I had this idea for a while... It's going to be weird. Via is the main character. Yup... Well, enjoy...

Exclude me, why don't-cha?

That's right. My name is Olivia Dane and this is my minus 100 word recount on a four day situation. I felt excluded for like, only three days, however. So save your flower and get-well-soon card money and buy me a few pairs of shoes instead. Cool? Cool. On with the show.

-

So, I was born in this little British town, moved over to 'Sunny California' when I started year ten and now... Gah. I met this guy, right? Phil Diffy. As you do. I've actually done quite a good job of hiding my feelings. Phil Diffy. But when you do that it seems to build up. And then you get all huffy and nobody likes you. Phil Diffy. Well, the last part isn't exactly true... Maybe I should just start from the beginning... (Phil Diffy!)

-

So I'm walking around the town with my friend Keely and I casually dropped into a nice girly conversation...

"So, Keely... You like anyone?"

She looked at me like I was kidding. "No way! Like, a boy?"

"That would be the main subject, yes. Why, are you like... not 100 percent or something?"

I kept myself from laughing as I watched her reaction.

"No way! I am not... one of those things!"

I nodded. "Uh-huh. Sure. But really, don't you like anyone?"

She hesitated. "I kinda, sorta... likephil. Sorta."

I coughed. "Excusez-moi?"

"I like Phil." She whispered hastily.

Fuc-cacia!

-

That's just the start, my friend.

-

So I'm with Phil the next few days after...

"Phil, you like anyone?"

He glared at me. "What are you up to?"

God, his hair is gorgeous today. He's always yelling at Keely- I wish he'd yell at me. He's so cute when he's angry. The way his eyebrow goes all wonky. insert long, exasperated sigh here ...

"Via? Hello, earth to the girl in la-la land?"

I shook my head. "Huh? Oh, nothing."

He gave me a look. "Right."

"So, as I was saying... You like-like anyone?"

"Like-like? Like-like-love?"

I wanted to slap that smug grin right off his lips.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever. So, do ya?"

He shrugged. "You know I like Keely."

My mouth gaped as he went back to his equations.

"YOU LIKE-LIKE-LOVE KEELY?!" I screeched.

He shushed me, putting his hand over my mouth.

Mmm, physical contact... Oh, wait- It's gone.

"Yes!" He whispered. "But you can't tell her, okay?"

I swore many ugly Irish curse words in my head at that moment. Fuc-cacia wasn't one of em.

-

So there I was. Angry and upset and hungry (I hadn't eaten in hours), as well as pissed off.

But I figured if I wasn't going to get with Phil Diffy anytime soon, I'd put him out of his misery and get Keely with him. Oh yeah- You don't need to tell me twice, I know I rock.

-

"Hey, Vi, did you get this note?" One voice asked as I waited, leaning on a tree in the park.

"Meet me here at four eh?... It's four now. Via? Oh, did you get this too?" The other one asked.

I pulled the two like-like-lovebirds in towards me.

"Keely Teslow, you like Phil Diffy." I said simply. Her mouth hung open.

I turned to Phil. "Phil Diffy, you like Keely Teslow." His did the same.

"Now, you two have some crazy radar thing in your petty little brains that prevent you from sharing this fact, so I had to do it for you. Now. Talk, hug, do whatever you kids do. I'm gonna get some soda."

As I walked off, a small tear rolled down my cheek. But standing behind a tall handsome blonde at the snack shop...

I think I might be able to survive...