What am I here for?
To live?
To Die?
My will to survive has gone, has pass, it never last.
Tears, none of joy or happiness, crashed to the wooden desk, splattering into multiple drops which flew through the air. Sadness trickled through the mammal, but the reason was unknown, lost on him.
He was lost in him. His own thoughts slowly killing him.
You don't matter!
You don't belong!
Why are you even trying to change?
Dad should killed me when he had the chance!
A sick cough erupted from deep within Nick's chest. He rocked with power of it.
The fox sat at his own desk at his own apartment. His furry elbows were propping his head up while tears fell freely from his red eyes. He sniffled once, then slammed his hands onto his desk.
"Why the fuck am I like this!" He shouted to no one. "Why can't I be normal?"
Nick sighed, and with a grunt of effort, he pushed himself from his desk. He reached for the bottom right drawer and pulled it out.
He gasped upon what he saw. He knew he was going for it, but really doing it was something else. The large silvery handgun he pulled out was heavier than he imagined. Nick purchased it for self defence, he never would have guessed he would use it for the opposite reason.
Nick brought the tip to his head, where tears flowed from his eyes. His hand grasped the trigger and prepared to fire. Shutting his eyes tight, he pulled.
...
...
...
He pulled again, but nothing fired.
Safety
A smirk made its way on Nick's crying muzzle for a moment, then was gone, replaced with his sad expression. With a flick of his thumb, safety was off, and the next moment, gun back in place. This time though, Nick's smirk was in place.
"I wonder if anyone will notice." He thought aloud.
His finger was back in place, ready to kill.
"I'm doing this, I'm really doing this."
His eyes snapped shut and-
Bang!
Nick hopped from his seat as his front door was kicked open. Judy appeared a second later. Her eyes widened open seeing him with tears and a gun to his head. She flicked her phone open and dialed a number. A short conversation was spoken, then Judy hung up.
"An ambulance will be here soon Nick."
A/N Sorry for the complete lack in everything. I've just been strugling with my emotions and I need a way to vent.
Please Review