Title: Two Wrongs Make a Right
Warnings: language, and crappy writing skills. unbeta'd
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Not mine.
A/N: Happy Axel day! 8/8/8! I wrote this baby up in like 2 days before August 8th. Oh man was I rushed. Anyways, enough of my rambling. Enjoy the story!
It was one of those times. It was only-god-wants-to-know-how-early o'clock and I-Axel-had to pee. Bad.
I was having a pleasant dream, albeit strange, but pleasant. It involved skinny dipping in pudding and then going on a quest with Roxas to steal Pooh's honey for the ultimate prank. Oh, and we had a theme song, and Xemnas and Marluxia were cheerleaders dancing to said theme song. It made more sense when I was dreaming it.
Anyway, I was brutally torn away from my dream because I was seeing yellow. I had to piss like a fricken race horse.
We aren't supposed to portal into the only bathroom we had in the whole stinkin' castle (Hint, Hint. Superior, this means you), for obvious reasons. But I figured, why the hell not? So I Blue-Ski-doo'd myself into the bathroom.
Luckily, no one was occupying the bathroom at the time.
I relieved myself.
...What? So the former sentence is lacking. I'm not going to describe how I whipped out my junk and pissed magic and rainbows into the good ol' porcelain king.
That's when my dilemma started. Should I flush? Or not? If I flushed it would echo across the whole castle and everyone would wake up and Xemnas would wake up and I would most definitely shit myself. Or even worse, the two blonds on either side of the bathroom would wake up, and I would probably not have the lower extremity Im so fond of anymore. That's right, the bathroom was in between Larxene and Roxas' rooms. But, if I don't flush, it would probably smell up the bathroom by morning and one of the two blondes-who always get the bathroom first-would find it, somehow know it was me, and I would once again be without a lower appendage.
I ended up flushing.
The toilet always seems louder at night. Especially ours. It's gone through too many hangovers, diarrhea explosions, and hormonal women. It kind of gurgles loudly now. So when you wake up in the morning--
Someone shuffling around outside the bathroom door broke me from my musings. I froze.
'OhpleaseohpleaseOHPLEASE be Pooh wanting his honey back.'
My life flashed before my eyes as the door knob turned. I lost my sanity bit by bit as the door slowly creaked open bit by bit, to reveal-that was definitely not Pooh. It was a dazed looking Roxas in a wife beater and a pair of green drawstring pants.
He gave a short nod of acknowledgement to me as he shut the door behind himself.
"Jeez Roxie, You normally dress up for bed?" Oops. There goes my diarrhea of the mouth. I couldn't help it though, he was wearing socks. That was 10 times more than what I wear to bed during winter.
Me? I was currently wearing grey sweatpants. That was it.
"Fuck off and die," was his curt reply, packaged with the Roxas Death glare(c) that didn't really work while he was peeing.
Well, it seems Roxas swears even while half asleep, or as Demyx puts it, half awake. He's quite the potty mouth. I bet when I flushed the toilet spoke to him in some secret potty language that only potty mouths understand, telling him to get his ass in here.
My eyes widened with realization.
"You betrayer!" I shouted, pointing at the potty.
Roxas cocked an eyebrow, and I'm pretty sure I was as red as a tomato. It's not considered sane when you shout at the toilet you best friend is currently peeing in.
Now that I mention it, why is he still peeing? That's way more magic and rainbows than what came out of my dick.
"Are you going to just stand there letting the water run or are you going to let me wash my hands?"
Oh oops. I was to engrossed in Roxas that I forgot I was about to wash my hands.
"Oh." I stepped away from the sink and he moved in to wash his hands.
"So why are you up this late anyways?" he asked.
"Mmmm...I woke up and had to pee something terrible. You?"
"I've had some bad insomnia all week. Demyx suggested drinking warm milk. So I did. A couple jours later I wasn't asleep and I had to piss."
Roxas shook his hands dry and shut off the tap.
"What's been keepin' you up?" I inquired as I walked out into the hall. Roxas followed close behind.
Oh, and I did not miss that light blush adorning Roxie's cheeks.
"Um...just thinking."
"About?" His cheeks got redder.
"...nothing."
"Or should I say about who?" I smirked. Bingo. Roxas' face could rival my hair at the moment.
"...Shut up."
"Come on Roxie! Who is it?"
"no."
"pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease--"
"no."
"--pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease--"
"Not gonna happen."
"--pleasepleasseplease-breath-pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease--"
"Fine. I'll tell you."
"--pleasepleaseplease-Oh Really!? Yay!"
I was genuinely curious about his answer, but somehow it felt bittersweet. It was like I felt incomplete, unhappy. This part of my didn't want to hear his answer. My chest hurt a little when I thought about it, right where my heart would be if I had one.
There was a pregnant pause as Roxas gathered his bravery. I used it to sort out the waves of emotion drowning me. Or the memories of emotions echoing in my empty shell of a body.
The first was easy, hatred, but hatred for what? The second, jealousy. The third, fear. Fear of what? Fear for what? I wasn't able to delve deeper. Roxas had started talking.
"--ou ever felt like you may have a heart? Like it's not some random empty memory replaying. As if...you're really feeling, ya know? Have you ever felt genuinely happy-complete if you will?" his voice lowered to a whisper, "Have you ever felt like kissing someone, holding someone, loving someone...but not in a lustful way?"
Ah, lust. Something Roxas and I had succumbed to many times. It's only physical attraction, raw want. Nobodies have bodies, they 'feel' lust. Like cleaning the surface of the dirty fish tank of emotions, not the whole thing.
Roxas did something complete unexpected after he finished. He kissed me.
It wasn't on the lips or my jaw or my neck, he kissed my cheek. As in the way great aunts that no one remembers greets their grand nephews and nieces, and Oh man did it feel great. It wasn't a lust filled kiss, it was soft and made me feel fuzzy and warm. I liked it. A lot.
Roxas pulled back with a pained expression on his face. I identified it almost instantly. Rejection. He was feeling rejected.
I stared into his big cerulean eyes for a few seconds before he bolted off down the corridor. I swore I saw them gloss over.
"Roxas!" I shouted as I ran after him. Thank Kingdom Hearts for my long legs. I caught up with him as he rounded the corner.
"What the fuck do you want Axel?! Go ahead and run off to your fucking buddies so you can fucking tell them about how I think I have a heart and that I fucking like you. Just--"
"Roxas."
"--go and let them-What?"
"Shut up."
I don't know what I was thinking. As soon as I had grabbed his arm to make him face me when I had caught up with him, the only thing running through my mind was 'kisshimkisshimkisshimKISSHIM' but he wouldn't stop moving his lips.
So I shut him up, by kissing him. On the lips.
It was a little sloppy and uncoordinated since his mouth was half open, but it was totally unlike the heady kisses we had shared before. It was a short and chaste little kiss, but it felt like so much more. I felt like it was conveying all the strange emotions Roxas had evoked within me, to him.
Roxas didn't think so.. When I pulled back he looked utterly miserable and his unshed tears from before fell freely down his cheeks.
"Axel. I fucking hate you! Do you think it's fun screwing with me? Do you? Do you like fucking with my feelings Axel?"
A heavy feeling hit me like a pile of pricks and I did not like it. My chest hurt again.
"Roxas, what makes you think I'm screwing with you!? I think I fucking like you so I return your feelings and you think I'm fucking screwing with you? Roxas, it made me feel really fucking happy when you kissed me on the cheek, Far happier than I should've felt. Assuming makes a fucking ass out of you and me, Roxas."
We stood there, panting and red from our anger. And oh boy were we mad. Roxas was so angry his face was completely blank, and I had dropped the f bomb at least once in each sentence. Oh yes, we were mad.
A door slammed and a very livid Larxene stormed over to us. Oh, we had nothing on her when it came to anger right now.
"You two, kiss and make up. Then go make butt babies in your room or something, because I WANT SOME GODDAMN SLEEP THAT I FUCKING DESERVE! Thank you."
She stormed back into her room.
"...I think I just shit myself."
Roxas gave me a curious look and laughed.
"...Me too," he agreed.
"..."
"..."
"...So..." I began, the silence was getting a little to awkward for me.
"...did you really mean all that? Before I mean, about liking me?"
Roxas was embarrassed, but hell, I was too.
"...yeah."
Roxas smiled. It wasn't his normal smirk, he was actually smiling, and I would be lying if I said it wasn't cute.
"I'll...see ya tomorrow then, Axel."
"Yeah, see yah. G'night."
"G'morning."
"...Yeah."
As the last word was said Roxas shut his door. He was still blushing, the little cutie.
As I walked back to my room I came to the conclusion that two wrongs do make a right, because two nobodies could make a heart.
End.
A/N: FINALLY! Although it didn't take that long. It just felt like it.
Jeez, I really suck at angst. And fluff. I don't think I did too terrible though. Reviews would be absolutely lovely.
GAH! The stupid ending line divider keeps disappearing on me. Review please!