Somehow they were perfect, she realized this as she slipped on the ring. It shined so bright is almost hurt her eyes to look at it. Logan had proposed, she had said she needed time. The truth is she wasn't sure if Logan was the right one for her. She couldn't remember the last time they had talked. Not just spoken but understood. She couldn't remember a time when he kissed her and she couldn't stand. And even though they had progressed farther then any of her other relationships she knew she was playing it safe. She knew from the first time he had led her to his home that he was serious about being serious, but for once she didn't care. Because she wanted, she needed to be a little unconnected, have a little piece of her heart in case things went wrong. Now she found that she still had never given that piece of herself, and then she realized it was no longer hers to give. She was her own person, but she had never felt complete without him. Logan could make her life easier, he allowed her options that no one else could, but by marrying him she would close off an option she needed. So as she spun the ring on her finger she picked up the phone and called the only person who would understand. She thought of calling her mother, she knew she would support her. She knew her mother would say it was her decision, but she didn't know what to do. As the phone rang she resisted the urge to hang up quickly.

"Hello?" His questioning but somehow sarcastic voice made her lose her breath.

"Umm… Hey"

"Rory?"

"Yea its me. I just called to say hi I guess and tell you that you were right all along, but I don't know what im doing anymore. Maybe I don't love him, did you ever get that poet to explain love to you? I could really use a definition right now. God I feel like im drowning, and now im rambling but I just cant seem to stop." Rory took a deep breath.

"Rory?" Rory couldn't help but smile.

"Yea we covered that Jess."

"Are you ok?" She was nodding, but just couldn't tell him yes.

"I don't know."

"I'm in New York and only a hour or so from Star's Hollow. Where are you?"

"About to pack up so I cant meet you at the crap shack."

"Drive safely? And don't think to much till I get there." She could practically hear the smirk in his voice.

Jess shook his head as he hung up the phone. He had barely spoken to Rory Gilmore in years, and the last time he did it didn't end to well for either of them. Now he was dropping every thing because of a phone call. But she did sound like she was on the verge of tears, and he did say he loved her once upon a time. He was not willing to admit it to himself but he could help but think that maybe he still did.

When Jess pulled up he had barely had stopped the car and gotten the keys out when he was on the porch holding a crying Rory in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she buried her head in his shoulder. He picked her up carefully, and wondered what had made her so upset. He picked her up, gently carrying her up the stairs. Wondering why she hadn't gone to cry on her mother's shoulder. Not caring how it would look he kicked on the door, not able to use his arms to knock. Rory for her part had just wrapped her legs around him, trying to quiet her sobbing.

Lorelei grumbled as she got out of bed, cursing at whoever was knocking loudly on her door at midnight. She opened the door, ready to release a tirade of lecture and curses but was stunned into silence. Jess was standing at her door, with Rory crying in his arms.

"You could open the door a little wider, so I can get in you know." Jess was sarcastic to cover up his fear over a broken Rory.

"Yea umm come in. What happened?"

"I don't know, I feel like I should be asking you. She just called me and I came. God im like a puppy. Coming when im called." Jess softly laid Rory on the couch, having to half lay beside her because she wouldn't let go of him. Lorelei put her hands over her mouth, trying to not over act. Her daughter was in tears, had called Jess before her. Jess of all people was what stunned her. He was brushing her hair back and wiping away her tears, making shushing noises. "Rory, hey, you can stop crying now. Lorelei you could help now, how do you get her to stop crying?" Rory glanced up at him, then before he knew what was happening she had reached up and kissed him.

Lorelei coughed and Jess pulled back slightly. Rory sat up, blushing deeply. She reached out a hand and touched the side of his face gently. He pulled back quickly and grabbed her hand. "What is this?" He held out her hand, so the ring Logan had given her flashed in the dim light. Lorelei gasped.

"Did you say yes?" Rory shook her head, the tears coming again as Jess stood up quickly. "So you said no and you are still wearing the ring?" Again Rory shook her head. "Then what? Because I'm confused and lover boy over there doesn't seem to informed either." Jess glared at the nickname, then started pacing.

"I didn't say anything. I don't know what to say. I love him enough to not want to hurt him, but I don't think that's enough. And I have my doubts, should I have my doubts when a guy who I should be madly in love with asks me to marry him?" She looked at Jess, willing him to understand.

"I don't think I want to marry someone I have to make excuses for. Jess stop! I'm sorry ok? I knew he was a jerk, but it was ok because he could show me the world and help me become who I wanted to be. But the truth is he makes me someone I can't stand. I love him because he remind me of you, just a little and I wanted that to be enough. He made me feel that excitement, well at least a little bit of it, like when I was with you. My stomach didn't get butterflies when he kissed me but that was ok because I knew he would never leave. The truth is I could never love him, not with the way I'm still in love with you." Rory sat there, trying to figure out why she said those things. She slipped the ring off her finger and walked into her room. Trying not to cry at Jess's silence, he needed time to process. Her mother followed her into her room, where she went into her closet and retrieved one of the boxes from the top shelf. This was her Logan box; she had never gotten rid of it after they had broken up for the first time and gotten back together. She lifted up the top, barely looking at the objects inside before dropping the ring in it. She grabbed the tape on her desk and went to tape the box closed but Jess had picked it up and dumped it out on her bed. A dress, that looked extremely exspensive, a rocket. A ring that shined just a little too much, and a bunch of things that he could probably never afford. She picked up the dress, and smiled at the memory of her spinning around when she first put it on.

"He took me to this life and death brigade event. He got me a dress, its beautiful isn't it?"

"It isn't you." She just nodded softly and softly put the dress in the box then each item, laying the ring on top before closing and taping up the box.

"Maybe that was just a different me."

"Not the real you, not the you I am in love with." She glanced up at him, then looked around her room, looking for her mother who was nowhere to be seen.

"How can you be in love with me? I tried to use you, I tried to sleep with you to get back at a man I was just considering marrying."

"You and me. It's what it is." She smiled and wrapped her arms around him.

"Can it be different this time around?" He nodded as he kissed her. She took a step back, her arms still wrapped just as tightly around him, making it impossible for him to not follow her. He followed her as her knees hit the back of the bed, he followed her as she toyed with the hem of his shirt. He even kissed her when she kissed him, but he rolled away as she reached for the button of his jeans.

"If its going to be different then you need to say goodbye to him first. I want you but I don't want him to come with it." She nodded and went to curl into his side.

"So do I have a boyfriend box to?" She just giggled as she hit his chest. The truth was yes and that one didn't have a lid. It was too heavy for her to lift because everything she could think of when he left reminded her of him. She smiled as a thought came to her.

"What?"

"I guess I can read Howl without crying now." He just looked at her quizzically as she tucked her head onto his shoulder. As she fell asleep he reached into her pocket without waking her and grabbed her cell phone. He typed a quick message to Lorelei who he was sure was going crazy with nerves. She will be ok. Promise.