Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist and I wish I did. Then it wouldn't have ended. XD

In the semi-darkness of its lair the hunter waited. Golden eyes watched with anticipation as the foolish creature ventured further into its domain.

This was the hunter's lair and his alone. A soft growl escaped into the air as the intruder continued along without a care in the world, not hearing the warning to turn back.

It was no matter; it was not the hunter's fault the creature had ignored his warning. The hunter tensed as it's soon to be prey wandered ever closer. Just a bit more and the prey would know why this was a place to be feared.

Closer…

Just a bit more…

…NOW!

The hunter lunged and caught his prey in his jaws. The creature bucked in terror and the hunter was almost thrown off. But with grim determination he hung on.

"WHAT THE HELL?"

The hunters blinked in surprise as the prey forcefully drug him out of his lair and into the light.

General Roy Mustang glared down at the small thing attached to his thing. Closer inspection proved it to be a small child with a mess of blond hair and golden eyes that was about four or five years old.

Roy sighed as he observed Fullmetal's small son attached to his leg. The boy had both arms and legs firmly wrapped around and seemed quite content to stay there.

As he watched the boy began to gnaw on his pants and growl fiercely all the while. Roy gave a startled yelp and tried to unsuccessfully remove him.

"No, bad Fullmetal spawn, bad!" he yelled as he hoped around his small office.

The noise, of course, attracted Hawkeye's attention and she quickly entered the office with her gun drawn and stared with bemusement at the scene before her. She lowly lowered her gun and a small smile crept up upon her face.

"Hawkeye help me!" Roy bellowed as he hoped awkwardly around the room.

Riza gave a sigh, put away her gun, and walked over to help Roy with his pintsized dilemma.

Ed laughed as he ate lunch with Mustang's remaining squad. Havoc, Fuery, and Breda had taken lunch with Ed and all four were soon swapping news and stories.

"So you're a dad huh? Man the years fly by don't they?" Havoc drawled as he drew a drag from his cigarette. "So where are the kids?"

"They're both with Winry. Last I saw she was talking with Maria Ross." Ed replied with a grin.

"Are you sure that's a good idea? Leaving both of them with her?" Breda said with a worried expression.

At Ed's confused look he explained. "Well you have a son right?" Ed gave a slow nod. "Then it stands to reason the kid would be exactly like you were."

"And that would be a problem how?" Ed replied with a fake sweet smile that happily suggested death and dismemberment in equal measures.

"Well…." Breda trailed off with a thank you to whatever god had answered his unspoken prayers as the conversation ended with the sound of an odd dragging noise approaching their table. The group turned and stared with confusion and varying degrees of amusement as their commanding officer slowly came closer.

Roy drew up to the table with a small grunt and lifted his leg so that it rested on the seat of the table.

"Fullmetal I believe you spawned this and therefore you deal with it." Roy slowly ground out as he gestured to the small boy still firmly attached to his leg.

Ed's face twitched and he lowered himself on the seat until he was eye level with his child.

"Theodore what are you doing?"

"Protecting my territory! He invaded it! It is mine!" Theodore replied with all the righteous indignation he could muster. This comment was further delivered with a glare at Mustang.

"Wait you were what?"

Roy gave an annoyed huff as he saw this was getting nowhere fast. "I sat down at my desk and you son attacked me without and warning. What he was doing under my desk I have no idea."

"IT'S NOT YOU'RE STUPID DESK IT'S MY LAIR! THIS STUPID GUY INVADED IT!" Theodore screamed with all the power his little lungs (no doubt inherited from Ed) could give him.

Ed gave a laugh at the angry sputtering noises coming from Mustang's direction and looked with amusement at his red faced offspring. "Now what have Mommy and I said about sharing with you're little sister?"

Theodore gave a sullen pout and grudgingly replied, "Not sharing is mean and selfish and if I don't do it then I get punished."

Ed nodded with approval. "Exactly. But that doesn't just apply to Trisha. It applies to everyone."

"Even the stupid head?"

By some minor miracle Ed managed to keep his face solemn as he replied. "Yes even the stupid he- I mean General Mustang. Understand?"

Theodore nodded and turned to the flabbergasted general. "Sorry for attacking you. And for biting you're leg.

Roy managed to stammer out a reply and he quickly dragged Fullmetal out of the child's hearing.

"Fullmetal what the hell was that? It is my desk to start with!"

"Well we are trying to teach good lessons to the kids. Think yourself lucky that I even involved you in my kid's lessons!" Ed gave an almost maniacal grin and clapped the stunned General on the back. Whistling Ed turned and walked quickly back to his kid before the men could retell too many of his adventures to Theo and give him ideas.

FIN.

A/N: Well hate it or like it? Let me know!