1+1=.I dunno!
Author: Nova-chan
E-mail: IlovemenoV@aol.com
Series: Slayers
Rating: G
Summary: Well, someone happens to think a lot of Gourry. Why, you ask? Well, this certain someone has decided to clone him so that they can take over the world because they believes that Gourry is the strongest being in the universe, because of.you have to read to understand my plot here!!! Anyway, are two Gourries too much for Lina-tachi? Find out!
"So," Gourry continued, "if you were to attack a villain, you would pick him up and throw him out the window. Like so." He demonstrated on a dummy.
The kids he was teaching "ooh"ed and "aah"ed at the sight. Gourry had been hired out by Lina to give the kids fighting lessons to pay for their last meal.
"Thanks kids!!" he called after them as he left the room. "And be careful crossing the street!!"
In the shadows, a sinister, evil, frightening, hairy person lurked. "Muahaha.lurk." She had watched Gourry effortlessly take out the "villain," and throw him out the window. She watched now as Gourry went over to Lina, Zelgadis, and Xelloss.
"Well, I earned twenty dollars teaching the kids how to fight," he said, happily.
"I made five cents selling balloon animals," Zelgadis grumbled.
"Well is it my fault that you can't make a balloon even look like a balloon?" Lina demanded. "I only made three dollars and fifty cents selling hot dogs. What about you, Xelloss?"
"I made one thousand dollars selling my body!" he exclaimed.
The group sweatdropped.
"Actually, I made thirty dollars by um.secret means."
Far away, an old woman who was just waking up shouted, "WHO STOLE MY PURSE??"
Lina sighed. "I don't want to know. Anyway, let's go to the inn for the night. There's no way I'm going anywhere after today."
The others agreed and they all went inside to settle down.
In the middle of the night, Gourry woke up and had a thought. (o.0)
"I left my sword in the gym!!" he exclaimed, running out of the hotel.
"Boy, it sure is dark in here," Gourry said to himself, walking through the gym where he had been teaching the children. "Now, where did I leave that sword?"
Suddenly, out of the darkness, something large hit Gourry on the head and he fell to the ground, unconscious. (Oh, no!! Not MORE brain damage!!)
A dark figure stepped forward and chuckled. "Unquestionably muahaha."
Gourry woke up and yawned. "Wow!! What a dream!" He was about to get up and get breakfast when he realized that he couldn't move. "Huh?" He looked to see that his wrists were strapped to the metal board he was lying on. "That's strange. I don't remember doing this before I went to bed."
"That is because, __I__, muahaha'd you!!" someone exclaimed, from the shadows.
"You muahaha'd me?" Gourry asked.
"Yes. I did." The figure stepped forward.
"Hey! Don't I know you?" the blonde swordsman asked.
"Why, of course you know me. I am Little Washu, the genius!!" the pink- haired girl shouted, causing a disturbing amount of confetti to fly around the room.
"So, what can I do for you?" Gourry asked.
"Oh, you can help me take over the world, my dear Gourry!" she shouted.
"Oh.oh-kay!"
"Now, I'll let you out of those manacles if you'll do one teensy weensy itty bitty tiny little thing for me!!" Washu exclaimed.
"What?"
"Call me Little Washu!!!!"
"Oh-kay, Little Washu," he said, confused.
Washu pressed a button on her remote and Gourry was set free. "Well," he said, "if that's all, I'll just be going."
"Oh, no!!" she interrupted. "You've still gotta help me."
"You want me to call you Little Washu again?"
"No.I mean yes.I mean.waitaminute!! Listen, I DO want you to call me Little Washu, but I also want you to do something else for me," she explained.
"Oh-kay.what'd you say again?" Gourry wondered.
Washu fell over. "Call me Chibi Washu!!"
"I thought you wanted me to call you Little Washu."
"I do! It's the same thing!"
"Oh-kay, now you're confusing me."
Washu sighed. "Listen: call me Little Washu OR Chibi Washu. Do you have that much?"
"Um.yes."
"Oh-kay. Now, let me tell you the other thing I want you to do."
"Oh-kay. I'm ready."
"I want to run some experiments on you," she said, smiling. "You have good potential. I think that together, you and I can take over the world."
"Oh-kay! Sounds like fun!" Gourry smiled. "Now, what is it that you wanted me to call you again?"
"A-are you sure this is safe, Little Washu?" Gourry asked, as he was looking down the lens of a laser pointed straight at him.
"Of course it's safe!!" Washu exclaimed, adjusting her goggles, ready to do the procedure. "Hang on tight!!" She engaged the button.
"AAAAAAAAA!!" Gourry screamed.
"Gourry, I didn't do anything yet," she said, sweatdropping.
"Oh.I knew that.I was just.uh.practicing."
"Hmm." She looked at him, questioningly. "Maybe I should replace the brain with some other substance. Like jello."
"Jello? WHERE???" Gourry exclaimed.
Chapter 2!!
"Hold still, Gourry," Washu said. "This'll only take a second."
"What'll only take a second?"
**ZAP!!**
"AAAAHH!!!"
"All done!" Washu smiled, eccentrically and grabbed a readout. "Well.there should be another one of you somewhere," she said, scratching her head. "But, I forgot where it was supposed to end up."
In another part of town, (Which, I'm not saying that Washu was in the town, but she.um.anyway,) a lone figure arose. A new creation, a new life had been born. What kind of creature was this? Was he a good person, or a sinister, evil one?
"I smell chicken!!!" he screamed, running in the direction of the smell.
In yet another part of town, Lina was feasting on none other than chicken! Zelgadis was calmly sipping his coffee Xelloss wasn't too far away.
Suddenly, Gourry (or someone who looked LIKE little Goo-chan) ran in.
"Chicken!!" he cried.
"Get your own, Gourry!" Lina yelled.
"Mmm.chicken!!" He hailed a waitress. "I want ten of whatever she's having!" he said, gesturing toward Lina.
"But.um.sir.she's having three of everything." the waitress stammered.
"Oh, in that case, could you triple my original order?" the Gourry clone wondered.
"Um.so let me get this straight: you want 90 of everything?"
"Yeah!!"
"Oh-kay, if you say so." The disturbed waitress went into the kitchen.
"So, Gourry, where have you been?" Lina wondered.
The Gourry clone looked at Zelgadis, expecting him to answer.
"Hello!!" Lina yelled, waving her hand in front of Gourry clone's face. "Wake up, Gourry! I was talking to you!"
"Huh? I thought he was Gourry," he said, pointing to Zelgadis.
"Oh, come on," Lina said, shaking her head, "I know you're not that stupid.are you?"
"Um."
"Never mind."
Elsewhere, where Gourry and Washu were still trying to figure out where Gourry-clone (whom I shall now call Goo-clone to keep my sanity) had ended up.
"I can't figure it out!" Washu exclaimed. "He should've at least come out somewhere in the room!"
"Maybe he ended up in a small town where he met up with Lina and Zelgadis who now confuse him for me," Gourry suggested.
"Oh, please, Gourry!" Washu sighed. "Like that would ever happen."
"Wow!! Food!!" Goo-clone shrieked, delightedly at the actual truckloads of food that was being brought out. "Yum!!" He began eating for all he was worth.
"Hello all!" Xelloss exclaimed, appearing from no where in particular. "Hello Goo-clone!"
"Goo-clone?" Lina wondered.
Goo-clone looked at the Mazoku. "Hi complete and total stranger that I have never seen in my life which isn't too far-fetched since I've only been alive for five minutes!"
".hi Goo-clone!" Xelloss repeated.
Goo-clone smiled and continued eating.
"Why are you calling him Goo-clone?" Zelgadis asked. "And why is he acting like he was hit my more than one trucks today?"
"Sore wa himitsu desu!" and he disappeared.
"So much for that," Lina muttered.
Once again, elsewhere, the author was seen sitting at her computer, typing in things about Goo-clone and Xelloss and thinking about chocolate pudding. She looked at the scene, then blasted the camera behind her.
Else-elsewhere, Washu began searching all over her lab. She went out of it completely and started searching the Masaki house.
She passed by Ryoko, Aeka, and Tenchi.
"Lord Tenchi!! Miss Ryoko is looking at me!!" Aeka whined.
"Tenchi! Aeka is being a brat!!" Ryoko cried.
"I feel like a mother," Tenchi said to himself.
"I've got to find Goo-clone!!" Washu exclaimed.
"Little Washu? Lil Washu??" Gourry wondered. "Ooh.what does this button do?"
Camera goes to outside of Masaki house, which blows up. Gourry is blown to the town Lina, Zelgadis, and Goo-clone are.
"Owwie." Gourry looked around when his head stopped spinning. "I smell chicken!!!"
Chapter 3!!!!
Quote of the chapter:
Nova-chan: Expect the unexpected. It's good advice. But if you expect the unexpected, it's no longer unexpected.
Rachael: Stop making me think!!
Goo-clone looked at Zelgadis, who was drinking coffee.
"Hey," he said, "did you know that for the price of that cup of coffee, you could feed a third world country the size of Australia for a year?"
"Yes," Zelgadis answered, taking another sip.
"Oh, oh-kay. Just wondering." Goo-clone shrugged.
"Lina!!" someone shouted from the front of the store.
Lina looked up to see **gasp!!** Gourry?? "Nani??" she shrieked.
"Hi Lina!! Hi Zelgadis! Hi me-clone!" Gourry exclaimed.
"Who are you?" Goo-clone wondered. "And why do you look like me?"
"You're my clone. You were made from my DNA," Gourry answered.
".Gourry, how could you possibly know a thing like that?" Zelgadis asked flatly.
"Little Washu told me," he answered.
"And you remembered?"
".yes."
"Whatever."
"So, little Goo-clone," Gourry said, sweetly, "whaddaya wanna do?"
Goo-clone thought for a minute. "Take over the world!!" he shouted, disturbing one or two people sitting around him.
"Oh-kay, but can we eat first?" Gourry wondered, his stomach rumbling.
"Oh-kay."
"Waitress!!" the original swordsman beckoned.
"Yes?" she answered.
"I'll have three of whatever he had," he said, pointing at Goo-clone.
"So, you're saying you want 270 orders of everything?"
".um.yes."
"If you say so, sir."
"Wow!! Food! I like food," Gourry said, smiling brightly.
Washu sat up, a little crispy, but still quite alive. She picked up some papers scattered close to her and read the one on top. "Uh oh."
This time when the food was delivered, it was by a teleportation device. (There's no way they could possibly get it all without one!)
Gourry's eyes widened. "Food." he said, simply.
"Yum!!" Goo-clone shrieked, devouring all the food in one big gulp.
Gourry's eyes filled up with tears. "Food? Food why have you deserted me??" he wondered, sadly.
"Oh.I don't feel so good." Goo-clone mumbled, his vision reeling.
"That's probably a side effect of eating 270 orders of fish sticks, cheese sticks, and celery sticks," Zelgadis said, sipping another cup of coffee.
"Oh."
"Poor lil Goo-clone," Gourry said, sympathetically.
Goo-clone's face turned red, then green, like he was sick, which he was.
"Lil Goo-clone?" Gourry said, softly
The door burst open. "Everybody down!!" Washu ordered. "That clone's about to-"
BOOM!!
"Blow up." she finished, then fell over.
Lina, Zelgadis, Gourry, and the other customers were covered in clone- remnants.
"Eww." someone whispered.
"Goo-clone?" Gourry said, sadly. "Mmm!! Chicken!!" He began eating a clone- spew-covered leg of chicken. "It's crispy."
-That one ended pretty weird, but I like it pretty well, anyway. So, look for my next fic which is **THE ONE THAT CAME TO ME IN A DREAM** I'm still taking ideas for fanfics because I need inspiration a lot lately!! Any ideas are accepted!! Just look at this one: it was all Guyler-chan's idea! So, send me a review and an idea!! Thankies Guyler!!
BTW-I have this question. If anyone can answer it, then you're my hero. Oh- kay, here it is. If Xelloss likes pain, receiving and causing it, then pain=happiness. With me on that? Oh-kay then, if Xelloss hates people being all touchy-feely and nice and lovey-dovey, then love=pain. Got that so far? So, in a sense he'd want to avoid love and instead go for pain, right? Then, if he wanted pain, he'd want to feel love because love hurts him and he likes pain, right? So, why not try to love someone and be loved so he can experience pain, which is what he wants? Since pain=happiness and love=pain, then why wouldn't love=happiness? He should want to have love so that he could be hurt, because pain=happiness, right?? HELP ME!!
-Nova-chan
Author: Nova-chan
E-mail: IlovemenoV@aol.com
Series: Slayers
Rating: G
Summary: Well, someone happens to think a lot of Gourry. Why, you ask? Well, this certain someone has decided to clone him so that they can take over the world because they believes that Gourry is the strongest being in the universe, because of.you have to read to understand my plot here!!! Anyway, are two Gourries too much for Lina-tachi? Find out!
"So," Gourry continued, "if you were to attack a villain, you would pick him up and throw him out the window. Like so." He demonstrated on a dummy.
The kids he was teaching "ooh"ed and "aah"ed at the sight. Gourry had been hired out by Lina to give the kids fighting lessons to pay for their last meal.
"Thanks kids!!" he called after them as he left the room. "And be careful crossing the street!!"
In the shadows, a sinister, evil, frightening, hairy person lurked. "Muahaha.lurk." She had watched Gourry effortlessly take out the "villain," and throw him out the window. She watched now as Gourry went over to Lina, Zelgadis, and Xelloss.
"Well, I earned twenty dollars teaching the kids how to fight," he said, happily.
"I made five cents selling balloon animals," Zelgadis grumbled.
"Well is it my fault that you can't make a balloon even look like a balloon?" Lina demanded. "I only made three dollars and fifty cents selling hot dogs. What about you, Xelloss?"
"I made one thousand dollars selling my body!" he exclaimed.
The group sweatdropped.
"Actually, I made thirty dollars by um.secret means."
Far away, an old woman who was just waking up shouted, "WHO STOLE MY PURSE??"
Lina sighed. "I don't want to know. Anyway, let's go to the inn for the night. There's no way I'm going anywhere after today."
The others agreed and they all went inside to settle down.
In the middle of the night, Gourry woke up and had a thought. (o.0)
"I left my sword in the gym!!" he exclaimed, running out of the hotel.
"Boy, it sure is dark in here," Gourry said to himself, walking through the gym where he had been teaching the children. "Now, where did I leave that sword?"
Suddenly, out of the darkness, something large hit Gourry on the head and he fell to the ground, unconscious. (Oh, no!! Not MORE brain damage!!)
A dark figure stepped forward and chuckled. "Unquestionably muahaha."
Gourry woke up and yawned. "Wow!! What a dream!" He was about to get up and get breakfast when he realized that he couldn't move. "Huh?" He looked to see that his wrists were strapped to the metal board he was lying on. "That's strange. I don't remember doing this before I went to bed."
"That is because, __I__, muahaha'd you!!" someone exclaimed, from the shadows.
"You muahaha'd me?" Gourry asked.
"Yes. I did." The figure stepped forward.
"Hey! Don't I know you?" the blonde swordsman asked.
"Why, of course you know me. I am Little Washu, the genius!!" the pink- haired girl shouted, causing a disturbing amount of confetti to fly around the room.
"So, what can I do for you?" Gourry asked.
"Oh, you can help me take over the world, my dear Gourry!" she shouted.
"Oh.oh-kay!"
"Now, I'll let you out of those manacles if you'll do one teensy weensy itty bitty tiny little thing for me!!" Washu exclaimed.
"What?"
"Call me Little Washu!!!!"
"Oh-kay, Little Washu," he said, confused.
Washu pressed a button on her remote and Gourry was set free. "Well," he said, "if that's all, I'll just be going."
"Oh, no!!" she interrupted. "You've still gotta help me."
"You want me to call you Little Washu again?"
"No.I mean yes.I mean.waitaminute!! Listen, I DO want you to call me Little Washu, but I also want you to do something else for me," she explained.
"Oh-kay.what'd you say again?" Gourry wondered.
Washu fell over. "Call me Chibi Washu!!"
"I thought you wanted me to call you Little Washu."
"I do! It's the same thing!"
"Oh-kay, now you're confusing me."
Washu sighed. "Listen: call me Little Washu OR Chibi Washu. Do you have that much?"
"Um.yes."
"Oh-kay. Now, let me tell you the other thing I want you to do."
"Oh-kay. I'm ready."
"I want to run some experiments on you," she said, smiling. "You have good potential. I think that together, you and I can take over the world."
"Oh-kay! Sounds like fun!" Gourry smiled. "Now, what is it that you wanted me to call you again?"
"A-are you sure this is safe, Little Washu?" Gourry asked, as he was looking down the lens of a laser pointed straight at him.
"Of course it's safe!!" Washu exclaimed, adjusting her goggles, ready to do the procedure. "Hang on tight!!" She engaged the button.
"AAAAAAAAA!!" Gourry screamed.
"Gourry, I didn't do anything yet," she said, sweatdropping.
"Oh.I knew that.I was just.uh.practicing."
"Hmm." She looked at him, questioningly. "Maybe I should replace the brain with some other substance. Like jello."
"Jello? WHERE???" Gourry exclaimed.
Chapter 2!!
"Hold still, Gourry," Washu said. "This'll only take a second."
"What'll only take a second?"
**ZAP!!**
"AAAAHH!!!"
"All done!" Washu smiled, eccentrically and grabbed a readout. "Well.there should be another one of you somewhere," she said, scratching her head. "But, I forgot where it was supposed to end up."
In another part of town, (Which, I'm not saying that Washu was in the town, but she.um.anyway,) a lone figure arose. A new creation, a new life had been born. What kind of creature was this? Was he a good person, or a sinister, evil one?
"I smell chicken!!!" he screamed, running in the direction of the smell.
In yet another part of town, Lina was feasting on none other than chicken! Zelgadis was calmly sipping his coffee Xelloss wasn't too far away.
Suddenly, Gourry (or someone who looked LIKE little Goo-chan) ran in.
"Chicken!!" he cried.
"Get your own, Gourry!" Lina yelled.
"Mmm.chicken!!" He hailed a waitress. "I want ten of whatever she's having!" he said, gesturing toward Lina.
"But.um.sir.she's having three of everything." the waitress stammered.
"Oh, in that case, could you triple my original order?" the Gourry clone wondered.
"Um.so let me get this straight: you want 90 of everything?"
"Yeah!!"
"Oh-kay, if you say so." The disturbed waitress went into the kitchen.
"So, Gourry, where have you been?" Lina wondered.
The Gourry clone looked at Zelgadis, expecting him to answer.
"Hello!!" Lina yelled, waving her hand in front of Gourry clone's face. "Wake up, Gourry! I was talking to you!"
"Huh? I thought he was Gourry," he said, pointing to Zelgadis.
"Oh, come on," Lina said, shaking her head, "I know you're not that stupid.are you?"
"Um."
"Never mind."
Elsewhere, where Gourry and Washu were still trying to figure out where Gourry-clone (whom I shall now call Goo-clone to keep my sanity) had ended up.
"I can't figure it out!" Washu exclaimed. "He should've at least come out somewhere in the room!"
"Maybe he ended up in a small town where he met up with Lina and Zelgadis who now confuse him for me," Gourry suggested.
"Oh, please, Gourry!" Washu sighed. "Like that would ever happen."
"Wow!! Food!!" Goo-clone shrieked, delightedly at the actual truckloads of food that was being brought out. "Yum!!" He began eating for all he was worth.
"Hello all!" Xelloss exclaimed, appearing from no where in particular. "Hello Goo-clone!"
"Goo-clone?" Lina wondered.
Goo-clone looked at the Mazoku. "Hi complete and total stranger that I have never seen in my life which isn't too far-fetched since I've only been alive for five minutes!"
".hi Goo-clone!" Xelloss repeated.
Goo-clone smiled and continued eating.
"Why are you calling him Goo-clone?" Zelgadis asked. "And why is he acting like he was hit my more than one trucks today?"
"Sore wa himitsu desu!" and he disappeared.
"So much for that," Lina muttered.
Once again, elsewhere, the author was seen sitting at her computer, typing in things about Goo-clone and Xelloss and thinking about chocolate pudding. She looked at the scene, then blasted the camera behind her.
Else-elsewhere, Washu began searching all over her lab. She went out of it completely and started searching the Masaki house.
She passed by Ryoko, Aeka, and Tenchi.
"Lord Tenchi!! Miss Ryoko is looking at me!!" Aeka whined.
"Tenchi! Aeka is being a brat!!" Ryoko cried.
"I feel like a mother," Tenchi said to himself.
"I've got to find Goo-clone!!" Washu exclaimed.
"Little Washu? Lil Washu??" Gourry wondered. "Ooh.what does this button do?"
Camera goes to outside of Masaki house, which blows up. Gourry is blown to the town Lina, Zelgadis, and Goo-clone are.
"Owwie." Gourry looked around when his head stopped spinning. "I smell chicken!!!"
Chapter 3!!!!
Quote of the chapter:
Nova-chan: Expect the unexpected. It's good advice. But if you expect the unexpected, it's no longer unexpected.
Rachael: Stop making me think!!
Goo-clone looked at Zelgadis, who was drinking coffee.
"Hey," he said, "did you know that for the price of that cup of coffee, you could feed a third world country the size of Australia for a year?"
"Yes," Zelgadis answered, taking another sip.
"Oh, oh-kay. Just wondering." Goo-clone shrugged.
"Lina!!" someone shouted from the front of the store.
Lina looked up to see **gasp!!** Gourry?? "Nani??" she shrieked.
"Hi Lina!! Hi Zelgadis! Hi me-clone!" Gourry exclaimed.
"Who are you?" Goo-clone wondered. "And why do you look like me?"
"You're my clone. You were made from my DNA," Gourry answered.
".Gourry, how could you possibly know a thing like that?" Zelgadis asked flatly.
"Little Washu told me," he answered.
"And you remembered?"
".yes."
"Whatever."
"So, little Goo-clone," Gourry said, sweetly, "whaddaya wanna do?"
Goo-clone thought for a minute. "Take over the world!!" he shouted, disturbing one or two people sitting around him.
"Oh-kay, but can we eat first?" Gourry wondered, his stomach rumbling.
"Oh-kay."
"Waitress!!" the original swordsman beckoned.
"Yes?" she answered.
"I'll have three of whatever he had," he said, pointing at Goo-clone.
"So, you're saying you want 270 orders of everything?"
".um.yes."
"If you say so, sir."
"Wow!! Food! I like food," Gourry said, smiling brightly.
Washu sat up, a little crispy, but still quite alive. She picked up some papers scattered close to her and read the one on top. "Uh oh."
This time when the food was delivered, it was by a teleportation device. (There's no way they could possibly get it all without one!)
Gourry's eyes widened. "Food." he said, simply.
"Yum!!" Goo-clone shrieked, devouring all the food in one big gulp.
Gourry's eyes filled up with tears. "Food? Food why have you deserted me??" he wondered, sadly.
"Oh.I don't feel so good." Goo-clone mumbled, his vision reeling.
"That's probably a side effect of eating 270 orders of fish sticks, cheese sticks, and celery sticks," Zelgadis said, sipping another cup of coffee.
"Oh."
"Poor lil Goo-clone," Gourry said, sympathetically.
Goo-clone's face turned red, then green, like he was sick, which he was.
"Lil Goo-clone?" Gourry said, softly
The door burst open. "Everybody down!!" Washu ordered. "That clone's about to-"
BOOM!!
"Blow up." she finished, then fell over.
Lina, Zelgadis, Gourry, and the other customers were covered in clone- remnants.
"Eww." someone whispered.
"Goo-clone?" Gourry said, sadly. "Mmm!! Chicken!!" He began eating a clone- spew-covered leg of chicken. "It's crispy."
-That one ended pretty weird, but I like it pretty well, anyway. So, look for my next fic which is **THE ONE THAT CAME TO ME IN A DREAM** I'm still taking ideas for fanfics because I need inspiration a lot lately!! Any ideas are accepted!! Just look at this one: it was all Guyler-chan's idea! So, send me a review and an idea!! Thankies Guyler!!
BTW-I have this question. If anyone can answer it, then you're my hero. Oh- kay, here it is. If Xelloss likes pain, receiving and causing it, then pain=happiness. With me on that? Oh-kay then, if Xelloss hates people being all touchy-feely and nice and lovey-dovey, then love=pain. Got that so far? So, in a sense he'd want to avoid love and instead go for pain, right? Then, if he wanted pain, he'd want to feel love because love hurts him and he likes pain, right? So, why not try to love someone and be loved so he can experience pain, which is what he wants? Since pain=happiness and love=pain, then why wouldn't love=happiness? He should want to have love so that he could be hurt, because pain=happiness, right?? HELP ME!!
-Nova-chan