Gone and Dead

Hetalia fanfiction by NipaMiiEmi

A/N: Based off of a video I saw. I only saw it 3-4 times and every time I watch it,I cry or shed a few tears. All of a sudden, I thought of Canada and Romano and how their lives were...crappy? No no no I love those two both and you may hate me for making this fanfic but I just felt like writing something like this. Suicide is never the answer you guys. Because in the end, you won't have to live in pain anymore, but everyone else will.
Imma base this off Romano and then right Canada.
I don't own hetalia. If I did it wouldn't ever be the same.

~Dimension 4~

Romano sat at his desk, staring at his tomato colored wall. Not that it interested him so much, but it helped him think. Think about the feelings he felt for all of his life.

"Oh look it's Southern Italy. The oldest,unthriving, depressed brother. What a dick!"

"Oh he's not the actual Italy..."

"What a selfish brat."

"Why can't you be more like your brother?"

Romano clenched his fists hard. All of these thoughts, they were true. Especially the last one:"Why can't you be more like your brother?"

Why couldn't he be like Veneziano;always happy, not alone,protected,cared for, known...It just hurt so much. He couldn't be his brother no matter what he did.

'...It's time to go...'

He kept thinking those words, saying those words over a million times. For many years. But this time, he knew, it was for real. He was tired, so very tired of it all.

He slowly got up and walked out of his room. No one was home, it was the perfect time. He was ready. If he didn't do it now, he was going to keep hating himself. And others hating him. No one cared about him anyways.

Romano opened a closet door and found what he was looking for: Some rope, a chair, and video camera. He took all of those and headed towards his room.

In the snap, everything was all ready and set up. The video camera was sitting on Romano's desk, while he stood on the chair. One end of the rope was tied to the ceiling fan while the other was around his neck. He began to cry, knowing that it was really going to happen, he could feel it. But Romano knew that this was the only option left for him to leave this unbearable pain.

He had the remote control to the camera in his hand, and clicked the record button. As soon as he saw that red dot blink, he began his goodbye:

"Hello everyone...This is Southern Italy Romano. And I just wanted to say that I'm sorry...
I don't know why I'm sorry, but I'm SORRY!
I've...I've lost myself...and just can't seem to find my way back. I'm hated,selfish,cruelly looked upon, no good, unknown..."

Romano paused for a moment. His breathing became ragged and started shaking violently.

"Please...Veneziano, Spain...please don't blame yourself for this. This isn't your fault. And everyone else, it isn't your fault either..

I'm sorry, Veneziano,for being the worse brother ever to you. I am an annoying dickhead fratello. You probably hated me too. After you left with Nonno Rome I thought of he would take you, your the better one. You're the personification of Italy, not me. Don't do anything stupid just because I'm not here. The potato bastard and everyone else better take good care of you. Be strong. Ti amo fratello.

I'm sorry Ludwig..Please do take good care of needs someone better than me to guide him in the right path. I obviously can't do that, and he adores you more. And don't blame yourself either eh? I don't need that crap coming from you potato bastard...

I'm sorry Bella, Belgium...please don't do stupid things while I'm gone. You were like a sister to me and it would hurt me to see or hear you get hurt. Nothing can stop you from being happy and always be happy. Keep your brother from being do blunt too!

I'm sorry France...Just keep being yourself you perverse bastard.I heard you wanted to take me when I was younger. The only thing I ask is why? I'm nothing like my brother. You should've fought for him not me. But ey,don't do anything stupid alright?Just pick up a few woman and your good to go...

I'm sorry Spain...for everything. For being the worst maid when I was small, for being a dick to you, for hitting you, saying I hate you, being selfish,lying,FOR EVERYTHING!I know you probably hate me for all those. So why do you keep smiling and caring for me?!Stupid tomato bastard,you even fought for me! And all I ask is why?!Is it because you just have to cope with me? Why?!You never make any sense!..But that's what I love about you...Ti amo...tomato bastard..

To the rest of the world, I'm sorry...I'm sorry Kiku,Alfred,Arthur,Yao,Ivan,Romania,Heracules,Turk ey,Iceland,Poland,Lithuania,Hungary,Prussia,Austri a,Lithuania,Switzerland,Estonia,Denmark,Canada,Lat via,Belarus,Ukraine,Hong Kong,Taiwan,South Korea,Sealand, Finland,Scotland,and the rest of the world..

I'm even sorry for myself.
I'm sorry for not being strong anymore.
I'm sorry for being a weak selfish fool.
I'm sorry for losing myself.
I'm sorry for putting you through so much pain in your life.
I'm sorry for having you cope with me all your life.
I'm sorry for doing this..."

Romano rose one foot off the chair. Time seemed to slow down as he said, "Goodbye."His hand seemed to slowly raise and click the off button. As soon as that red light stopped blinking, he was off.

Both legs were off the chair and began to thrash wildly in the air. His air supply was cut off and a bunch of pressure and blood went to his head. Romano gasped and wheezed, desperately and unknowingly trying to breathe. But it was too late. He closed his eyes and his body went limp.

The house was filled with a deadly silence. It was too late to go back now, Romano was gone and dead.

There was no going back.

~Dimension 4~

An hour later, the dead silence broke as the door was ,Italy,and Germany walked into the house, ready to get Romano for his surprise party. It was a party planned by all the nations(a few meetings ago)that they all decide to let loose and celebrate Romano's recent victory over a war.

"Fratello~"Italy called out. They all waited for a response. Nothing came.

"Hmm how odd...let's go wake up Roma."Spain said and began to walk towards Romano's room. Before Spain opened the door, he listened to hear Romano's breathing. All he heard was silence. This worried Spain and he instantly opened the door.

"Roma-!"Spain froze, not believing what he saw. Swinging limply in unison on a rope, was Romano. Spain's face turned deathly pale and screamed at the top of his lungs.

Italy and Germany heard this and came running up the stairs."Spain what's wro-!"Italy instantly stopped and froze as he entered the room. There was his fratello,his big brother he loved so much, hanging from the ceiling. Dead.

Italy screamed, "GERMANY HELP!"Italy ran over and started hitting Romano's leg begging him to wake up."ROMANO!FRATELLO!PLEASE PLEASE WAKE UP!" Italy knew that he wasn't going to wake up. No matter how hard he begged or cried. He knew he was dead and that Romano wasn't coming back.

Soon enough, Germany entered the room; instantly froze as well, as he watched Romano's body swing back and forth on a rope. Germany couldn't move. He was as stiff as a board. He looked around the room and sees the video camera and the chair. A few tears came to Germanys eyes as he pulled out his cell phone and called was at loss of words and kept stuttering barely saying, "My friend's brother just committed suicide."

Italy watched Germany through all of this. As soon as Germany hung up, Italy jumped into his arms, crying harder than , Spain was motionless and speechless. He kept staring wide eyed at his lover's body. Something that he took care of for so long and was the most precious thing to his heart is dead. His precious tomate was dead.

Spain world went black before he could touch the floor.

~

After the cops arrived and took Romano's body away, everything changed from that day forth. Spain rarely came out of the house where Romano died, staring out the window the whole day. Italy stayed home too, sobbing every night.

Everyone tried to get them both out of the house, but when they did, Italy and Spain were looking dead themselves.
It was chaotic. World meetings weren't the same anymore. Nobody smiled or even talked. And whenever someone looked at Romano's old seat, they began to tear up, everyone else joining along. They never realized how much they cared for him until he was gone.

A year after his death, the G8 gang and Prussia went to the house where Italy and Spain were, paying a respectful visit. They didn't have any laughs, but they all found the strength to go into Romano's room. When they entered, chills immediately ran up their spines. The ropes that killed him still layer where the cops had put it. The video camera was still on the desk and the chair still on the floor. Italy was basically in tears getting comfort from everyone in the room besides Spain, who was crying silently but no one knew. Japan wanted to take the camera home which everyone thought he was crazy for but let him have it. France and Prussia fixed Romano's bed while everyone else cleaned or admired the room of a once part of a country. After cleaning the room, they all left and shut the door. It remained shut for all the years to come.

When the next world meeting came, Japan wasn't his usual self. He was, in fact, quite spooked and really depressed. It looked as if he was up all night and was too scared to go to sleep.
When everyone asked what had happened, Japan held the camera up. It made them gasp and it was quite obvious what he did. America asked for the camera after the meeting, and passed it on to the other nations for them to see.

10 years later, everyone was able to move on with Romano's death. It took a while, but Italy and Spain were able to endure it. But while things went back to normal, Spain still secretly went to Romano's room and sat against the closed door, talking to himself.

"Why did you do it Roma?...Don't you know I love you?"

Meanwhile, with Nonno Rome, Romano watched as all this hell spreaded. But they were now moving on. It really did stab Romano in the chest to see everyone crying over him over his death.
He thought no one cared.
He thought he was hated.
But he thought wrong. The evidence was right before his eyes.

Romano smiled as he floated his way down to Spain, looking like an angel. He knelt down and kissed the crying Spaniards forehead.

"I'm sorry...Ti amo tomato bastard."