"We gained control of many things. But we had to let go of others."

"Oh, uh, s-sorry," Castiel muttered, shutting his book and turning to the other person he has just bumped into. He shyly smiled to him.

"It's fine..." He told Cas, glancing down at The Giver in Castiel's hands. "You've read that one yet?" He motioned to the book.

It was one that Cas had read many times, one of his favorite in fact. He had just been deciding if he should read it once more before he was ran into. He was skimming the pages as if he had never seen it and this was the first time he had picked it up. Most of the wearing on it was from him reading it. he thought about just buying it, but would he really read it that much?

Castiel nodded and handed the book to the boy who stood in front of him. He watched him as he read the back of the book cover.

"You are here a lot, aren't you?" The boy asked Castiel as he flipped through the pages and landed on the first one.

"Yeah... I guess so." Castiel spoke quietly, folding his arms across his chest. He shivered in the cold air that was blowing in right above them. He was glad that he had put on a jacket this morning even though it was going to be almost 70 degrees.

"Every time I'm here, you seem to be." The boy stopped looking at the book and looked up to Cas and smiled. He held out the book to Cas for him to take it back, which he did. "I'm Dean by the way."

"Castiel, nice to meet you Dean." Cas glanced down at the book in his hands. "Are you going to read this?"

"I don't know, should I?" Dean questioned.

"Do you like fiction?" Castiel asked him.

"Yeah."

"Then you'll like it," Castiel gave him the book again. He shoved his hands into his pockets and smiled to Dean.

"Okay... Thanks Cas."

Castiel laughed slightly to himself. Only family had ever called him Cas, and they rarely did at that.

"Well, I have to go..." Castiel started to back away, he repositioned the bag strap that sat on his arm. He didn't have to go, usually he stayed a few hours and just read, but hanging around might make this conversation awkward.

"I'll see you around." Dean said from the isle Cas was just standing in.

Castiel nodded to him and turned towards the door and left.

Outside the library he took a deep breath. He hated talking to strangers even if they were cute strangers. He was more to himself and shy around others, not really the type to just go up and talk to someone he had never met. Even if he did know them, it would be hard for him just to go and start a conversation with them.

Castiel walked home in silence, scrolling through the messages on his phone, coming across the 3 missed calls from his older brother earlier that morning. He would be home in 5 minutes, no need to call back now. He decided that Gabriel just wondered where he was. He never told anyone he was leaving this morning, but he had guessed by now that they had learned that he went to the library every Saturday morning.

He slipped through the front door of his house without a sound. He walked through the kitchen then to the connecting living room. It was quiet in the house, no one was here. Up stairs at his bedroom found a note taped to his door. He grabbed it, crinkling it at the edges as he tightly held held it. In sloppy handwriting read:

Cas,

Not sure where you went bud. Had to take mom to the hospital. Don't worry. Call me when you get home.

-Gabe

Castiel quietly cursed to himself and dug the phone out of his bag, quickly dialing Gabe's number. It rang several times before he answered.

"Cassie?"

"I'm on my way. What happened?!" Cas demanded.

"Not sure, she just seemed to get really weak all of the sudden. I drove her to the hospital and they took her back, that was almost an hour ago." There was a long pause and neither of them spoke. "Where were you? I was worried you had ran off." Gabriel finally asked.

"I went to the library like I do every Saturday, you should know this by now." Cas took in a breath and headed back out the door.

"I totally forgot you did that. I'm sorry Cassie, it's just been a stressful morning. I'll come get you, be there in ten minutes." Gabriel told him. Castiel could hear his car start up in the back ground.

"Okay, be careful. Bye."

"Bye."

Castiel slid his phone back into his pocket. He struggled to as his hands were shaking. He sat down on the front porch stairs and stared out into the open meadow across from his house that ran for several acres over a hill and into the woods. I was property that his grandparents had given them and were told to use wisely. Castiel really couldn't do much with it right now because he was still only fifteen, but he enjoyed sitting over on the other side of the hill and reading where no one would bother him. And now that school was out, he could go there everyday if he really wanted to, and he did.

Cas picked at the peeling paint on the porch as he waited for his older brother to arrive. He ran a hand over the family cat as it approached him, it rubbed against Cas's side then curled up into a ball beside him. He continued to look out into the meadow and pet the cat as he waited.

Finally, Gabriel pulled into their driveway with his new car he had gotten only a few weeks ago. It was a shinny red color, on the inside it had tan leather seating that still held that new car smell.

Castiel jumped from the stairs, startling the sleeping cat. He sent a quiet apology back to the small cat as he walked away. He slid into the car, the cold air from the air conditioning biting through his jacket.

"Could you get it any colder in here?" Castiel asked him as they pulled out of the driveway.

Gabriel just rolled his eyes and kept quiet. On their way, Gabe would look over to Cas and then look away when Castiel look back.

Castiel was afraid there was something he wasn't being told. He instantly shook the idea from his head and slumped farther into the leather seating. He stared out the window as the small town flew by them.

When Gabriel parked the car, Castiel pulled himself from it and began to walk in front of Gabriel towards the hospital. He looked up to the sky that was beginning to fill with dark rain clouds.

Castiel sighed as he walked into the building. The hospital smell hit him as soon as he set one foot inside. Gabriel followed behind him and then began to lead them to the receptionist desk in the middle of the large lobby.

"Amanda Novak." Gabriel told the small girl sitting behind the desk their mom's name.

"She's now in room B4, if you follow that hallway," she pointed to a long hallway of white walls to our right. "Go through the two large doors and it will be on your left."

Gabriel thanked her and began walking, Cas quietly followed behind, moving the strap of his bag farther up into his shoulder.

Sure enough, the fourth door on the left was open. Cas and Gabe filed in and stood by the door.

"Hey kidos," their mom spoke, she sounded healthy,Castiel thought.

"Hey mom," Castiel spoke from behind his brother. It was hard for him to see her like that even though she looked perfectly healthy. It was the same scene he had seen before and would never be able to forget. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, other then I really can't stand for more than five minutes without getting dizzy." She told Castiel.

He just looked to the floor and frowned. Way to make it sound like everything was okay, he thought, digging his hands into his pockets.

"They are going to keep me until they know what's going on. You two should go home though, I'll be fine here." She gave them a quick smile and brushed the loose hair out of her face.

"You sure, I could just take C-" Gabriel protested, stepping forward.

"No, go home. I'm fine." Their mom fought back.

Silence filled the room.

"Okay, I'll be back in the morning." She nodded to Gabriel and with that they left.

The rest of the day consisted of Castiel reading while Gabriel watched some annoying reality tv show. By nine o'clock, Castiel was already in bed, ready for his day to be over.

He closed his eyes and sunk into his pillow. The blankets were pulled up to his chin as he drifted asleep.

A week later, the Doctors still had no clue what was wrong with their mom. And it worried Cas, more than he could of ever though he could worry. He stayed in his room throughout the day and would refuse to go and see her anymore even if Gabriel would beg him to come along. But Castiel didn't want to see her like that again, he just wanted to see her healthy and up and walking, being herself.

It was Monday now, he had skipped his Saturday trip to the library which he was now regretting. He had finished his book on Saturday afternoon and by the time he got ready and walked there, they would have been closed. Today, he decided, he would go out after Gabriel left. Gabe didn't need to know that he would go to the library, but not to see their sick mother.

He slipped out of bed that morning, jumping in the shower quickly before pulling in a t-shirt that read 'Don't Blink,' a pair of black skinny jeans and his red Converse. He grabbed his phone from it's charger and his bag off his desk chair and headed out the front door.

I was a lot warmer today than it had been the past few days. The sun was actually shining brightly through the few clouds that scattered themselves within the blue sky. Along the side walk, trees that had been planted bloomed with bright pink flowers. Large potted plants sat in front of most of the stores on Main Street. They danced moved slowly back and forth in the soft breeze that was blowing through the town.

Castiel ran a hand through his dark hair, making it even more of a mess then it already was. He stepped into the library and shivered. He walked over to the science-fiction part on the shelves and scanned it to see if there was anything he thought would be worth reading. One caught his attention and he picked it up and read inside cover. He decided to get it. Castiel looked over the shelf one more time before noticing The Giver was back in it's place. He picked it up and added it to his other book.

One last time, he told himself, walking to get the books he held checked out.

Later that night, Castiel sat criss-cross on his bed reading through his favorite book again. He had almost made it through three chapters, reading every word like it was his first time. Before he read it again, he tried to forget what happened, trying to make everything a surprise to him once again. It was hard to do that, just forget everything, but sometimes if he didn't think about it, it worked. Coming to the end of the chapter, he noticed the writing.

'Though he had been reassured by the talk with his parents, he hadn't the slightest idea what Assignment the Elders would be selecting for his future,

or how he might feel about it when the day came.

Where have you been, you haven't been at the library all week. I hope everything is okay. Call me if you want. 555-2454

-Dean Winchester'

Cas read over the note several times.

He couldn't be writing a note to him now, could he? But who else in this town actually read this book? Who else did he know that would go and check the book out again when it was brought back?

He thought about calling him, or maybe just sending him a text, but he really did not know Dean. He had met him at the library a little over a week ago and now this guy was wondering if he was okay. Castiel kind of felt bad for making him think that something was seriously wrong. There kind of was something seriously wrong though, his mom was still no better than she was on that Saturday that Castiel met Dean.

He sucked in a breath and grabbed his phone. He entered his number into his contacts and then pulled up his messages. He rethought about actually texting him and almost convinced himself not to.

"Hello, it's Castiel. Uh, thanks for your concern, but everything is fine, I just haven't had time to make it to the library this week." He lied, he had plenty of time, he just didn't want to use it.

He sat his phone beside him on the bed and picked his book back up, flipping to the page after Dean's little note. Cas got in two paragraphs before his phone chimed. He picked it up, unlocking it and skimming over Dean's message.

"I see you've found my note. I'm glad every things ok though, but if you ever want to talk, I'm here. :)"

Cas smiled to himself, "okay, thanks."

"No problem Cas"

He locked his phone and sat it on his nightstand beside his bed before going down stairs to see if his brother was home. He walked into the living room to silence. He wasn't here.

Without a second thought, Castiel ran back upstairs and grabbed his book and phone, then went out the front door and across the street.

The grass in the field came just up past his ankles. Little flowers sat about an inch higher than the grass as they swayed in the slight breeze. Walking over the hill, Cas found a place to sit. He laid his phone beside him and leaned back into the grass and let it fall in around him.

The sun was setting behind him, bringing dark shadows over the meadow. Soon enough, darkness had filled the sky and the stars shined brightly in the black sky. He pointed out the constellations to himself as he laid there in the grass. The air turned from hot and humid to cool and calm around him as the minutes ticked by.

Castiel hadn't even pick up his book. He just laid there in the dark, looking to the sky and listening to the soft chirp of the crickets.

His phone buzzed beside him, pulling him from his thoughts.

"Hey Cas, I have a question." He read, holding the phone above him.

"What?" He typed, sending it quickly back.

"Why do you like The Giver so much?"

Castiel paused, laying his phone face down on his chest and looking back to the sky, thinking.

Why did he like that book so much?

He called Dean, putting the phone up to this ear.

"Where are you?" Castiel asked, not even saying 'hello.'

Dean hesitated before answering, "uh, home. Why?"

"You know where Adams Street is?" Cas quickly asked him.

"Yeah."

"Can you get here?"

"I guess, but if I get in trouble, I'm blaming you." Dean stifled a laugh into the phone.

"Okay, when you get here, there is a large field across from a blue house, number 1979. Meet me there?"

"Yeah, okay, see you in a bit." And with that, they hung up.

Castiel sat up in the darkness and waited.

"Can you get here?"

"I guess, but if I get in trouble, I'm blaming you." Dean stifled a laugh into the phone.

"Okay, when you get here, there is a large field across from a blue house, number 1979. Meet me there?"

"Yeah, okay, see you in a bit." And with that, they hung up.

Castiel sat up in the darkness and waited.