Author's Notes: Non-magical. Draco/OC(s). Harry/?. This story is dark, it's depressing, none of my stories are going to be this way ever again. I had to do this. This... this is for me. Because if I don't get it out there, I think I'll implode.

Edit: When I first posted this story, I wrote: "Don't read, don't review, just let it be." Then I got a review that said: "If you don't want it read, then why publish it?" So now, that sentence exists no more. This story is out there. It's my story, but it's not forme anymore. It's for you. So, read. Review. Do as you please with it.

Disclaimer: These are the two wonderful characters of J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. Some basics are the same as the books, but the plot is strictly mine.

xXx

You think you know someone. You think you matter to them, because, well, they matter the world to you. But then you find out that you were fucking invisible from the very start, and everything goes to shit.

"I was fucking there for you. I had your back when the whole world turned you down. My door was open when every other door was shut in your face, but I guess that didn't matter, did it? 'Cause in the end you chose him over me. You chose every-fucking-one over me."

He popped in his earphones, turned the volume on max, tried to drown the world out. But you can't really shut your brain, can you? It keeps working, even when you sleep. It keeps going over every scene, replaying every tragedy, analyzing every word.

He tried to bury his nose further down into his sweater. The wind had a chilly bite to it, but that's what you got when you climbed up a 40 story high building and sat on the roof. Sat on the very edge, just on the thin line between falling and flying, but not brave enough to attempt either. Sat there hugging your knees to your chest, raised your head to the sky, and tried to close your eyes against the blinding pain. The pain that threatened to crush your heart to tiny little pieces any minute now.

"Draco, you fucking arsehole."

Not that it mattered now, though, did it? It had never mattered. He had never mattered. He'd just been too blind to see that. Blinded by the fickle light of hope, tricking him, seducing him into believing that one day, just one day, the stupid blonde would finally end the dysfunctional, pathetic long-distance relationship of two years with Eric. He had had it all planned out. Draco would be heartbroken, even though he'd never really loved Eric, and their relationship was long over, neither had just had the guts to admit that. But it would finally be over, without Harry having to ruin it, because it was already in ruins.

And then, then he would be there for Draco day and night. He would text him to sleep and try to say all the lame jokes that would make him laugh and take him out for a spin.

Then he would tell Draco how he really felt about him, and Draco would know. He would know, and he would choose, and he would choose Harry.

But that didn't quite happen.

Most of it did. Draco broke up with Eric. Or maybe Eric broke up with Draco. Harry had never thought to ask. Because Draco never told him that the relationship was over. He told his other friends. Harry had to find out from Ron who'd overheard Crabbe and Goyle talking about it. He found out Draco and Eric were over after they'd been over for a month.

It hurt. It hurt bad. But he didn't say anything. He talked to Draco even more than before, tried to be there for him without saying he was being there for him. He thought it was working. It had been working, hadn't it?

But then... then Draco got back with Eric.

"Draco, you fucking prick."

His friendship with the blonde hiccupped for a week. He avoided Draco, stayed home, mostly in bed, and whined about how shitty life was.

Then he realized that all this moping around wasn't helping anyone. Being around Draco was hard, but not being around him, now that was heartbreaking.

Another three months passed. Nothing changed during those three months. They became closer, told more secrets, found out more about each other's lives. Harry almost believed that Draco felt the same way about him. It was good. It was enough.

Some days it almost was. But other days, nothing was enough. His cooped up feelings would rush up and choke him with their intensity when they would play pool and he could see the perfect line of Draco's body as he leaned over the table, or when he would genuinely laugh at a joke Harry said, or when he would reach up to brush his hand through Harry's hair, trying to style it.

No, it wasn't enough. He wanted more. He wanted to feel Draco's hands on his body. He wanted to feel Draco's breath on his lips. He wanted... well, he wanted a lot of things, but he was too scared to tell Draco about them.

And then it was too late.

Draco found a nice guy, someone from his own 'calibre', and Harry could take it no more. He was tired. He was tired of being invisible. He found out that Hermione had helped get them together, and couldn't believe it. She'd known how he felt about Draco. And yet, she hadn't even given him a heads up. Nope, not even considered mentioning it to Harry that: "Hey, just so you know, I'm hooking up your crush with his crush, which isn't you, by the way."

It was too much. It was too fucking much. He'd pretended to be happy for Draco, 'cause after all, they were best mates, and he was supposed to support him. Wasn't he?

He thought he was. He thought he had. But every time he imagined Draco kissing someone else, touching someone else, fucking someone else... he felt sick to his stomach. It was disgusting. It was all disgusting.

He looked down at the street so many feet below him. He felt the wind sway him forward and thought about how easy it would be to stop pushing back against the wind to keep his footing. How easy it would be to just lean a little more forward, and fall off the edge.

He tried to imagine the rush. Would he faint before he reached the ground? Probably not. Would he hear the screams of the people walking on the sidewalk, watching him take a 'leap of faith'? Possibly not. Would his life flash before his eyes? Definitely not. Would he feel the impact?Of course he would.Would it hurt? Of course it would. How long would it hurt for before it all stopped? Maybe too long. How long before it all ended? Perhaps too short. Would anyone even miss him? No.

Was he brave enough?

No.