Chapter 1 – Cut

Sakura sat at the bench near the gates of Konoha, staring as if Sasuke would come through them. She sighed when she looked at the time, noticing she sat there for hours. 'I always do this, I always wait on him to come around and it is not as if he will ever feel anything for me aside from annoyance.' She thought to herself, standing she began to make her way home. The walk to her apartment was lonelier than ever, and she had never felt so abandoned.

I'm not a stranger

No I am yours

With crippled anger

And tears that still drip sore

A fragile frame aged

With misery

And when our eyes meet

I know you see

Sakura unlocked her door and shut it behind her, she stopped to remove her sandals before stepping into her kitchen to make dinner. She felt it every time they met one another's eyes whether it was a mission or even in conversation, she felt her heart pace increase and he would always insinuate it was a mere crush or infatuation. She knew how she felt though and nothing he would say could change that.

I do not want to be afraid

I do not want to die inside just to breathe in

I'm tired of feeling so numb

Relief exists I find it when

I am cut

I may seem crazy

Or painfully shy

And these scars wouldn't be so hidden

If you would just look me in the eye

I feel so alone here and cold here

Though I don't want to die

But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside

She lifted her gaze to the photo of team 7, her eyes lingering on Sasuke's face. She remembered the day the picture was taken, how happy she was to be next to Sasuke, he wanted to get it over with while Naruto posed in a funny pose and Kakashi just went with it. 'Like a family' she thought.

In time everyone moved on but her. Naruto married Hinata, Ino married Sai…..even Kakashi started dating Anko. Yet here she is, alone with no one. She lifted the bandage from her wrist to see faint scars, scars she left as a reminder of how far she has come from the time Sasuke left till now. She would cut to escape the pain of being his. She could never be happy with another yet she was tired of the pain she felt because of it.

She sighed before taking her cooked dinner into the living room. Countless times she felt it would be easier for everyone if she just faded out of existence and wiped herself from their memories. She shook her head when a knock came at her door, she set her plate down and stood. Making her way to the door she opened it, shocked to see Kakashi and Naruto. "Why are you guys here?" she asked, hiding her hands behind her back fluidly. She couldn't see him but she felt his chakra and it was a s familiar to her as her own was.

"We wanted to have a team 7 reunion Sakura. Just Naruto, myself, you and Sasuke. The four of us are going to Ichiraku like the old days, by the looks I would say you need the distraction from your thoughts Sakura." Kakashi said simply, Sakura's eyes narrowed when she saw his hands were not holding his infamous book, she knew he was planning something.

"Fine, but the minute you or Naruto have something that comes up I am out of the dinner plan, I have things to do, scrolls to study. Tsunade would not like me slacking in my studies to satisfy your low schemes Kakashi. I know how you are." His eyes widened before he regained composure, chuckling he waited till she locked up and they headed to the stand. Once seated, Sakura tried her hardest not to look in Sasuke's direction, which due to Kakashi's seating arrangements was difficult as he was right next to her.

They placed their orders and Kakashi watched Sasuke and Sakura from the corner of his eye, frowning when he witnessed a cool detached demeanor between the two. 'Tsunade has her work cut out if she expects a happy union between these two' he thought to himself and cursed when he saw the hawk in the sky. Sakura noticed but didn't say anything, Kakashi excused himself, the only thing keeping Sakura there was Naruto's presence.

"So Sakura….How's Granny Tsunade treating you in training? I hear she can be brutal" Naruto stated with a laugh, Sasuke's eyes widened before focusing on Sakura's face, he had sensed she was different, but he didn't know who or what made her as detached as she was. Sakura ate her ramen in silence for a few minutes before shifting her gaze to Naruto.

"Let us see how you handle having balls kicked in your direction at a high speed to make you increase your pace to dodge them. It isn't so much the physical training Naruto as it is the medical, I have yet to harness my precision to use medical ninjutsu as a tactic weapon in the midst of battle. It is complicated to get the right area at the precise angle when the opponent is not going to stand there and let you hit him." She said cooly, Sasuke snorted, there was no way Sakura had made it as far as he and Naruto did.

"Stop kidding yourself Sakura, you were always the weakest link in our team, face it…we would have been better off if you had gotten killed on a mission." Sasuke stated before starting in on his own food. Naruto glared at Sasuke and before he could do anything, Sakura flung Sasuke's ramen all over him before calling him a self-absorbed bastard and leaving the stand. Naruto shoved his bowl away and left money on the counter before taking off after Sakura only to find she was gone.

Kakashi's ears picked up running steps approaching Tsunade's office and quickly informed Tsunade that the conversation was at an end as they had company. Sakura burst through the door in tears, begging Tsunade to send her on a mission far away from Konoha. Tsunade's shocked eyes met Kakashi's and he had a feeling he knew the one responsible. "I will see to that task Lady Hokage" He said softly and turned to leave. Stopping at the door, he said something he knew would boost her self-confidence back up.

"Sakura, Listen to me as I will say this once and only once. Sasuke can only hurt you or make you feel inferior if you allow him that power over you. Show him he can't hurt you and he will stop. You are strong Sakura, a shinobi never shows their feelings, and I certainly would never allow Sasuke to see them." He said before shutting the door behind him on his way out. Tsunade watched the door for a few seconds, 'So he does see her as the daughter that was lost'

Sakura sat down and dried her eyes as Tsunade searched through her scrolls and settled on a medical training mission in Suna. "Gaara informed me that Temari can't keep up with the new medical units, there are simply too many people being injured and she has not the right amount of chakra to withstand so much training. If you want it, the mission is yours." Tsunade stated tossing the scroll at Sakura. "Sakura, make Sasuke regret ever thinking you weak, remember…. the blood of 2 sannin flow through your veins."

Sakura nodded and left, seeing Kakashi leaning against the wall outside her apartment, She shook her head and unlocked her door, letting him inside before shutting the door softly. "So, have you come to a decision Sakura?" he asked softly, listening while she fixed him up a batch of Ramen since he missed his dinner with them as she informed him of her mission and how it could take anywhere from a few months up to a few years. "If anyone can pull it off successfully, that would be you Sakura. You have come so far in a short time, even when you were a genin your chakra control was something to be marveled at and impressed with. Not many had that kind of control and I believe that is why Sasuke looks down on you. As great as his jutsu and strength are, his chakra control is nowhere near as perfect as yours is." After he finished his ramen, he stood and hugged her swiftly "Take care in Suna Sakura, if you need anyone or anything, message me and I will help you"

Sakura thanked him and after he left, she started packing. Once she rechecked everything and made sure, she suited up and locked the door behind her. She stopped at the entrance gate when she saw everyone but one. "HEY FOREHEAD!" Ino yelled, waving. Sakura smiled, even Ino came to see her off, everyone did except Sasuke, and for some reason that stung her. After she said her goodbyes Neji put something in her hand and whispered that she was to read it once she was in nodded in understanding and waved before taking off through the gates at a high speed run.

It took Sakura three long days of constant running, she refused to stop and rest because so far from either village meant she was open to an attack. She stopped outside the gates to Suna, the shinobi stopping her immediately. "No one enters without permission Miss." Sakura handed them the scroll and sighed in irritation when they said it could have been faked. Sakura silently released her chakra to summon a mini slug who slipped into the village to inform Gaara of her arrival.

Gaara's voice came from the wall within a few minutes. "Fools, she has permission, let her pass. You clearly saw the scroll with the Hokage's seal on it. See yourselves to Kankuro for reprimanding." He stated while he appeared beside Sakura on the ground level. "I apologize Sakura, things have been deceiving as of late. I am glad you are here to help, Temari has been increasing in exhaustion." Sakura followed him into the medical unit and gasped when she saw the entire room was filled with injured people and Temari was ready to pass out.

"Temari, go get some rest, I will oversee the rest of the injured." Sakura stated firmly, sighing in relief when Temari gave in and followed Gaara out of the room. She turned her attention to those who were injured and began working on the more seriously injured ones. Several hours later, Gaara walked in and was aurprised to see the large number of decreses of those still in the room. Sakura had started with the more seriously injured and wheedled her way through the line till there was very few left.