NB: I don't own sailor moon! Don't sue me!!
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BOUND
There was so much she wanted to know…so much she longed to know. The world around her beckoned for her presence. So many places to see, people to meet..her mind thirsted for knowledge, to know the universe and to seek meaning to the reason why it chose her as its ultimate leader. She longed for the stars, for the midnight sky to paint forth a blanket of explanations she knew she deserved.
8 years.
8 years and she continued to fight the battles day in and day out. The youmas, the evil, it became a part of her daily routine, to the point where she no longer knew where Sailor moon ended and the 21 year old woman began…
8 years.
8 years since she became bound to the matter of the universe. Since her birth right shone proud upon her forehead emanating the symbol of peace and…. serenity.
For that is what she encompassed within her very being, what she was made to represent and ultimately through all these daily battles, bring forth….serenity.
Yet what of the raging battle that remained in her soul? The raging battle that began the instant her life changed? What of the voices, the yearnings, which rose in her mind every time she looked at her 'normal' family and friends? The woman she now was, versus the woman she COULD have become had she not….
Yet she couldn't think of the million 'what if's now. Her mind, and her heart were not her own for she served every voice save the one voice that had been speaking to her for her entire life. A product of the society she was destined to rule, she could no longer make daily decisions without thinking of the repercussions on her destiny.
On their destiny
Even now, as she sat across the mirror, combing her long luscious silver blond locks, even now her own thread of fate was no longer her own…she was bound.
To him.
Bound in a way that she never would have believed possible. Bound not only in heart, but in mind and soul, and yet….and yet the burden of the universe that rested upon her delicate shoulders never seemed to take toll on his choices. Never. Whereas she sacrificed her adolescence, her individuality, her anonymity, he pursued it…he refused to remain bound by knowledge, even after he understood their past…her ultimate sacrifice of life. Even then…EVEN THEN he chose based on his own selfish desires.
He had succumbed to the evil
He had lost faith in their love
He had left her to pursue his dreams
While she pursued her destiny…
And yet…
And yet she took him back with open arms, embracing him with all that she knew, for this is what she had always known, what she had always understood. She understood the safety in his arms, the security she would receive from their union. She understood this fate was long drawn out for her before she was even conceived. How could she question it? Her life was laid out before her in black and white…where was the room for contemplation?
It was love…love that started this all….wasn't it? She always assumed it was love, never questioned its presence.
And now…
Now she found herself questioning everything.
Did love really exist?
Or was it a manifestation of the human mind driven by the fear of suffering through life's perils alone?
As the bristles of her paddle brush traced paths along her scalp separating the entwined threads of silver and gold, she began to wonder if her life had been the same way…a mesh of two fates equally possible, but so closely related that they did not seem separate at all.
What if….
A silent sigh broke her trail of thought, and the Queen of Crystal Tokyo placed the brush on the cherry oak dresser to stare deeply into the eyes of time herself. Dark hazel captivated her gaze. The soldier of time stared back at her queen with sad eyes full of understanding.
A small 'o' formed on the delicate royal's lips as she stared back in surprise.
"Setsuna…" She whispered barely audible, a name spoken with such deep sorrow that even the soldier of time herself closed her eyes in grief for the queen.
"My queen…" She bowed slowly to the royal, her skin paler than usual soaked with the knowledge of the inner battle the sovereign of the universe was fighting.
"I understand…I have always understood…I have only wanted your happiness…"
A small smile formed on Pluto's lips, one that radiated pity.
"It's odd, how I have been cursed with the ability to alter any soul's fate with the pluck of a few threads, and yet…your pure heart is one that has never existed…the only heart truly worth protection and for the sake of the universe…sacrifice's-"
Serenity silenced Pluto with the raise of her hand. With a small laugh, she turned her head away from the reflection of her guardian focusing her gaze out the window overlooking the palace gardens until it landed on a single rose covered with thorns.
"Sacrifice. I cannot say I enjoy that word Setsuna. Ney, it was never sacrifice that gave me this life. It was the requirement for equilibrium. Sustenance of the universe, an endless balance between darkness and light, good and evil. "
Her focus returned to the mirror, and Setsuna stepped back with the intensity of her gaze.
"That is the reason for my existence."
Small pearl tears formed at the corners of the sovereign's eyes, threatening to bring forth an ocean of suppressed emotions.
The two women continued to stare into the depths of one another through the mirror.
"Mommy!"
"Usako!"
With another heavy sigh, the queen closed her eyes to compose her mind and when she repened the sapphire orbs, she knew the guardian had returned to her place by the time gate. Standing in all her glory, the monarch whispered quietly to the air as she walked out the door…
'You and I are two of a kind my sweet senshi. Fate does not exist for us. We are simply…bound."