A/N: I now have three ongoing fanfictions including this one what am I doing with my life?

This is my first reader insert (besides the one I posted a long time ago but I deleted it because it was horrible.) so I really hope you enjoy it and if you do, please follow and/or favorite this fanfic. Reviews and requests are always welcome! (well, requests might close if this fanfic gets super popular but I doubt that will happen so yeah.)

One last thing! Trigger warning for this chapter!

Chapter summary: When you turned 15, you were diagnosed with extreme depression. You had it mostly because your dad always abused you, and you were bullied, but no one except you knew that. Whenever someone asked you why you were depressed, you always said it was just genetics because your mom had depression. It wasn't a complete lie; your mom did have depression, but that's not why you had it. You always felt like you were alone because you only had one friend, Natalya, and she was always trying to get her big brother, Ivan, to marry her. It was meant to be a prank, but Ivan took it seriously so Natalya kept doing it because she thought it was funny. One day, your depression gets so bad you try to commit suicide. Will you die? Or will someone save you before it's too late? {High school!human Belarus x Female!Depressed!Abused!Bullied!Reader AU}

You woke up on a beautiful Tuesday morning in May. You turned off your alarm clock, took a shower, brushed your teeth, changed your clothes, ate breakfast, and got on the bus. You sat next to Natalya while she talked to you about her newest plans to get Ivan to marry her, even though it was just a prank.

When you got to school, you put your backpack in your locker and got your science and social studies books because science and social studies were your first period class. (They are combined in one period.) You then headed to the classroom. Since you were early and the bell wouldn't ring for another fifteen minutes, you decided to get your science project that was due on Friday from off of the counter and work on it. You did that for ten minutes and then decided to work on something else. You put your science project back on the counter and went back to your seat. Then, Jake, a boy who was in your class with you, walked over to you and stared at you. He bullied you a lot, so you knew what was coming, but you decided to be nice to him anyways. You could never hold a grudge against someone. It was just something you couldn't do.

"Yes, Jake?" you ask politely as you stare up at him, even though you know he's going to bully you some more.

"Y/N, you should know by now why I'm here." he says.

"You're right, I do know. Go on. Bully me. I deserve it anyways... I'm such a bad person..." you murmured as you looked him dead in the eyes.

"Y/N, why do you even bother coming here to school every day when you know you're hated here?" he asks. You decide to answer honestly. Well, maybe not 100% honestly...

"Because education is important. I want to go to a good college when I graduate. I honestly don't care what people think about me." you responded. That was a lie. You DID care what people thought about you. A lot.

"Y/N, I get mad every time I see you because it reminds me of one thing and one thing only. The fact that you're alive. I hate that fact." he states.

"I understand. I feel exactly the same way about myself." you say as your stare at him.

After a lot of name calling later, the bell rings. Jake leaves and goes to his seat as the teacher taught the lesson for the day. But you couldn't concentrate. You tried your best to; you knew education was important. That was what you had just told Jake. But you found it impossible. Jake had been very mean to you today, and since you were very sensitive to people being mean to you, you were very sad. So you spent the rest of class poking at your eraser with your pencil.

~

You were in your last period of the day, choir. You always loved singing even though you personally thought you were horrible at it. Everyone always told you you weren't, but you didn't believe them. The teacher had just handed out a worksheet that you could either work on with a partner or by yourself. You chose to work on it by yourself because you only had one friend, and that was Natalya, and she wasn't in your choir class. However, Jake was in your choir class.

You were about halfway done with the worksheet when Jake walked up to you for the second time that day. You sighed and continued to work, hoping that if you ignored him he would go away. But that was not the case. He started talking to you. You heard him talking, but you weren't listening to what he was saying, until you heard him yell something about you being stupid and not responding. You looked up at him and sighed again.

"What were you saying, Jake?" you ask.

"I was saying that no one likes you, and no one ever will." he says with no emotion.

"That's not true. My friend Natalya likes me." you respond.

"How do you know she's not just pretending to like you, Y/N? How do you know?" you felt like your heart skipped a beat. You had never thought of that before. But he was probably right...

"Y/N, just kill yourself already."

You felt like your heart just shattered. Just then, the bell rang.

"M-maybe I will." you say.

"Good. Be sure to say in your suicide note that someone should tell me when your funeral is because I only want to see you dead." he says before he walked away to go to the bus.

Since you walked home after school and didn't ride the bus like in the morning, you ran as fast as you possibly could home. When you got there, you sat down at the kitchen table for a few minutes to catch your breath. You were just about to get up and walk over to the pill cabinet to end all of this pain when the front door opened and your dad walked inside.

Oh no. you thought as you tried to run upstairs to your room. But luck was not on your side and your dad grabbed you by your shirt collar just when you were about to sprint up the stairs.

You gasp as he throws you on the ground and begins beating you. He kicked your chest about 20 times before he began kicking your arm instead.

This was not a rare thing. Your dad always came home drunk and always did this, even when you didn't do anything.

You gasp as you choke back sobs. It hurt a LOT to breathe, so you were guessing he broke a rib or two.

He smacked your face and kicked you a lot more. After what felt like an eternity, he stopped, left the house, and drove away, but not before saying, "I swear, if you tell ANYONE about this, I will NOT hesitate to kill you."

Once you were sure he was gone, you laid there for about ten minutes and cried. Since he didn't hurt your legs at all, you were able to stand up and walk into the kitchen. When you got there, you took your pistol from its hiding spot and held it up to your head.

"I love you, Natalya." you say sadly. You were just about to pull the trigger when a familiar voice says, "Y-Y/N...?"

Natalya.

She must have gotten in through the front door. Your dad must have left it unlocked. You drop the gun, knowing it was over, and Natalya sprints over to you and starts crying. She then kisses your lips. It was you first kiss, and it was soft and sweet.

When you both pull away, Natalya hugs you. You sat in each others arms for what felt like seconds, but for all you guys knew, it could have been an eternity.