Transmission Detected: TRUE
VI Translation: ACTIVE
Transcription: ACTIVE
Recording transcription as follows:
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UNKNOWN INSTRUMENTS
Give me a kiss to build a dream on and my imagination will drive upon that kiss_ _ _
Hmmn sweetheart I ask but only this a kiss to build a dream on~_ _ _
Give me a kiss before you leave me and my imagination will feed my hungry heart_ _ _
Leave me one thing before we part a kiss to build a dream on_ _ _
When I'm alone with my advances I'll be with you
Even romances, I can believe they're true
Give me your lips for just a moment zxzdsfasvfvagbnt
. . .
. . . Please wait, calculating.
. . .
. . . Please wait, calculating.
. . .
. . . Please wait, calculating.
Reconnection: FAILED
Failed to find signal, signal declared: LOST
Signal in frequency bands for: 'pre-space flight radio transmissions'
DETAILED: . . .
Mix of Amplitude and Frequency Modulation, previously unknown, sample sent to STG servers.
. . .
Source determined: Mass Relays, Unintentional transmission.
. . .
. . .
. . .
Salarian Union Relay Sleeper Module, Course of action determined: Alerting 'Citadel Council' of possible 'Type Charlie' Civilisation beyond relay designate '314'
. . .
WARNING: TURIAN SCOUT SHIP DETECTED
DETAILS: Ship is an older model, no longer in service, preferred by explorers and black market merchants for their small ping rating and outstanding speed and manoeuvrability.
- VI has determined vessel is not authority owned.
. . .
WARNING: Vessel is attempting access to relay, most likely following lost signal, Sending urgent push alert to head of SU and STG.
. . .
DATA CORRUPTED; VIRUS DETECTED IN ESSENTIAL SYSTEMS; PURGING CORE; MFC-.-.-!MELTDOWN IMMINENT!-.-.-;EMERGENCY BROADCAST SENT; PACKET PICKUP PING RECEIVED; MAY YOU LIVE ON IN THE WATERS, GOOD BYE YOUNG ONES.
"BOSS!"
A young woman no older than sixteen runs through a decidedly alien environment, dashing and dodging.
"BOSS!"
*uurgksnd*
Caught by the neck by a suddenly appearing hand from through a too suddenly appearing portal (read door, fancy ass boss!), the girl stops mid-air, a half foot from the ground.
"What have I told you about my private time Sal, you know you're very lucky to be here! You're just one fuck-up away from a new and fresh perspective of the exterior of this fine ship!"
*gurgle* "Boss, to- *chokes* -o tig- *choke* -ht."
Releasing the waste of space, the man just reaching his mid to late thirties takes a breath, pulls out a plasma pistol, a button press and the emitters warm up, and lights a cigarette. "So, Sally, what exactly was so important?"
"Boss, that structure at the edge, by Pluto, well, boss we just got an active ping back from it, seems wielding that mast to the side of Zeta wasn't such a bad idea after all!"
"Now, Sals, come on, we both know it was a good idea, how else was I to get reception up here? Pipboy 3000 only has so much of an aerial." The man said, patting the girl's head.
Swiping at the annoyance Sally turned around, then back, and so forth a few times. "Well what are we gonna do?"
"Well, ain't it obvious?!"
"Of-fucking-course not! I wouldn't ask if I knew, I'd already be on it like a bloatfly on a brahmin's ass!"
"Welp, we lock and load, charge up the guns and ready the shields, notify our allies back on Earth, oh, also, you've got a bit of two hundred year old chip on your face, clean that up, would'ya? Kinda distracting…"
"Lucky us, that, that relay bug was old as all fuck!
Yo, this is zuoul's stream from beyond the relays!
Ooooooooh, scary!
*snurtct* Nah!
Kinda boring really, but here listen to this…"
"
UNKNOWN INSTRUMENTS
Give me a kiss to build a dream on and my imagination will drive upon that kiss_ _ _
Hmmn sweetheart I ask but only this a kiss to build a dream on~_ _ _
Give me a kiss before you leave me and my imagination will feed my hungry heart_ _ _
Leave me one thing before we part a kiss to build a dream on_ _ _
When I'm alone with my advances I'll be with you
Even romances, I can believe they're true
Give me your lips for just a moment zxzdsfasvfvagbnt
"
"Now ain't that just one of the funkiest sounds you've ever heard?!
What even is that thing they're playing, it's like a cross between a xianyq, and a turian, whatsyamacallit, oh screw-it I dunno, but we're gonna find out!
The bug was so old hat I was able to snag some info before the thing scuppered itself!
Check this shit out I mean come on, this is unknown translation software, slightly corrupted, but still it's unlike ANYTHING available anywhere, I know I've asked, exhausted my contacts trying to make sure this is what I think it is!
And~ well~ guess~ what~!
It's a new alien!"