I Honestly Love You
By: AndiKaneUnderwood
Sorry, not sorry.
Rachel walked down the hallway, semi-confident and hopeful.
Then, she turned a corner and noticed Finn and Quinn walking down the hall arm and arm.
Despair built up on her chest as she stopped and turned, watching as the "perfect couple" walked on, not even noticing any of the other people around, too wrapped up in each other.
Rachel's eyes filled with tears. She should've known she'd not be enough for Finn, not with a baby on the way and girl like Quinn carrying it.
She blinked back the tears and prepared to continue on her way, but then she noticed something.
Kurt had walked up the same hall that Rachel did and had seen the same sight Rachel had. He also stopped and his head dropped. Rachel couldn't see his face, but she guessed that it was the same crestfallen, hurting, desperate look that she saw in the mirror everyday when Finn rejected her again.
Rachel saw Kurt sigh, then he looked to the side, noticed Rachel and looked back.
Rachel offered him a sad smile and a wave.
Kurt's responding smile was sadder and his wave halfhearted at best. As he walked on down the hall, Rachel noticed something else.
The tears swimming in Kurt's eyes that he'd never let fall down his cheeks.
Glee~Glee~Glee
Kurt stepped into the faculty bathroom with a sigh and thanked God Mr. Shuester understood young love and the pains it brought.
He also thanked God that the Spanish teacher was outside standing guard because Kurt knew he'd never be able to explain or live it down if he was caught in there.
As he set down his bag and looked into the mirror, he felt the tears he'd been holding back flow over and the sobs bubble up in his throat.
They tore from his throat harsher and more powerful than anything he'd ever felt before.
Kurt looked down and ended up falling to his knees, doubled over at the waist and sobbed.
He cried harder than he had ever cried before. Even harder than the few days previous when he threw the high F to help his Dad and had to let go of a dream.
Kurt didn't notice the door opening and someone coming in, and even if he had, he wouldn't have cared.
He was too grieved and too pained to bother with the acrobatics of hoop-jumping for his teachers who didn't give a hot damn about him or anyone like him.
What he did notice was the arms that wrapped around him and held him close.
Kurt looked up, into the hazel green eyes of his teacher. Mr Shuester nodded and Kurt's tears began anew. He clutched the arms holding him like a life-line, like Mr. Shue was the only thing keeping him afloat in the vast sea of heartbreak. For now, Kurt guessed he was.
"It's alright, Kurt. It's gonna be okay." Mr. Shue murmured, gently patting the younger's arm.
"He's in love with someone else, she's carrying his baby, and he loves her and would never leave her or the baby high and dry, Mr. Shue. How is that okay? How will this ever be okay?" Kurt sobbed.
"Oh, Kurt," Mr. Shue sighed, "It'll get better. Just give it time."
Kurt looked up, his pale eyes gleaming with more tears. "I really love him, Mr. Shue. I honestly love him."
"I know." Mr. Shue pulled Kurt back into the hug and Kurt's crying only got harder.
"I wish you understood, Finn. I wish I could make you see. I wish you're love for her, could be directed at me. But, let's be honest, Finn. You've never once seen me. Because it's only been her. It'll only ever be Quinn."
Glee~Glee~Glee
Will handed Kurt another wet paper towel and Kurt sniffled as he took it and wiped the tear tracks from his cheeks.
"You're gonna be okay, Kurt." Will assured him, offering a smile.
Kurt smiled back weakly, "Thanks, Mr. Shue, but I don't think I'll be okay for a long time." With a quick nod and a sigh, Kurt picked up his bag and walked out of the bathroom.
Will had told Kurt to go home and rest, to not come to Glee today. Kurt had protested, but eventually his exhaustion won out and he agreed to calling his Dad to take him home.
Will knew that Kurt would eventually be alright, but he wished that his love could be worked out and reciprocated. Will sighed as he cleaned up the mess Kurt's breakdown had created.
Will would never blame Kurt for his feelings and he'd always be there for the boy if needs be.
He only hoped this wouldn't be a problem for Sectionals or Glee in general. Kurt was an amazing singer and Glee wouldn't make Regionals on Rachel and Finn alone.
Will sighed, Kurt's heart would likely be broken a million times over by Finn before this was all over.
Maybe it was for the best, maybe not, but Will would be there when the fire came down.
He hoped that when it was over, Kurt would be alright.
Glee~Glee~Glee
Kurt walked inside his bedroom and hoped his father would take the hint to leave him alone.
He may have made his peace with Rachel over their shared love of a certain football player, but that didn't mean it hurt any less.
He felt the lyrics bubble up in his heart, so he opened his mouth to give life to his song.
I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable, I'm not trying to make you anything at all, but this feeling doesn't come along everyday and you shouldn't blow the chance, when you've got the chance to say; I love you, I honestly love you
"I wish you could see how much I love you Finn. I honestly love you."