McUrkel

Summary: A funny Halloween one-shot about how Tony's costume infuriates McGee as the rest of the team gets ready for a costume contest that will take place in Season Four.

Rated T

Author's Notes # 1: I need to greatly thank Kinthinia, for beta-reading this for me, even though she was incredibly busy; plus, she picked the title too. You can find her through her many stories, including the two most recent- 'Every Now and Then' & 'Where Is The Line?'

I Do Not Own NCIS, it belongs to Donald Bellisario and Don McGill along with CBS and I'm only using them for the entertainment of this story.

McUrkel

Tony arrived at work wearing short khaki pants, suspenders along with white socks and sandals, carrying a large book. His brown hair parted down the middle along with thick, black-rimmed glasses. He was also wearing a short sleeved button down cotton shirt with black tie and a nametag that read McGeek. Tony exited the elevator and quietly sat at his desk, immediately pretending to read the book called How Nerds Can Talk to Girls.

"Uh, Tony, what are you going?" Ziva inquired, looking at him.

He completely ignored her, until she grabbed the book out of his hands. "Tony, what are you doing?"

"Well, Ziva, I am in costume, and I expect you to call me this for the remainder of the day." Tony said, pointing to his nametag. "Now, give me my book back.

"I am not calling you McGeek, so you'll have to live with me ignoring you all day," She said, tossing the book back, then folded her arms across her chest.

"Wow, what a great present, and it's not even my birthday or Christmas…thanks Ziva." Tony smiled then began 'reading' the book again.

"McGee, talk some sense into him." The brunette huffed then sat down at her desk.

"Tony, I find this very unprofessional and insensitive; therefore, I would request you to remove the offending attire," Tim pleaded.

"Sorry, McNerd, but the costume stays," DiNozzo replied, setting his feet on his desk with a big smile. "I'm entering the costume contest later and expect to win."

"This is a stupid costume, because I don't dress or look that way." McGee loudly stated, pointing to the man, then to his female co-worker, "right, Ziva?"

"Yes, McGee…you do not dress like a Nerf," She replied as Tony laughed.

"It's Nerd, not Nerf…although, McGoogle's head does resemble that foamy football."

"No it doesn't," Tim replied, "my head is average size."

"Touchy today, aren't we, Timmy?" DiNozzo snickered.

"I uh…be quiet." The youngest member mumbled, then quickly added when Tony stared at him, "Besides, I would never be caught wearing a pocket protector."

"If that's the truth, then how did I find this at your place…huh?" The senior agent chuckled.

"Stop lying, Tony…that's untrue."

"Well Probie One Kenobi, then explain how…" Tony's thoughts were interrupted by a beautiful blonde woman appearing wearing a long, light blue chiffon dress with matching gloves and a headband.

Tim watched Tony gawk at the poor woman, "Are you going to remove the offensive costume or not?"

"What a goddess." DiNozzo remarked, as she walked closer.

"Tony…" McGee was interrupted by Tony standing.

"Hi there little lady," he flirted.

"Tony…" Tim repeated but was still ignored as the man was still admiring the pretty woman.

"I'm Senior Field Agent Anthony DiNozzo…how can I assist you?" He asked, but was stunned to see that he knew the woman, "Abby? You look…wow."

"Thanks; what's going on here?" Abby asked, wearing a blonde wig and a black choker necklace.

"Well, they are being party-poopers…again." Tony informed her while pointing at his two co-workers.

"No…no." Abby stated in disbelief, shaking her head, "this is unacceptable…you both need to be in costumes, since its Halloween."

"What is the big deal anyways?" Ziva asked. "Why would anyone want to bob for pumpkins and carve apples…sounds like a big waste of time?"

"It's bob for apples and carve pumpkins." Tony corrected. "Although, I bet Jenna Jameson could easily bob for pumpkins."

All three uncomfortably stared at him, "What? Don't look at me that way, since we all know how well of a porn actress Ms. Jameson really is."

"Does your mind always have to refer to sex?" Ziva sarcastically inquired.

"Duh…I'm a red-blooded American man."

"Whatever." She sneered.

"Please, you guys, get in costumes for today…please." Abby wined as Ducky and Jimmy entered the room.

"Good morning, Cinderella." Dr. Mallard said, tipping his deerstalker hat.

"Good morning, Sherlock Holmes." Abby cheerfully replied back to the gentlemen as she curtsied. "Good morning, Dr. Watson."

"Good morning, Cinderella." Jimmy Palmer said with a big smile. "You look gorgeous…may I get a picture?"

"Of course!" Abby shrieked, posing by herself, then with Ducky. "Tim, will you take a photograph of us three?"

Jimmy handed him the camera, "Just press the red button."

"Don't worry, Palmer, McPolaroid knows how to use every gadget on the planet." Tony remarked, jumping in-between them, "Now say Candy corn."

"Candy corn!" All four sang in harmony as the photo was being taken.

"Okay…now one with me and Tony." Abby said, pulling him into a bear hug.

"I am not Tony today…I'm McGeek."

"I thought you were Revenge of the Nerds." Abby replied.

"Ahh, yes, Revenge of the Nerds…the 1984 comedy film staring Robert Carradine and Anthony Edwards…good movie for its decade and genre."

"Say Candy corn!" Jimmy excitedly said, the camera going off.

"Ziva, I have an extra pirate outfit that you could wear…I'll go get it." Abby stated, practically running to the elevator.

"No…I uh, do not dress up in silly costumes." She firmly stated.

"It's not a costume…it's from my personal wardrobe."

"Abby, why would you have a pirate outfit?" Tim asked, then quickly added, "You know what, I don't need to know."

Abby walked back over and leaned on Tony's desk, "I think one of us will finally win the best costume prize."

"Yeah, it'll be better than those jerks from accounting winning again." Tony remarked as Gibbs departed from the elevator.

Upon walking to his desk, Gibbs stood there, staring at the four members of his team in costume. "Doesn't anyone have anything to do…because I damn well know there was a missing Lance Corporal, who was just found dead in a vacant house… grab your gear! We're heading out."

"Boss, where's your moustache?" Tony inquired, very surprised to see the man had finally shaved. "I wished you would've left it for one more day since I already entered you in the Halloween contest as Wilford Brimley."

Gibbs stood in front of the smirking agent, "Obviously, I did it to ruin your plans." Jethro added his famous head-slap before walking to the elevator. "And put on a pair of long pants, because you look like Urkel." Gibbs took the elevator down while the others stood there and watched him.

"I can't believe he just said that." Tony stated, still dumbfounded.

"What did he say?" Ziva asked. "And what's an Urkel?"

"It's uh…" McGee started to say but couldn't find the correct words.

"I believe he just referenced pop-culture…definitely a first for the man who still calls every playback machine a Beta Recorder." DiNozzo remarked.

"I'm still confused…what's an Urkel?"

"Well Ziva, it's a very popular, yet bad invention from the '90's." Tony answered while they walked to the elevator. "There was even The Urkel Dance, so maybe that's where boss saw it...him."

"I kinda figured him for a Carlton Banks Dance man instead." Jimmy said, earning confusing glares from Ducky and Ziva. "It's a famous dance from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air…here let me show you." Jimmy enthusiastically started to do the dance and was eventually joined by Tony, Abby and Tim.

"What kind of prince dances like that and why is it incredibly popular," Ziva asked the doctor.

"Ducky shrugged his shoulders, "I have no clue…"

Later that night as the investigation concluded, the gang briefly stopped by the Halloween party to check on the results. Although many contestants put an incredible amount of talent, thought and money into their ideas, it was Tim McGee who had won.

McGee was dressed in a pink preppie polo shirt tucked into khaki pants with a brown leather belt. He did the Carlton Banks Dance to It's Not Unusual by Tom Jones and won the grand prize.

Setting his trophy on his desk, McGee couldn't help but smirk, "Sorry Tony, but thanks to you, I won."

"Yeah, yeah…stop rubbing it in." Tony bellowed. "It figures that I dress up as McGeek to win as a nerd, but the real McGeek wins by wearing his regular clothes to be a black guy dancing like a goofy white guy."

"What on earth does that mean?" Ziva asked, admiring the trophy.

"Well, it means that only a real nerd can win as a geek, not a fake one like me." Tony replied, "I guess I'm just too darn handsome and charming to be McGeek."

"Don't worry Tony, there's always next year." Abby happily reminded him. "I'll be Cinderella again and you can be my handsome prince…unless Gibbs wants to do it."

"So, Tony, next year you're going to be a Rotten Prince from Belir?"

"No…no!" DiNozzo growled, "It's The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air!"

"That's what I said."

"No Ziva…seriously you've never heard of it?" Tony questioned. "It ran on NBC with Will Smith and Alfonso Ribeiro."

She shrugged her shoulders as Ducky did the same.

"I'm stuck here with pop culture morons and my McGeek costume lost to a real McNerd." DiNozzo stated. "At least I get the last cupcake."

"No you don't." Gibbs replied, snatching it out of his hand, then added a quick head-slap. "Better luck next time, Urkel."

The End

Author's Notes # 2: "Steve Urkel" was a character from Family Matters and owned by William Bickley & Michael Warren, along with ABC & CBS. "Carlton Banks" was from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, which is owned by Andy & Susan Borowitz and NBC.

*** Thanks for reading as this was my first NCIS story and I hoped you enjoyed it! ***