AN: Just an entertaining oneshot based on an idea I picked up from the wonderful world of Cheysuli-sama's Yaoi Bunny Farm.

Summary: It didn't matter how talented a shinobi Naruto was, how many demons he had sealed in him. He would never be strong enough for what he knew he was about to endure.

Rating: T, for death threats and hints of yaoi

Warning: this story contains mentions of Sasuke/Naruto and Yondaime/Kakashi. If you have something against relationships of mutual love and respect between two men, then go away and buy yourself an open mind.

Dominance Issues

Rationally, Kazama Naruto knew that he was a strong shinobi. Even if he had not had the bijuu Kyuubi sealed in him at birth, he was confident that he would still have been a strong shinobi. He came from a line of strong shinobi, ending with his father and himself, and his sensei was one of the legendary sannin, even if he was also a legendary 'Super-Pervert'.

At the age of seventeen, Naruto was confident enough in his skills to feel that he deserved his rank as an ANBU – he had mastered his father's Rasengan when he was thirteen and it had taken him less than a year to also master his infamous Hiraishin no jutsu. His status as a jinchuuriki and the power of the bijuu sealed within him only made him more powerful.

But Naruto was nonetheless terrified at that moment. Standing no more than two meters away from the entrance to the Uchiha compound, he could safely (for the moment) admit that he had never been more terrified in his entire life. Avoiding the gaze of the guards at the entrance (Uchiha Fugaku had heard that Hyuuga Hiashi had guards and thus organised his own) Naruto attempted to build up the necessary courage to cross the threshold towards his doom.

Anyone who could have heard Naruto's thoughts at that moment would have thought that he was overreacting more than a little to a situation that "really wasn't that bad". At least that was what Naruto's father had said to him earlier that day, in between muffled laughter. Kyuubi was no help, having retreated back into his cage to laugh in peace.

But really, for all his reassurances, Naruto's father had never, even as Hokage, had to undergo a process so terrible as the fearsome 'meeting the family'. Naruto's mother had walked out of her clan when she was fourteen, and she had then died in childbirth, before any hopes of reconciliation could lead to Arashi actually having to meet the much dreaded in-laws. His father's lover, Hatake Kakashi, was an orphan whose father had committed suicide a long time ago. So really his father did not know what he was talking about, and Kyuubi, being a psychotic demon, was in no position to make any comments regarding the state of the neuroses of the 'hairless apes'.

Furthermore, the mission Naruto was about to embark on was no ordinary mission, it would be almost as stressful and traumatising as throwing out his orange jumpsuit – even if it had been ripped and torn so much it was more patched than actual material, not to mention being stained with so much blood that it looked an ugly shade of dark brown rather than actually being orange.

He was not just meeting with the family of his lover, but the family was not just any family but the infamously psychopathic Uchiha clan. Naruto recognised that his judgement may have been biased considering his situation, but given his position, he considered himself to have a right to be more than a little worried about the danger he was about to embark into, a danger that not even being the son of the Hokage could protect him from.

But it really wasn't the entire Uchiha clan he was worried about Naruto thought as he touched one tremulous toe inside the entrance to the compound, trying to ignore the smirks of the smug guards, although the thought of a whole array of angry shinobi endowed with the Sharingan did bring a great deal of fear to him. No, it was only one member of the clan that really worried Naruto.

This thought was foremost in Naruto's mind when he came to the doorway of his lover's house. Ultimately, he thought as the door opened to reveal Uchiha Mikoto's gently smiling face, most of them weren't that bad really. As he passed through the gauntlet of corridors he passed by Uchiha Fugaku, obviously on his way to a meeting with his father's council, and the man nodded at Naruto, in a manner that was, for him, practically congenial.

Naruto had in fact almost reached the sanctuary of Sasuke-teme's room when the feared event occurred,

"Naruto-kun, would you speak with me quickly?"

Although the statement was shaped like a question, there was no doubt that it was truly an order, the kind that must under no circumstances be disobeyed. Not that he would have even thought of disobeying – even with Hiraishin to help him, there was nowhere to run.

In Naruto's opinion, he was perfectly justified in being absolutely terrified as he followed his lover's over-protective older brother through the halls of the Uchiha mansion. It was well known amongst the shinobi community about what had happened to Orochimaru. The snake pervert had made some perverted comment about Sasuke and had made the ultimate mistake of making the comment within Itachi's eerily advanced hearing distance.

Rumour was that they were still picking up bits of the S-classed missing-nin from all over the Hidden Countries, but there was limited evidence to substantiate that rumour. Naruto felt more justified than anyone else in his fear, mostly because he actually was sleeping with Sasuke and also because he had actually seen Itachi tear Orochimaru to shreds – with his bare hands.

As Itachi slid closed the door behind him, Naruto felt his stomach slide down into his sandals. He was just glad he had made his will before coming to the Uchiha compound. At Itachi's peremptory gesture, Naruto took a seat and quivered. After what seemed like an eternity to the terrified shinobi, Itachi spoke,

"What precisely, Naruto-kun, are your intentions towards my brother?"

The exaggerated enunciation made Naruto want to disappear, but he then remembered exactly who Itachi was talking about and managed to recover his courage to answer,

"I love him, does that satisfy you?"

Itachi frowned, or at least Naruto thought he did – trying to determine exactly what expression the older nin was using was the kind of challenge that took a great deal of experience to meet. Naruto had no intention of gaining that much insight into the ANBU captain's emotions. Eventually, Itachi spoke again,

"I suppose that that will have to do – for now. Just know one thing, if you hurt him, without his consent of course, then they will still be finding pieces of you when shinobi have been entirely forgotten."

Naruto was silent, torn between blushing an unattractive shade of crimson and turning an equally unattractive shade of terrified puce. Ultimately he decided that staying silent was the only way to stay intact – he was far too young to be castrated.

Before either person in the room could decide to say anything, the door slid open and Sasuke stepped in,

"Niisan have you seen…what are you doing in here, dobe?"

Just as Naruto was about to answer, he saw Itachi make the universal sign for 'say anything and I'll kill you' behind his brother's back. Deciding that discretion was in this case the better part of self-preservation as well as valour, he chose his words carefully,

"I was waiting for you and Itachi-san wanted to talk to me about the last mission we were on."

This comment was oddly appropriate, as the last mission the two ANBU had been on together had been the one when Orochimaru had met his all too untimely demise (untimely because the old pervert should have died years ago). Sasuke scowled, both at the reminder of his brother's manic over-protective streak and at the fact that while Naruto and Itachi were both ANBU, Sasuke himself had yet to be accepted. Deciding against questioning the determinedly terrified look on his lover's face, the younger Uchiha instead snapped,

"Well, come on, I agreed to go out for ramen, but now you're going to have to pay."

Rolling his eyes, Naruto rose to his feet, avoiding meeting Itachi's gaze. Sasuke then turned his attention to his brother,

"Aniki, I though you were training with Shisui-niisan today?"

Itachi scowled,

"I was going to, but he had to meet with his brats, I mean genin."

Sasuke smirked,

"One day you're going to get stuck with a team of brats as well, niisan."

Itachi shuddered, or at least Naruto thought that was what a slight shift in the shoulders signified amongst the Uchiha. Moving towards the door, he nodded in fearful farewell to the older Uchiha and followed the younger brother out of the compound. When they were safely seated at Ichiraku, Sasuke turned his best piercing glare on his lover (a glare he had probably learnt from his brother) and asked,

"What was that really all about?"

Shuddering in remembrance, Naruto turned to his bowl of miso ramen, extra-large for therapy purposes and answered,

"You really, really don't want to know."

owari