Chapter 1.

Yugi is in his crappy little room above the crappy little card shop

Yugi: Kitty, here kitty kitty

Joey: Since when have you owned a cat?

Yugi: Since now, so shut up and look for my cat

Yugi looks out the window just in time to see his cat getting run over by a steam roller

Yugi: Dark Magician Cat! Noooooooooo! (falls out Window)

Dark Magician Cat: (flattened noises)

Joey: ( jumps out window after yugi since he is so stupid)

The steam roller that is about to run over Yugi and Joey suddenly breaks down

Kid who is driving steamroller: Aaarrgg! The frustration! (dies of frustration and falls out of steamroller, dropping a tape player)

Yugi: (listening to tape player.) Arg! That's the awfulest noise Iv'e ever heard!

Tape player: (in extremely American high voice.) Disguise yourself as road kill!! And run over cats! Jackkeeeeeeeeeeeeeeooooooooooooo!!!!

Joey: Has a beat to it! (does random dance)

Yugi: Whoever did this to you Dark Magician Cat, I'll duel them!!!

Random sound effect: DUM DUM DUMMM!!!!!!!

Joey: But the kid's dead already. (kicks corpse)

Yugi: Then I'll duel the thing that provoked him cause this. I'm really bored and hamtaro isn't on for another half hour.

Joey: Yay hamtaro!

Both turn around to see bakura licking cat blood off the road.

Yugi: Hey! Stop licking my cat!

Bakura: (Gore and asphalt oozing down face.) Spoilsport

Joey: Well I say we take the steamroller!

Yugi: What? We can walk faster than that thing!

Joey: But I still haven't recovered from falling out the window. I think i've ruptured my ovaries!

Yugi: Oh no! Should we call a podiatrist?

Yami: You are both complete idiots.

Joey: Hey, you stay out of this Mr. God On Earth.

Yami: You cut me real deep

Bakura: (licking lips.) There wouldn't be any blood involved, would there?

Yugi: Umm, I think we should leave

Yugi and Joey climb on to steamroller and very slowly depart. Bakura goes back to licking the road.