Disclaimer: Characters and world courtesy of Cassandra Clare.

January 2008

When Magnus came through the door he was greeted by the sight of his boyfriend watching him from the couch. Alec had a thoughtful look on his face, and the notebook Magnus had given him lay on the coffee table in front of him.

"Good evening darling" Magnus walked up and leaned over his boyfriend to peck him on the lips, "been reading again?"

It had been a common occurrence in the few weeks since they'd returned from Irdris: Magnus finding Alec contemplating one of his life stories which he'd just read. Sometimes he looked sad, sometimes entertained, sometimes simply thoughtful, and sometimes there were so many mixed emotions flitting across his face it was impossible for Magnus, no matter how good he was at reading people (and especially Alec), to know exactly what he was thinking. Alec would then ask Magnus questions about the story itself or related things, or sometimes he would just walk over and hold him, whispering that he loved him no matter what and that he deserved so much better from life.

Magnus had been so afraid of his reaction to some of the stories; afraid Alec would look at him and his life and see the monster he sometimes still saw in the mirror even after centuries of teaching himself to see a person. But instead Alec had reacted with love and compassion and understanding and everything Magnus had always needed but couldn't believe anyone would give to him so honestly and with full understanding of who and what he was. Magnus could tell that some of the things Alec read had made him somewhat uncomfortable. There were certainly things Magnus had done that Alec didn't agree with, he knew that. Yet Alec seemed to simply be happy that he was no longer keeping secrets. Magnus couldn't believe how lucky he was to have Alec, this Nephilium who brought him peace and love like he had never experienced before. Who made him start to really understand, for the first time, what home and family meant.

Their conversations on these afternoons and evenings had led to Magnus sharing a lot more stories then those written in the book. They had laughed together, cried together (though neither of them would admit that to anyone), and been utterly vulnerable with each other. Sometimes the conversations ended up being about Alec, and Magnus's heart broke a little at hearing some of the things Robert had said to Alec. But over that week they had become closer than they had ever been; closer than Magnus thought he'd ever been or would ever be with anyone.

"You've never been married, have you?" Alec stated more than asked, cutting Magnus's thoughts short.

"I've never even been engaged," Magnus responded with a shrug as he turned towards the kitchen, "what would you like to eat? I'll order something, and then we can chat."

Alec paused for a moment. "I had some dinner with Izzy and Jace earlier, we went on a quick hunt just after sundown. But I could use a coffee?" Magnus smiled at his boyfriend and with a flick of his fingers a steaming cup of coffee appeared in Alec's hand. Alec silently thanked the Angel that he no longer jumped ever time Magnus did that- he was tired of spilling hot liquids on his hand.

A couple of minutes later Magnus returned from the kitchen with his phone still in his hands. "I ordered pizza, should be here in about half an hour. And I KNOW you'll eat half of it no matter what you say, so I got lots." Magnus smirked at Alec who was rolling his eyes. It amazed Magnus how much Alec ate, and he had lived with werewolves. Then again, his boyfriend was very active with all those hunts and all that training… those abs had to come from somewhere.

Magnus settled into the couch beside Alec and rested his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "So, what's the topic for today? And I swear, I ACTUALLY don't know why they banned me from Peru, though I'd love to. What exactly entails 'crimes unspeakable' to the Peruvian High Warlocks Council anyway?"

Alec smiled a little and kissed Magnus sweetly on the forehead before, much to Magnus's chagrin, pulling away from the warlock to sit cross-legged on the couch facing him. "Why have you never gotten married or engaged?" Alec asked, tilting his head a little to the side. He looked confused, but also a little guarded, though Magnus couldn't quite figure out why. "You've obviously loved people before, and even stayed a mortal lifetime with a couple of them, so why not marriage?"

Magnus paused a moment to collect his thoughts into something that would make sense. He had his reasons, however reasonable or not they may seem to anyone else, but he wasn't used to sharing them with anyone. It was harder than he'd ever expected to share a personal thought process with someone in a way that made sense to them. Maybe that was why Catarina always said he had terrible ideas. Or maybe she just had no sense of adventure.

"Marriage is meant to be a lifelong commitment, or at least it was during the times I was with anyone else, and that was not really an option with me. I wouldn't want to marry someone who I didn't want to spend the rest of my long life with; it wouldn't be an equal commitment. There was no-one who it would have been worth being a widower for all eternity for. Plus, most people left me once they really understood what it meant to be a warlock, to be stuck in time. Once they realized they wanted children and someone to grow old with. Once the magic stopped being exciting and new and glamorous." Magnus voice had dropped a little by the end of his speech, and Alec must have heard the hurt he tried to hide because suddenly he was engulfed by strong arms which held him tightly as Alec murmured "I'll never leave you Magnus, I will love you for the rest of my life, you deserve to be loved, and anyone who left you for reasons like that was a fool."

Magnus smiled weakly at him just as the buzzer went off, announcing the arrival of their pizza.

After dinner (during with Alec, though apparently not hungry, managed to eat most of a large pizza), the talk moved on to other topics. Alec seemed a little sad, though when Magnus asked what was wrong he smiled and said it was nothing, he was just tired. It had been a rough couple of months on both of them and especially on Alec's family, so Magnus dropped the subject in favour of kissing Alec and suggesting bed and cuddling.