The Tales of Life
Pairing: Duo/Heero
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1.729
Warnings: deep stuff, some sap
Summary: Duo explains something about life.
Authors Note: Well, not sure what I really should make out of this. But this is what happens when I'm starting to write when I'm depressed. I'm still kinda surprised it turned out so… positive^^;; I actually wrote all what Duo is saying at first because of one of my depressed fits and then decided to put it into a ff ^^;; *shrugs* I thought it would be kind of a waste if I didn't, even though it might only be some nonsense, who knows XD
Special note: I'm dedicating this little piece to sharona1x2. I'm still working on your ff ^^;; I'm sorry that stuff like this is the only thing that's coming out right now . I hope this will be good enough for the time being ^^;; *hugs you*
The Tales of Life
"At some point in life there is usually the realization that everything you have done so far, everything you have worked for, everything you have hoped for – was for nothing. You'll realize that all the things you thought would matter – just don't. That people you thought you could name your friends – aren't. And then, when you're standing there, alone, with no idea where to go or what to do, you break.
"And you'll be born anew.
"You'll break down, lose everything that's important to you, do things you never would have imagined doing and think you'll lose yourself. But out of this desperation, there will be born something else.
"A new hope.
"New hope and new confidence, mixed together with the anger of your lost years. The anger is your driving force, the fuel that you need to stand back up after you were already down. You use it to turn it around on you and others, use it to strengthen yourself. Born out of this anger you'll get new ideas, new prospects and new hope. You'll realize that while you have been fucked over by life – the fight is only over once you decide it's over. It'll only be over once you stay down and don't get back up again. For as long as you get back up again, you can spit fate in the face and take matters into your own hands.
"Not everything will be perfect, and not everything will be easy – quite the contrary in fact. Starting a new life is hard and it'll take a lot out of you. You'll need to change your way of thinking, your way of acting. You'll have to revise yourself and make yourself into something that is worthy in your eyes. Don't make the mistake of blending. Don't work yourself into a puppet for others to use. Don't be only one of thousands.
"Work on being you.
"Most will say that the person they are was what got them into the whole mess to begin with. But most also won't get that everyone is more than just one single being. There are countless possibilities how one single person can mature, can develop and grow. But as different as these options are – they are the same deep down. Everyone has the right to change themselves. And everyone also should know what kind of person is slumbering deep down within them. Because only once you manage to wake the real you, you can start to live accordingly to what you need. You'll start to blossom and realize that all you ever needed was to find yourself.
"Because if you never find yourself, no-one can help the real you.
"And once you found yourself, once you found your way back to your feet, you can start anew. You can work on opening a new door to a new life, with endless possibilities laid open for you. You don't need others to rely on – they are only there to support you. But no matter what, it's still your fight. You have your cheerleading section with those people who stand by you, but they can't live your life for you, can't make things happen that you need to do yourself. You need to stand up for yourself if you ever want to reach something.
"And that, my friend, is what you should do once you come to that one point in live where you think everything you do is for nothing at all. You need to strengthen your back and stand back up, face your misfortune – and work on a new direction in your life. Because it's pretty clear that the way you have been going isn't working for you. But only because one bridge – or even two or three bridges – decided to crumble below your feet doesn't mean that there aren't others that you can take. That will hold out on you and carry you safely to wherever you want to go. You just aren't allowed to lose sight of the end of your way. At the end there lies your personal happiness, your goal in life. And once you reach that point, then you'll realize that it was all worth it. The pain and the tears, the disappointment and the resignation. Because everything in life has a price. And the higher the price, the higher will be your reward."
Duo smiled at the young man that he had been talking to, taking in the slow nod and seeing all the signs of someone actually getting what he was saying. Not that it was all that unusual an occurrence, but it was still nice to see. Then the young man smiled, got up and bowed towards the slightly older and longhaired man.
"Thank you Mister Maxwell. You've helped me a lot. I'll try to follow your guidance as good as I can."
Duo shook his head, watching confusion flicker over the other's features.
"Tsk tsk, don't try, do it. Everyone has the power for that within themselves. You just need to find it. You can't start the first hour of your new life with vague statements like trying. Make it clear to yourself that this is what you're going to do – and you'll find that the decision to do it is half the way for a new start." Duo corrected him, receiving another, more vigorous nod.
"I'll do that then. Thanks again so much Mister Maxwell! I'll come to see you once I got my new life started." The man beamed at him and waved as he went out of the front door, leaving a grinning Duo behind.
Once the door closed behind the last of his problem cases for today he slouched back into his chair, rubbing his tired eyes. While he loved his job, eight hours each day of trying to get other people to understand what's important in life wasn't the easiest of tasks.
Faintly he could hear footsteps on the soft fabric of the carpet of his office, leading the person to stand behind him. He wasn't surprised in the least as two hands fell down on his shoulders and started to massage his stiff muscles. Not surprised, no, but still pleased.
"I take it you managed to convince another one?" came the soft voice of his lover slightly behind him and he smiled.
"Yep, seems like the Maxwell-charm does it again." He replied grinning, leaning back some more to look up at the slightly amused face of the Japanese man.
"I never doubted that it will." Heero answered before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on the lips of his partner. Straightening up once more he continued to massage the longhaired man's shoulders while looking at the certificate that was placed on the opposite wall to the desk, a group of comfortable armchairs and a small table taking in the most space in the office, one of said armchairs was still occupied by the residing 'Mr. Maxwell'.
"You know that back, when you decided to study psychology and educational theory, I wasn't sure if that would be the right decision on your part. With our pasts it stood to reason that you would have some troubles trying to mend other people's lives, especially young people's lives, whose way of growing up you couldn't even fully understand because of your own upbringing – if one could call it that. But looking back now, I don't even know why I thought that. I couldn't think of anyone better for the job. With your own experiences and all the knowledge that you got before you even turned twenty you're better qualified than most of the aged and tried psychological professors."
Moving away from his place behind the armchair he sat down on one of the arms and laid his hand on one of Duo's cheeks, smiling warmly.
"I'm proud of you. You took everything that you're teaching now to heart yourself and managed to get a new life out of the shards of your past, no matter what anyone else said or believed. You really are the prime example for everything you and your teachings stand for."
He leaned in for another kiss, opening his mouth willingly to Duo's coaxing tongue. They kissed for some time, never straying away from the warm and comfortable way of kissing, before the violet-eyed man pulled back again, taking Heero's hand in his.
"You haven't turned out too bad yourself, you know." He told him, the love he felt reflected in his eyes. The shorthaired man's grin returned at that.
"I'm nothing special. I only take stock of your accounts and try to not get you ruined." He countered, snorting slightly while still grinning. They both knew Heero preferred it this way. A small job out of the way, without any real recognition. He had been only too glad to finally be out of the spotlight. And seeing that Duo didn't seem to have any sense for money at all – something that could led back to his life before becoming a pilot – it was the perfect arrangement for them both.
Duo raised one eyebrow and suddenly pulled on the hand that he was still holding, causing his lover to fall into his lap where he wrapped his arms tightly around him and made sure to pull him close, his expression serious as he looked into the face only a few inches away.
"You, Heero Yuy, are nothing less special than the next person. In fact, you're way more special than anyone else, simply because you are you. Don't belittle what you are, especially not to me. You are you, and that's the most beautiful person that I know – inside and out." Duo told him, squeezing his arms around him even tighter.
Heero simply smiled and leaned against his partner's shoulder, his eyes sliding contentedly closed. No matter how often Duo would protest that he was the most special being on the face of earth. In his head, there was nothing that could ever compare to his longhaired lover. But he guessed that was just another of these things that lay in the 'eye of the beholder'. Not that it mattered. They had given up long ago getting the other to understand how they saw each other.
And as long as they looked at each other with eyes that reflected their love, everything was perfect.
END