Dissidia Madness
Chapter 1: Just the beggining
A/N: Yeah i know its in the wrong section but none of the sections really fit the category. Final Fantasy 7 characters play big roles in this story so dont think its like final fantasy 8 in the final fantasy 7 category.
The school bells rung and the busy bodies moved about. Balam Garden was known or its beautiful setting. Despite hearing the bell for passing period a man dressed uniquely sat on a bench his eyes locked on the near by women.
"Irving are you staring at the freshman again? Your going to be a senior next year have some dignity"
the sound of the approaching woman's voice pierced his ears as he turned to the sight of a beautiful blonde lady. Her sky blue eyes were shielded by a pair of glasses and her milky skin was complimented by her garments and excellent physique.
"Your right I should be looking at girls like you Quistis"
Irving gave her a perverted smile which was met by a text book going across his head.
"Get to class you" Quistis was blushing slightly as she urged him on. He proceeded into the class all the while continuously staring at the girls.
(In class)
"It's about time you showed up Irving don't tell me you were staring at the babes again" a man teased right as he walked in.
The class was full of familiar faces from the previous adventures. Irving took his seat next to his inquiry.
"Well at least im not dumb enough to get a tattoo on my face Zell" Irving countered and after laughing the two slapped hands they were obviously friends.
"Zell theres no eating in class!" Rinoa exclaimed enthusiastic about following the rules.
"Calm down teacher's pet, this hot dog's just about finished anyways." Zell answered casually before taking another bite.
Just as his teeth sunk into the bread Quistis opened the door and stopped in her tracks her eyes locked on Zell.
"Get that hot dog out of my damn classroom Zell!"
Quistis unraveled her whip and popped the hot dog out of Zell's hand. Zell shrieked and wasted condiments all over the floor.
"And clean up that mess!" Quistis begin swinging her whip signaling a second strike which was all the motivation Zell needed to quickly make his way to the trashcan dodging the whip just in time.
"See" Rinoa simply said and Zell shrugged.
"teacher!!! I need to pee!" a young girl wined until she was heard
"go ahead Selphie, as for the rest of you id like to see last nights homework. If you decided not to do it or cheated expect 7 licks from my whip" Quistis cracked the ground and the students began digging through their bags hastefully.
"We aren't in a circus if I don't see some homework some asses are going to get scarred"
Quistis made her way around the room.
Just then the students turned to the loud sound of the door opening. A woman entered the room her appearance was rather trashy with a revealing white shirt that barely touched her belly button. She wore a black skirt that barely past her inner thighs and her hair was held back in a pony tail.
"Your late Tifa and you violating the dress code" Quisis crossed her hands.
"Yeah well today's laundry day" Tifa sat in her seat across from a blonde haired man whom continuously stared at her.
"I noticed you didn't greet me today Tifa" he finally spoke up
"Yeah well you didn't think id be on your nuts forever did you cloud?" Tifa snapped at him
"hahahaha I was waiting to hear that" Irving was tickled.
"W-what? But I thought that-" Cloud was cut off by another witty reply
"you thought Id be waiting around like a spare tire? I don't even know why I was stuck on your ass your dick is only four inches long" Tifa told him off and the class ate it up with heavy laughter and instigation.
"w-well at least Aerith doesn't dress like a slut" Cloud grabbed anything he could find.
"Aerith may not dress like one but that bitch puts out big time" Squall shouted from the back of the room
"What!? Aerith is the most faithful girl ever!" Cloud tried desperately to convince himself until Gilgamesh suddenly stuck his head in the window
"Nuh uh that bitch aint faithful, best pussy I ever had" he stopped to savor Clouds misery for a moment before departing again as usual. Even Quistis began to snicker at Clouds little world falling apart.
"No…" he said to himself quietly.
"Alright kids that's enough open your books to page twelve" Quistis ended his agonizing quickly. Selphie entered the room again and skipped to her seat. Irving leaned over to Zell and whispered in his ear about Selphie "see that, a white girl with a black girl's ass" Zell laughed to himself and Selphie looked confused at the two.
(P.E. Class)
"Hey Seifer look its Sora's punkass" Ryujin pointed in the kids direction
"that twerp hasn't paid me yet" Seifer rubbed his chin arrogant as ever.
"Fuck with him" Fujin suggested as the trio began approaching him.
"Well if it isn't the key blade master" Seifer and his crew towered over the young and naïve freshman.
"Oh hey what's sup Seifer" Sora responded cheerfully and reached his hand out inviting a shake.
"I'm not your friend dumbass" Seifer knocked his hand away before pushing him into his locker causing loud noise also drawing the attention of their peers.
"Oh shit looks like Sora's going to get beat up again" Squall instigated.
Sora covered his head and began calling out for his friends
"Donald! Goofy!" his cries were unanswered and the impatient Seifer reached out his hand.
"You haven't paid me yet, I thought we made it clear that your lunch money is mine to spend!" Seifer yelled freighting Sora.
"Please you have to understand I gave my money to Roxas he would've killed me if I didn't!" Sora searched Seifer's eyes for mercy but was instead shoved out of the way by Ryujin.
"well Ryujin and Fujin are going to check your locker maybe we can find something useful to make up for your mishaps." Seifer smiled savoring the laughter of his peers.
"What the fuck is this shit!?" Fujin yanked out a folder containing Yu-gi-oh cards she continued to trash his belongings by scattering them across the floor.
"My blue eyes white dragon!" Sora leaped for his card and just as he grabbed it Ryujin yanked it from him
"yugayho cards are you serious? Give me this shit" he ripped it to shreds and dropped the pieces in Sora's hair.
"Wait guys, lets take these cards and sell them back to his bitch ass" Seifer picked up his collection and put them in his pocket.
"You can't do this my friends are my power!" Sora cried out proudly and everyone laughed at his pathetic statement.
"Alright kid if you want these back your going to have to pay me a dollar for each one and I've counted 50 so far" Seifer spoke calmly after finding a way to get money out of Sora.
"Alright Seifer you've had your fun leave Sora alone you know he can't fight" Kairi walked over to Sora and helped him up.
"Damn Sora saved by a girl?" Wakka called from the crowd. Seifer and his crew walked off they had got what they wanted and soon the crowd left as well until Sora and Kairi were finally alone.
"Thanks Kairi I was in a total pinch" Sora laughed but Kairi was unusually quiet.
"Sora I need to tell you something" She gave him a dead serious expression.
"Is it about the paopu fruit?"
"No" she walked toward the door. "We need to break up Sora" She caught him by surprise just as she anticipated.
"B-but Kairi what about the paopu fruit" Sora argued,
"I don't give a fuck about Paopu Fruits, the world doesn't revolve around them Sora and neither do relationships. It's just that your not manly enough im sorry Sora I already have a pussy I don't need another one, good bye" Sora's heart stopped as he reached for her image quickly leaving out the door.
(Passing Period)
"Ha-ha you should've seen the look on Cloud's face when Tifa told him off" the highly amused Baret shouted.
"I don't care" The long haired associate replied but he continued to listen. "Hah maybe that's because you're a tool Vincent" Baret replied and walked off.
"A tool?" Baret left Vincent in confusion as he caught up to Tidus.
"Hey Tidus you missed out man Cloud just got his ego torn apart by Tifa" Baret shouted
"oh what? Ha-ha I couldn't make it I was helping Yuna with her hangover." Tidus was amused by Clouds dismay.
Vincent approached the two
"who cares about that" He contradicted himself.
"im not your friend Vincent I don't know why your standing here" Tidus looked at him strangely.
"I don't care" Vincent shrugged but continued to hang out.
"Get out of here!" Tidus yelled and Vincent quickly turned the corner in embarrassment.
"Hey boys! Guess what Irving just gave me flowers" the spunky Selphie ran up conveniently after Vincent's departure.
"What Irving's after a freshman? Go figure" Baret laughed to himself.
"I don't care how old he is I gave him my number!" Selphie giggled like the foolish school girl she was.
"So you guys going to hook up or what" Tidus grinned.
Zell caught their attention as he walked by with flyers
"Yo! Rikku's throwing a party tonight but don't tell Vincent about it" Zell handed them flyers.
"Again? She just got Yuna all trashed last night; damn that Rikku is a party animal" Tidus spoke as he read the flyer.
"Hey there children passing periods already over, I doubt you want a visit from Quistis" A long hair man suggested.
"thanks for the heads up Dr. Laguna" Tidus waved as he quickly left the scene.
"By the way Irving says to meet him by the café Selphie" Zell said before throwing the peace sign as he walked off.
"Playing hookie again are we children?"
Quistis seemed to appear out of thin air and she wasted no time revealing her whip.
"NO MA'M" Tidus casted haste on himself and ran off leaving the others to get punished.
(History Class)
"I can't stand this class"
a typical reply came from Vincent who was willingly reading his history book.
"No one cares about you Vince" Rinoa reminded the ever negative Vincent.
"Hey did you guys here about what happened at Rikku's party last night!?" Squall was practically shouting all the while staring at Cloud.
"Oh yeah I heard something about Gilgamesh hooking up with Aerith" Tifa smirked.
"Your liars! Aerith would never" Cloud slammed his fist on the table shaking violently.
"Wait you mean that bitch with the flowers right? The one that pretends she's all innocent and shit? Ha-ha everyone's hit that" Tidus teased not even half serious.
"SHUT UP!" Cloud screamed but his lips were met with the cracking of a whip.
"No one screams in here except for me" Quistis admonished as she sat back down.
Cloud's eyes became glassy as he held his mouth.
"So what's this I hear about you dating some red head Tifa?" Rinoa was playing on Clouds emotions.
"My the rumors spread fast" Tifa and Rinoa giggled.
"Why does everyone hate me?" Vincent suddenly spoke out loud.
"Alright class time to answer my questions" Quistis stood up and looked in her book. "Now for question a; what do all men want?" Quistis looked up for an answer.
"Vagina" Tidus humored the class
"ok smartass that's 40 licks" Quistis cracked her whip.
"I've been hearing about some kind of party" Vincent trailed off and was once again met with silence.
"Anyways where the heck is Yuna at?" Selphie asked Tidus.
"You know how Rikku keeps influencing her, she is hung over for the first time" Tidus explained.
"This is a classroom not a chat room, now the next person that talks without my consent will receive 40 to 60 licks depending on my mood, now Rinoa read question 2" Quistis cracked her whip enforcing order.
"question 2 true or false, Ozma was born when Queen Brahne took a shit" Rinoa forced herself to read the question without laughing.
"hahaha I say so" Irving was entertained and Quistis held her forehead while looking at the ceiling.
(After School)
"Hey Roxas what you got on my 40 homie" Seifer approached him with Ryujin and Fujin.
"Do you know who I am?" Roxas responded sharply while holding on to his girlfriend.
"What do you want Seifer" Namine glared at him.
"You took Sora's lunch money, that's my bitch not yours" Seifer exclaimed to Roxas.
"I didn't take any money from Sora you dumbshit I saw him in the lunch line today" Roxas insulted him.
"You hear that Seifer, the little fucker lied to us" Ryujin instigated.
"Deception" Fujin narrowed her eyes.
"Now as you can see im trying to hang out with my lady here so go bother someone else" Roxas kept walking.
"Yeah we'll let you off this time" Seifer gloated arrogantly.
"Let me off? I whooped your ass back in elementary bitch" Roxas told Seifer off reminding him of their past encounter in twilight town.
"Don't catch a beat down" Seifer yelled at the now distant couple.
(Somewhere else)
"Hey baby this is Cloud, I just was wondering why you were absent today at school you never are usually. you haven't called me or anything I guess you must be busy ha-ha..anyway um call me back when you get this." Cloud hung up his phone with a worried face. Just then he got a text
"hey this is Yuffie why don't you ever answer your phone you dick head!? Anyway tonight I heard Aerith's going to be at Rikku's party just thought id let you know. well see you there"
Cloud was shocked Aerith already made plans for the party but she hadn't thought to call him. Cloud slowly began to realize that something was wrong he closed his phone without answering Yuffie back.
(Rikku's House)
"Im never drinking again Rikku! Lulu was right you're a bad influence" Yuna pouted as her cousin poured a shot.
"Oh come on Yunie it's always like that the first time its gets better here take a shot" Rikku handed her the glass.
"Are you sure? I don't ever want a head ache like that again" Yuna looked at her.
"Yeah go ahead it wont hurt you besides I need your help setting up this party" Rikku assured her.
"Oh alright" Yuna took a sip and began coughing
"HAHA yunie your such a light weight" Rikku teased while handing her a napkin.
"What's a light weight?" Yuna pondered while drinking up the liquor.
"You'll find out soon enough Yunie hee hee" Rikku poured herself a shot as well.
Rikku's phone began ringing she walked over and checked the caller ID in the background Yuna finished off the liquor bottle.
"hmm its Lulu wonder what she wants." She picked up the phone and greeted her.
"Rikku is Yuna still over there? I heard about last night" Lulu questioned
"last night? Oh you mean about Gilgamesh?" Rikku made Lulu chuckle slightly. "Well I heard about that too but I also heard that Yuna's been a bad girl these days is she there right now?" Lulu inquired
"Yeah she's helping me set up tonight's party." Rikku twiddle her thumbs
"She's not drinking again is she?" just then Yuna hiccupped and Rikku covered her mouth.
"Um no she's just kind of here you know. Well anyway why don't you stop by Lulu tonight's going to be hilarious" Rikku quickly changed the subject.
"Hmm guess it couldn't hurt Wakka broke his foot while he was playing sphere ball so he won't be coming"
"You mean blitz ball?" Rikku corrected.
"whatever" Lulu heard a slight snicker.
"Shut up Yunie!" Rikku whispered to the now dancing Yuna.
"What's going on over there?" Lulu questioned the two after hearing Yuna's body hit the ground.
"Listen Lulu I got to go call me when your close by" Rikku hung up before Lulu could even say bye and she ran over to Yuna.
"Quit acting stupid yunie don't tell me you're buzzing already" Rikku made her sit down.
"Im not!" Yuna pushed her back and stood up aggressively.
"Dammit Yuna I didn't say to drink it all" Rikku noticed the empty bottle of E & J "now your going to be fucked up!" she seemed more so amused than worried.
"Where's Tidey whitey!?" Yuna exclaimed while crashing into the nearby wall.
Rikku grabbed Yuna and threw her into one of her back rooms she locked the door and she could hear Yuna tearing the place apart.
"I'll let you out when everyone gets here" Rikku laughed
"I want my tidey whitey" Yuna could be heard speaking in slurs behind the door.
Rikku was tickled by her drunken cousin as she dialed Tidus' number.
"Hey Rikku Yuna better be sober" Tidus picked up on the first ring.
"Um actually get your ass over here right now Tidey whitey" Rikku teased
"Oh great let me guess" Tidus stood up and casted haste on himself in order to get dressed faster.
"You better run like the wind" Rikku pepped before hanging up.
(Back at balamb)
"Why does Kimahri have to be janitor!? This bullshit" Kimahri bitched as he cleaned the brown stained toilets.
END OF CHAPTER 1.