Prolouge
They say everything happens for a reason. That everything's already planned out for you in life. Those weren't the things I wanted to hear though. I wanted to know why my parents thought it was for best for me to be raised without a family, or THEM.
How getting passed from one foster home to the other was something that was "happening for a reason". Whatever the reason it should diffiently show itself soon.
I had no one but myself, somehow though after eight-teen years I learned to be okay with that. I wasn't okay in the state that I suffer through the holidays by myself. Don't even get me started on my birthday. My whole eight-teen years of life my date of birthday has never been celebrated. No one was happy about my birth, about me.
How do you live thinking those kinds of things? I wish I could give you an answer. I guess I could start by saying that I never really lived those past eight-teen years of my life. If that's what you want to call it, a life. I have always felt empty and in-complete my whole life.
Today will be the first day I learn the meaning of joy. The day I am let free, on my own, no one to answer to but myself.
I woke up this morning as I would any other day. Went to bathroom and thankfully it wasn't taken. I handled all my business in the bathroom and made my way back to my room that I shared with four other people. I changed in the corner of the room while the other three girls continued to sleep. This had to be one of the laziest house's I have ever lived in. These people slept until un-godly hours. I was just happy I didn't have to deal with them anymore.
Once I finished dressing I grabbed my already packed suitcase and duffel bag, I made my way down the stairs. I didn't say goodbye to anyone just bolting straight through the doors. As soon as the wind hit my face I smiled a big ol' Cherisher cat smile.
That smile quickly left as soon as it appeared. I had no clue where I was going. Not even a little light into my mind told me where to go. I looked left and that lead to nothing, I whipped my head and looked right and…nothing. The little bit of pride I ever had evaporated as if it was never there. I had nothing, no one, and I was completely alone in this world.
Today was my eight-tenth birthday and today was the day I realized I am alone. I will be alone for the rest of my life.