister. She grabbed her and took off her shirt, looking for external injuries. Cailin quickly put her arms in front of her chest. Maura noticed but ignored it for now. After finishing and moving to examine the bottom half Cailin spoke.
"I'm fine, just get out!"
Maura pulled back stunned but refused to leave. She used her training to build trust.
"Whatever it is you can tell me. Doctors are good at keeping secrets."
"You can't lie so I can't trust you with this."
Maura sighed and noticed Cailin petting Jax. She asked a lot about his masculinity. Maura answered saying male dogs are more aggressive and dominant than females.
"Dominant…aggressive…" Cailin mumbled.
Maura observed the interaction and smiled. Cailin got up and looked at herself in the door mirror. She sighed and cried.
"You look beautiful dear. Come lay down and talk."
Cailin obeyed and Maura spooned her.
"Good girl." Maura praised. Cailin flinched and growled.
"If you aren't going to answer may I ask?"
"Yes." Cailin responded.
"You don't have any external injuries and-"Maura felt her head. "No fever. No muscle or joint pain. And yet-"Maura sighed. "You show signs of depression and distress."
"Your point?"
"I am a doctor. My job is to diagnosis and cure my patients. You are now my patient but more important you are my family."
Cailin sighed and looked away. "Just leave please."
"No."
"Now since I see no physiological symptoms this must be a psychological case."
Cailin flinched and cried. Maura knew she was closer. Cailin shoved her off.
"Leave me the fuck alone!"
Maura got up and left.
Cailin broke down and returned to the mirror.
"Ugly, stupid worthless body."
She sighed and knelled in front of the door.
"Hey are you o-"
Clunk!
The door hit Cailin's head and she cried in pain. Maura entered and immediately put Cailin on the bed. She got a bag of corn and put it on the girls head. She apologized and then laid back in bed. The student huffed but laid on her sister.
"You know if you have a mental problem there is nothing wrong with it."
"How would you know? You're smart, rich, successful and everyone loves you."
Maura sighed and held the student closer on her chest.
"My wealth is just a lucky break. And I'm intelligent because of my mental disability."
"You're disabled?"
"Mmhh."
"Can I ask with what?"
"I have a lot but this isn't about me."
"Please. A doctor wants to instill trust with her patient. Right?"
"Little tease." Maura said and tickled Cailin. She then sat up and sighed.
"I have autism, bipolar disorder, panic disorder, social phobia and PTSD."
Cailin gasped and held Maura close.
"I'm sorry I asked."
"I don't mind talking about it. I try not to let it affect me."
An alarm on Maura's phone went off.
"One sec ok? Xanax and lithium time."
Maura went to get her pills and Cailin followed her. She saw the amount of bottles Maura has-3. She sighed and realized that if Maura can live with her disability then she can be brave for her.
"I thought autistic people had developmental delays…no offence…"
"Most do but I have a milder form called Asperger's Syndrome. It causes intelligence but social impairment and the social phobia and PTSD have made it worse. That's why I'm training Jax to be a service dog for me."
"Oh."
Maura dropped the pill bottle and was slightly dizzy. Jax grabbed it and handed it to her.
"Good boy."
Jax sat next to Maura on the floor. Cailin sat next to her and sighed.
"You don't have to tell me what is wrong if you don't want."
"Um…You can keep guessing if you want."
"OK."
After about 20 minutes of question and answers Maura felt she was close. She said nothing though waiting for Cailin to admit it. Cailin sighed and didn't want to admit it feeling such shame and fear that Maura would act out.
"Gender dysphoria." Maura mumbled.
"What?"
"You have gender dysphoria."
"Well…I' ...i'm..."
"Yes?"
"I'm trans…" Cailin said then clung to Maura fearing she would leave. Maura smiled and rubbed Cailin's hair.
"That's what gender dysphoria is."
"You ok with it?
"Yeah why wouldn't I be?"
Cailin sighed relieved and pet Jax.
"So um…did you tell anyone else?"
"No. I've been too scared. Do you think people would mind?"
Maura's mind flashed back to the autopsy. Jane was confused about the style of the woman.
"So are people like this queers or something? Like they were too scared to come out as gay so they cut their dicks off?"
"No Jane and if you say something like that again I'll cut you."
"Easy Maura…you're not a gender swapper are you?"
"No."
"Good. Anyone who switches gender is so disgusting."
"Jane. Get out of my lab…NOW!"
"Look I'm just saying. I don't get it."
Maura shoved Jane out and told her not to come back down.
"I'll protect you from any transphobic assholes."
"Thanks. Maybe I should tell the Rizzoli's."
"Um…. maybe that's not a good idea."
"Ok."
Maura got Cailin some candy. They smiled and turned on TV.
"I know a very prominent sex reassignment surgeon. We studied at London medical college together."
"I don't know. I just want to try living as a guy first."
"Well I have a chest binder you can have."
"Thank you. Besides I could never afford surgery."
"I can pull some money from a trust fund. My parents give me more then I need."
"I can't ask that of you."
"Well if you ever change your mind the options always there. She owes me a favor anyway."
Cailin sighed and looked away. Maura picked her up and made Cailin straddle her lap. Looking up, Maura smirked before kissing Cailin's forehead. Cailin slid down and laid on Maura's chest while rough hands stroked her back.
"Your hands aren't soft like other doctors."
"You try breaking ribs and skulls all day."
Cailin laughed and felt better.
"So should I call you he? Like what name would you like?"
"I haven't thought about it really. Can we um not talk about it anymore…I feel weak from today."
"Of course. My little brother."
"My big sister. You know what this means?"
"Hmm."
"We get to go shopping."
"Yay!" Maura exclaimed.
The pair cuddled while Jax and Bass sat at their feet and watched TV.
FIN