Carol found a book...It wasn't the kind of book she thought it was going to be. It was a diary, it was the only thing there. And she wanted to know what life was before the world ended. She remembered it well, but she wanted a glimpse of life with no abuse. She read the first page.
I held my baby in my arms. I was waiting for Daryl to get back and beat me to a bloody pulp. I feared for the baby. My baby, there was a resemblence. I named him after my sister. Not her name, but that one rare name that she found so cute. Daryl would be mad that he wasn't named after him. Merle, my baby boy. Daryl came in, in a drunk rage. I held him tighter, so tight he started to cry. I didn't want Daryl to hurt him. My hand hovered over his face.
"You didn't do it, did you?"
"No, my sister"
"Shut the fuck up"
Then, thank god, he left the room.
Carol understood who's diary she was reading. She peeled the tattered page that was stuck to the cover. Then she knew she was right. The page said:
This is the diary of Josephine Lisa Dixon
Then she read the last line of that same entry.
I didn't hold anyone like that again for twelve years.
She flipped through the book, remembering that Daryl and Merle were twelve years apart. Daryl was ten years apart from Sedey. Then Carol found another entry that started almost the same way.
Merle was sitting in the corner. His eyes were wandering. Those eyes. Just like his father's. He was gonna get mad if Daryl didn't look like him, he just didn't notice just how much Merle looked like him. Me and Merle made a plan that we won't tell Daryl he was named after his father. We'll tell him his name was Dale or David. That he only go the same letter. He came in.
"Well?"
"His name is Daryl"
Merle's eyes were carefully following him.
"Well...good"
He raised his hand and formed a fist. My hand hovered over Daryl's face, just like it did for Merle. Then Merle came up from behind him and locked his arms behind his back. He struggled then threw Merle off of him. He glared at him. Then he just walked away.
Then a little while later...I could swear that I fell asleep with Daryl in my arms. I heard whispers. I shifted my head just so I could see Merle, but he couldn't see my open eyes. He had Dary in his arms. He was whispering to him.
"Don't be scared of her, baby brother, she was only putting her hand over your face to protect you from our daddy, he's an ass"
I got much more used to hearing Merle swear. It didn't make me cringe anymore.
"He hits me and I'm not gonna lie, baby brother, he'll probably gonna hit you too"
It took me a minute to hold back my tears.
"But, I'll try not to let him get to you. Thats what I'm here for. But mom's here too, she'll always be here for us. I'm not kidding either, she told me when I was six"
He remembered me tell him that, I had to try not to listen anymore or I would start crying and he would know that I was listenning.
"I am my brothers keeper"
And I swear that I saw him kiss Daryl on the head. Merle had a soft spot for Daryl. And thats about when I fell asleep.
Carol was holding back tears of her own. She really wanted someone to talk to, to hug. Carl and Sophia were out playing with Glenn and didn't want to disturb them. But she at least needed Daryl. She went to the back of the house, into the forest and looked for him.