Helga ran her sleeve under her nose. Her skin felt moist. Of course, standing in the snow like this at night probably wasn't the healthiest thing she could be doing right now. But it also felt like the only thing she could be doing right now.
She couldn't go home. She was still too angry to face Bob. The ape-of-a-father had insulted her again and then made the mistake of comparing her once more to Olga- the perpetually perfect sister. It made Helga boil and wonder if her parents had ever really wanted her. Oh well. They were stuck with her now. But she was still too angry to see that beet-faced bully and bear those stupid accusations.
She couldn't go to Phoebe's. Well, technically that wasn't true, she probably could go to her place but every time she considered it, it put a sick feeling in Helga's stomach. These little spats with her parents had been happening more and more often these days. If she kept retreating to her best friend's house, she would become a burden. That is, if she weren't already. Even Helga could see how it weighed on her best friend's heart every time she showed up at her door with a duffle bag under her arm. Phoebe always dropped anything she was doing and let her in. The Heyerdahl parents would feed her if they hadn't eaten yet, and if they had, her mother would make a snack just in case Helga had run out before dinner. They were always very kind and never asked questions. Helga assumed Phoebe told them not to and they understood.
No, she couldn't go there again.
There wasn't really anyone else she felt she could go to and get the same kind of respect and privacy. Her classmates- she couldn't trust they could keep a secret. Soon, everyone would know how Helga had run away from home. How Helga was just a venerable marshmallow. How great Miss Pataki was such a loser she didn't even have a place to sleep. Her reputation and control she worked so desperately to preserve would be utterly shattered. And who else would understand?
If Helga had really thought about it long and hard enough she probably could have come up with at least one grown up in town who'd be willing to take her in without a word. But at the moment no one came to her weary mind. And she didn't really feel like breaking into any of her neighboring shops or schools so she could sleep indoors.
And in her present state there was really only once place in the world she wanted to be.
Helga wiped at her nose again. The warm glow from Arnold's boarding house windows poured out in tattered squares onto the chunky gray snow beneath.
Once or twice she saw a happy boarder pass a window, turn on or off a light, she could hear a shout, a giggle, or a groan. She watched the house from across the street like it was heaven's castle. Whatever was in there must be magical and perfect. More than anything, she wanted to go in and sit in the corner or behind a plant and listen to all those beautiful sounds up-close. She could imagine the swarm of animals they kept as pets, herd themselves from room to room dodging between the feet of nonchalant passers by. She could almost smell the slightly bitter aroma coming from the dinner remains of sticky green bean casserole and homemade apple cider.
The longer she stood there however, the darker and quieter the house became. Helga realized suddenly, she must have been standing in the same spot for hours watching the place with wonder and awe. Indeed, when she picked up her boots a little bit, her legs felt stiff and a small amount of snow had gathered on her expensive gloves and traveling bag that was still placed firmly under her arm.
This was silly. What time was it? It's not like she really had the bravery to go in there. She just wanted to be near it for a while. She wanted to be near to him for a while. Even as she knew it was time to find a place to stay the night, her feet didn't move- she didn't want to leave this place just yet… before all the lights were off. Only a few remained anyway. One that lead to the front kitchen, she knew, one that marked the study, and Arnold's bedroom roof-light; while having gathered a good amount of snow piled around it, was also glowing softly against the onyx sky smattered with white paint.
He must be still awake. Helga decided she'd wait until she saw his light go off before departing.
But Helga didn't get the chance. Just as she thought about checking to see if the synagogue had closed up yet, 'heaven's gate' opened. The light, warmth, smells, sounds she had been so keen to take in, poured out of the doorway onto the street made all the more bright by the appearance of her beloved- Arnold and his grandmother who stood right behind him. He was holding a garbage bag. This is didn't distract Helga to the magic of the moment in the least. She didn't even notice the bag he casually went to swing into the dumpster on the other side of the lawn was only half full.