AAAANGST! Seriously.. it's Ran x Conan, but with lots of angst, and.. I feel like I killed someone.. maybe I did.. *grimace*

Anyway, it's my way of picturing of Conan (well, Shinichi anyway..) lost it, and is threatened, but all put into a one-shoot :)

Enjoy, maybe..

Junai no Seinen.

"Ran-neechan.." the voice was so low, barely registrable, but heard.

"What is it Conan-kun?" a young woman entered the room, seeing the pre-teen standing there, holding a sheet in his hand. She smiled, though it faded away when Conan didn't smile back, just handed her the sheet. She took it and read it.

"They want a counseling? Why?" she asked. Conan just stared at her. So she returned to the sheet of paper.

It had never been easy, nothing had. At least not for him.

Dark eyes, covered by the shadow of death.

"Social difficulties and.. personality disorder? You don't have those.." she said. Conan didn't answer on that, just walked over to the couch, not even looking at the man sitting in the chair by the desk, giving Ran a serious look, which she returned.

Long days, just watching from the window of the past, stuck.

Short hair, flawless once, but no more.

"Well, you have to go right?" the man said. Ran nodded.

"I guess I have to.." she murmured. Conan didn't look at her nor her father as he pulled out his homework, starting to write right away. Ran walked over, staring at what he was writing.

"What's your homework today?" she asked.

"Poem.." he answered, sounding lifeless and almost dead in a way.

It had been a long time since he had given up. Although, it still hurt.

Teen turned to child, only death was his companion.

Ran sighed and turned away, then got her jacket.

"I'll be back as soon as I can.." then she left. Conan slowly looked up, then glanced at the man, who returned to his television and beer. Those eyes, always older than the body, showing nothing anymore. One arm up, then another before a small needle was fire at the man, soon sending him into the realms of sleep. The boy, who once fought to return to his old self. Slowly he got of the couch and walked over to the door. The young boy exited, leaving nothing but his homework behind, a poem that would reveal the truth to those who had a clue.

And then, there was her, his love, or used to be. No more now.

Poison was his reason, his choice, his living, his death.

Feet moved down the stairs and into the street. The many people hiding him from watchful eyes. It wouldn't take him more than ten minutes to reach his destination. It was time. Heart thumping against the chest. Blue eyes, hidden behind glasses. Matted hair from the rain falling from the sky.

Sometimes, when he heard her cry for he who left, he cried too.

The dark cloaks of evil always following. He could never run.

Slowly, the house revealed itself. Cold, empty and huge. Once there was a teen living there, but he was long gone, having given his life to live on. Hands found the handle to the gate and the boy let himself in. Conan's feet moved slowly towards the house. His eyes shone with nothing but death. Though it was ironic. The one who had sworn to solve the crimes of death, now would be another one to succumb to kill with evil feelings.

It was hard letting it go, hard telling her that he would never return.

Drops of blood from the deep wound, the one sending him to the pit of hell.

The door creaked as it opened. Darkness welcomed him, letting him into it as soon as he closed the door. However, there was light in one room. He walked over, slowly, knowing what awaited him.

"I'm here.." his voice was soft, cold, and empty.

"Good." the other answered. Someone was lying on the floor. The soft, golden color dyed in red from a shallow wound. Eyes closed, hiding fear and grief. Conan's eyes never left the girl's face. Not peaceful, nor empty of emotion. Blood was no longer falling from the wound. But the floor was a pool now. There was no where to escape to, nowhere to run. He was caught, she was and there was only one way to escape, death.

So many times has she collapsed, waiting for him.

Crows, black as dried blood would always follow him, he knew that.

The gun was handed over carefully, but followed by a maniac grin. Blue eyes met that crazy face. Conan looked away, not daring to do anything else. There was the sound of sirens. But the boy did not fear. He followed them out, disappearing into the shadows with them, no longer knowing what else to do. The sirens was loud, screeching and filling his ears with pain, but with time, he would learn to subdue these painful sounds.

Even with him, they had waited in the large, empty house.

Soon, the barrel of the gun would point his way and he knew it was time.

As another one of the crows of death, he let himself get drawn into the black mass. No one could stop him now, no one could save him. It was his choice, his alone and he would never step down again. Not until his path appeared. Those who found the girls, would soon find him, but he was one with the shadows now. Finding him, would never happen, not while he was alive, nor after his death.

"Come here." the voice coed in his ears and he did just so. Pulled even further into the darkness of his long dead heart, he let his feet carry him to the one he once feared, and fled from, no more. The maniac grin appeared again.

"Flee." it was not a question, but an order. His mind was the mans to command and use. His body but a puppet used for crimes. When those close to his old self would realize, it would be too late. He was no longer the boy, or man they knew. He was nothing.

But he would no longer stay in the past, there was no need to.

As a puppet, he moved through the days of pain and suffering.

There was shouts, orders for a search. But the one who had done the crime was not to be found again. Safe in a car, driving away, holding the gun that took the life of a friend, and would take more. This was his calling now. Because as long as his love for the girl he would never see again remained, he would always go on, always live to see another day, but as a murderer. Ironically, it was this pure love, that moved his hand, moved his finger to the trigger when his friend watched him with fearful eyes, tears falling, her voice begging him not to do it, but he didn't listen. Silver hair moved slightly and those eyes caught his. Then a smirk. Fear, turned to pure passion for the sake of protecting the pure love he still held for the one he never would lay a hand on.

But, in a short time, it would all end. Death was on the doorstep.

His heart and soul was dead, all that remained was a body with it's scars.

"Welcome aboard.. Kudou Shinichi."

Geeeh XD Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaangst! ^^ always fun to write!

Junai no Seinen means 'The young persons pure love' well, I'll leave it up to you to figure out why I named it that ^-^

Review if you like.. or don't ;)